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Old 12-17-2007, 12:47 PM   #16
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This is so hard, but I'm glad this topic is here.

At my highest weight (even with my tWO Masters degrees and oodles of work experience) I was only able to get jobs as secretaries or some other kind of support worker. A job I applied for sixty pounds ago didn't even bother calling to let me know they had filled the position. Flash forward to now. THAT SAME job came back on the market and I applied and got it ON THE SPOT and for 7,500 more than what they planned to offer me before. (keep in mind, same qualifications, education, etc.) I was poised, prepared and positive in the interview sixty pounds ago, but now I appeared to be a "better fit". In fact the same HR person interviewed me.

That was weird and exciting.

Guys chat me up a lot more and women seem super interested in being friends with me. I can't always tell what's just me being more comfotable or the weight being gone. I was always pretty comfortable with myself and felt I deserved to have love, success and all that kind of stuff in my life.

maybe finally the rest of the world agrees with me.
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Old 12-17-2007, 08:49 PM   #17
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Awesome and inspiring stories guys, would love to hear more!
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Old 12-18-2007, 04:42 PM   #18
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It's a bit circular - do I get treated differently because I'm thin, or am I treated differently because I feel better about myself? I'm happier, more confident, smile more, dress nicer. Was it the weight loss or the confidence boost that people react to?
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Old 12-18-2007, 07:21 PM   #19
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This is so inspiring! Unfortunately, the people I work with and most of my friends are too "professional" to talk about weight--they don't want to seem unintellectual or something. But they've got to notice the weight loss? People I don't see often don't recognize me and people say I look good, then compliment my hair or outfits or something.

But I feel better about myself and that's what matters. I wear dresses that go above my knees again (only with tights, but still). And I feel more inspired to wear make-up and dress up. I no longer feel like hiding when I have to lecture because I "know" the students are only noticing how fat I am...
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Old 12-18-2007, 08:01 PM   #20
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I work in an academic setting and have had a surprising number of people comment on my weight loss -- faculty and students alike. But it didn't start until I'd lost a substantial amount of weight! Others have never said a word -- and I've lost 120 pounds! So, it varies, as I'm sure they've all noticed! I have even had to re-introduce to people I knew just briefly when I started this weight loss process because they don't recognize me.

I used to hate turning my 300-pound backside toward the chalkboard to write something down... there's no way I could hide that...
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Old 12-19-2007, 02:57 AM   #21
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I've talked to people who've had gastric-bypass surgery. To a person they talk about how people look at you differently after losing a lot of weight. That part really stuck with me. Part of me, the part with a charitable view of humankind doesn't want to believe that's the case at all. But the realist in me knows those words are true. However, that being looked on more favorably will only justify if not reinforce my cynical view of society and those in it. It's a huge sticking point with me. It wouldn't prevent me from getting the Lap-band. But it would most certainly temper my view of any compliments I might receive afterwards.
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Old 12-19-2007, 08:00 AM   #22
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sandman47,

Jay
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Old 12-19-2007, 12:29 PM   #23
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Thank you JayEll!


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Old 12-19-2007, 12:51 PM   #24
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The only difference in how i feel like i am being treated after losing alot of weight is the unwanted attention from the guys in the office. Once in a while compliment is fine, but now it's every single day. One likes to kiss my on the head or cheek every single day. I know he doesn't mean anything harrassing by it...but it is still annoying. I find myself some days trying to be really busy or out of reach. (he's an older guy and married and really nice and sweet and so i don't take anything sexual out of it...it's just annoying. And seems like it started with my weightloss).
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Old 12-19-2007, 02:22 PM   #25
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lumifan, would I steer you wrong? And so, let me just say, you need to take Mr. Lips aside and say, seriously but kindly, "I want you to stop that. Enough is enough." Because until you do, he won't stop. And, if he doesn't stop, you'll need to say something to your supervisor. Unwanted physical contact is sexual, whether you think he's happily married or not. This is sexual harrassment.

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Old 12-19-2007, 02:36 PM   #26
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Jay is right. What makes something sexual harassment is not the harasser's intentions but the harasee's feelings about the behavior. In other words, if it makes you uncomfortable, it is sexual harassment, regardless of whether or not the man thinks he's sexually harassing you.The best thing to do is to politely ask him to stop and to tell him that it makes you uncomfortable.
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Old 12-19-2007, 02:56 PM   #27
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I agree. It can be tough asking some one to stop, but if it makes you uncomfortable, then it isn't appropriate.
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Old 12-19-2007, 03:02 PM   #28
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As someone who just went through state-mandated sexual harrassment training at work, any activity that a reasonable woman would believe to be sexual in nature, and which makes the person receiving it uncomfortable, is sexual harrassment. Also, if one of your other coworkers saw this man touching you or whatever, and that made THAT person uncomfortable, that would ALSO be harrassment.

In other words, you can tell dirty jokes and grope eachother in the break room if no one in the group is offended by it, and that ISN'T sexual harrassment. But if someone is next door and overhears one of the dirty jokes, and that makes THEM uncomfortable, it is harrassment.
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Old 12-19-2007, 11:05 PM   #29
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I caused a lot of panic attacks, anxiety, and jealousy. It was all a bunch of mixed feelings altogether.
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Old 12-19-2007, 11:27 PM   #30
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Quote:
Originally Posted by veggielover View Post
I caused a lot of panic attacks, anxiety, and jealousy. It was all a bunch of mixed feelings altogether.
Haha...panic attacks??? I need more details...lol.
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