3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community  

Go Back   3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community > Support Forum > Weight Loss Support

Weight Loss Support Give and get support here!

Handling the Won't Take No For An Answer people

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 02-17-2008, 02:51 PM   #1
Senior Member
 
BattleAx's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 894

S/C/G: 330/ticker/192

Height: 5'10

Default Handling the Won't Take No For An Answer people

How do you respond to people who offer you food, you decline, and they continue to offer it? I admit this is a button-pushing event for me. I find it incredibly rude and disrespectful, and I hate it in any situation in which I've declined an offer, be it food or otherwise. No means no! My usual response is to politely decline a couple of times, and on the third occasion, I say loudly, "I said NO!!!!" Wow, I sound *exactly* like my mother when I was a kid and kept pushing for something.

There must be a better way to handle this. How about some snappy/smart/stops them dead in their tracks responses?
__________________
BattleAx

BattleAx is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 03:06 PM   #2
I'm doing it this time!
 
doIlookfat?'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Central CA
Posts: 293

S/C/G: 189/175/145

Height: 5' 4"

Default

How about, "I'm sorry, but my doctor put me on a real restrictive diet and it's something I can't eat". This way it's not like you are declining because you don't "want it", but instead "can't have it". Maybe the food pushers will be more apt not to push if a doctor is involved. What do you think?

BTW, I am around these types too, but my willpower is not as strong as yours. I applaude your determination.

Heidi
__________________
doIlookfat? is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 03:30 PM   #3
Can't Never Did Nothin'
 
Catmint's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Atlanta GA
Posts: 54

S/C/G: 212/166/140

Height: 5'6"

Default

Heidi, you stole my response! That's exactly what I would say. You can even add something like "Maybe next time we're eating dinner together I'll be finished with my program and I can have a bite."
__________________
Spring Break Challenge (April 1)
Catmint is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 03:30 PM   #4
Maintaining :)
 
CountingDown's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Michigan
Posts: 4,752

S/C/G: 215/117/120

Height: 5'4"

Default

The second time they ask:

"You are so sweet for making sure that I am taken care of! But, I really don't care for any. If I change my mind, I will be sure to let you know. Thank you for respecting my decision. I have been places where people just PUSH food on me. Thank heaven's you aren't one of those folk." (smile coyly)

They don't come back
__________________

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, which you have from God, and that you are not your own? ICor 6:19
My Pictorial Journey " " My Goal Story
CountingDown is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 03:32 PM   #5
Just Yr Everyday Chick
 
JayEll's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Florida
Posts: 10,085

S/C/G: Lost 50 lbs, regained some

Height: 5'3"

Default

What I do, by the third or fourth time, is turn it around into a question for the person pushing the food. For example, "Why is it so important to you that I eat that XX?" or, "Why are you insisting that I have that food when I've told you No already?" or, "I guess you didn't hear me when I said No all those other times." or, "You must really want to get rid of that XX because this is the fourth time you've tried to get me to eat it."

In other words, put the spotlight where it belongs, on THEIR behavior, instead of having it focused on you because you keep saying No. You don't have to say any of those responses in a loud or belligerent way--in fact, you can smile and be pleasant about it.

I'd practically guarantee that if you say one of these, you won't get asked a fourth or fifth time for that food.

Jay
__________________
"My religion is kindness." --His Holiness the Dalai Lama

JayEll is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 03:33 PM   #6
Junior Member
 
RedPhoenix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 28

S/C/G: 224/165/160

Height: 4'11& 3/4 inches

Default

I always say I've just finished eating.My in-laws try to push food on people,once they went as far a fixing my husband a plate and TELLING him to eat.They put a plate in front of me once and I just acted like it wasn't there(I'd said "no" 3times already).It urks me too...I don't force my kids to eat either;only YOU know if you're hungry and only YOU should be deciding what goes in your body and when...
__________________
RedPhoenix is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 03:38 PM   #7
Senior Member
 
sharonrr1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: central wisconsin
Posts: 325

S/C/G: 34% b.f./31.1%/25%

Height: 5'7"

Default

I am downright rude. I don't believe anyone has any right to push their food on me. They don't know where I'm coming from. I also can't stand it when someone says,"She doesn't eat that, she's on a diet." I quickly respond."No I'm not on a diet I choose not to put that garbage in my body."
"Thank you"
sharonrr1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 03:51 PM   #8
3 + years maintaining
 
rockinrobin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 12,070

S/C/G: 287/120's

Height: 5 foot nuthin'

Default

I don't feel the need to tell anyone I'm on a special "diet" or anything like that. It's no one's business what or why I'm eating or not eating something.

I just say "no thank you" as many times as I need to.

Although I have had people, many, MANY people respond to me, that "Oh, you're probably not ALLOWED to eat XXX." And Then I get a little nuts and say something like, "What do you mean not ALLOWED to, I CHOOSE not to eat XXX." Not allowed to? What kind of nonsense is that? I'm an adult for goodness sakes, I CHOOSE what I want to eat and not eat. See, there I am getting all nuts.

In this day and age, with the focus on health, I don't think anyone should feel insulted if someone doesn't want to eat a particular item. And if they are that's their problem. They need to get over themselves.

I do like Jay's line of thinking though, I must say.
rockinrobin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 03:56 PM   #9
I AM healthy!
 
Jasmine31's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Mt
Posts: 2,094

S/C/G: 270/178.6/135

Height: 5'4

Default

I need to try some of these. V~day I was at See's getting chocolate for my dh and they offered me a sample, I said no. By the second time the same guy offered me a sample without thinking I took it and ate it! Arrrghhh!!! I didn't even like that particular piece!
__________________


Jasmine31 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 04:37 PM   #10
Senior Member
 
horsey's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: USA
Posts: 1,095

S/C/G: 200/190/165

Height: 5'9

Default

A client took me to breakfast a few weeks ago. I had oatmeal and fruit, and I kept getting questioned. I went on and on about I have a birthday coming up, I'm on a diet, and truth is it's NOBODY'S BUSINESS. Why is it NOT OK to skip the skillets that made me fat to begin with? What's wrong with oatmeal. Next time I'm not going to explain myself.
horsey is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 05:07 PM   #11
Just Yr Everyday Chick
 
JayEll's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Florida
Posts: 10,085

S/C/G: Lost 50 lbs, regained some

Height: 5'3"

Default

NO ONE has to explain their food choices to ANYONE. Period.

A 3FC member also once suggested, "Tell you what--you look at your plate and I'll look at mine."

This wouldn't be the thing to say at a business breakfast, but if necessary one can always say, "Oh, I'm never very hungry in the morning, and I've found that this is the best thing for me to eat." No one can argue with that!

Jay
__________________
"My religion is kindness." --His Holiness the Dalai Lama

JayEll is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 05:22 PM   #12
Senior Member
 
horsey's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: USA
Posts: 1,095

S/C/G: 200/190/165

Height: 5'9

Default

"I'm not very hungry." PERIOD.
horsey is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 05:31 PM   #13
No more fake foods!
 
PurdueGal's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Indiana
Posts: 135

S/C/G: 190/ticker/140

Height: 5'6"

Default

I hate it when this happens too. The other day I was at the mall with one of my friends and we walked past the Japanese restaurant where an employee is always handing free samples to passerby. My friend stopped and took one, and I politely declined the offer. But the guy kept pushing it- "Here! Here! Try one!" I started to walk away and MY FRIEND joined him by saying "Oh come on, try one!" No means no. I just kept walking away and I hear my friend say to the guy, "She's a baby."
What a friend. I felt like slapping her. :P

But all I can ever do is just say, "No thanks," and leave that situation if I can. (Like walking away or turning to talk to someone else.)
__________________
PurdueGal is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 06:03 PM   #14
Rosebud
 
Justwant2Bhealthy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 6,945

S/C/G: 30/Goal Met:L-XL/relosing some

Default

How about 'NO THANKS, I'M NOT HUNGRY RIGHT NOW', then just turn and walk away. I also have used the 'NO THANKS, I JUST ATE' comment many times; and I really like COUNTING'S clever answer ...

Someone once suggested to say 'WHAT PART OF THE WORD 'NO' DIDN'T YOU UNDERSTAND? THE 'N' OR THE 'O'? Then leave. LOL! But, that may sound too harsh in some circumstances (ie you wouldn't want to offend your boss).

ROSEBUD
__________________
ONE-STEP-AT-A-TIME PHIL 4:13 " I CAN "
YA GOTTA HAVE FAITH KEEP ON, KEEPIN' ON
= 10 lbs ...
115 lbs + 16 Single Sizes Gone Forever! -- 100 lb tumor = ONEDERLAND!
Progress Pics: http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/look...ml#post4361876
Justwant2Bhealthy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2008, 06:06 PM   #15
Ilene the Bean
 
Ilene's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Ontario Canada
Posts: 11,771

S/C/G: 165/149/140

Height: 5'3"

Default

I just answer: "I REALLY am STUFFED, couldn't eat another bite."
__________________
I l e n e
Falling down is not failure....Failure is staying down.

Ilene is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Posts by members, moderators and admins are not considered medical advice
and no guarantee is made against accuracy.


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:00 AM.






Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.3.2