Here's an irony.

I deliberately have kept off the scales for about 2 weeks now. I have switched to a healthier diet in general - not perfect but certainly better - with the main improvement being that I've gone from being in a place where I was bingeing most days and had put on about 10lbs in a few weeks (was surprised, but I did the math, and guess what...you CANNOT overeat by 1,000cals a day and stay the same! Well, blow me down!...Im lucky I didnt get fatter than I did, to be honest.)..

..to a place where I've only had, what, 2 binges in a fortnight, and they've been under 2,000 cals and featuring healthier foods.

But I really, really, want to know what I weigh. I'm TERRIFIED its gone up since I stopped looking - illogical, because I've been eating better and so forth - but the not knowing is bugging me, but whatever I am its never right, and whatever I weigh I cant do any better than what I'm now doing, so if I get on there and I've gained, I feel like I have no room for more restriction right now, so...

:-( I'm so sad of this constant...idiocy. If im not weighing I tend to eat better and binge less, but the not knowing kills me, daily. On other hand, if I *know* I do all kindsa funky things like binge if I'm depressed over gaining, or having *treat binges* if Ive lost....

help

Oh, Em - I'm so sorry to read that you are down and struggling a little bit. And it IS only a 'little bit', in the whole grand scheme of how well you've done, how determined you've been to conquer some of your past habits, and the weight you've lost.

It doesn't matter what the scale SAYS - if the not knowing is killing you, get on it. Tell yourself you'll weigh tomorrow morning, when you get up. There's a goal, and no matter what it says, that's a new jumping off place for you to start... after all - TWO WEEKS without weighing?? That's really something!

So - dust yourself off, don't weigh today (my scale is always friendlier first thing in the morning!) and take a quiet moment today to try patting yourself on the back for all you've done so far, instead of beating yourself about the head... I know, I know - easier said than done. But look! I've given you a pat already - yours will be easier now - go on... do it now. "I am strong, and smart, and I have come so far already. *I* am in control of the food that goes into my mouth, NOT food controlling me!" Say it... say it...

I am thinking of you - and let me know how you get on. *I* think you are amazing.

Heather

Gosh, Cousin, you're obsessed when you do and obsessed when you don't! How maddening.

Look, here's an idea. I want you to make a sign and hang it in your bathroom. This is what is says:

YOU WEIGH 49 POUNDS ON MARS

Read it every morning and every time you want to weigh yourself.

Jay

Emily - congratulations on taking such good steps! Because ultimately finding a healthy place is the goal.

Its like an addiction, the longer you can go without weighing the easier it will be. Give your scale away. Pack it in the attic. Get rid of the temptation just like you would get rid of trigger food.

(If it wasn't meant to be funny then everyone please excuse my humor)

LOL I found the Mars suggestion funny.

The MADDENING thing is, I havnt been overweight, even, for FIVE YEARS. AND IM STILL DOING THIS CRAPOLA!

Scales can kiss my a$$...you would have thought that I'd have better things to think about ..exams/job/people/possible relationship...actually maybe thats WHY im just funnelling angst into the scale thing more than usual? have to look into that one.

Thank you so much for all your wonderful support, guys..as ever, you're brilliant
xxx

Just remember that eating healthier is better for you regardless of what the scale says. Are you retaining water?

Re: 49 lbs on Mars. Yes, it's funny--but it also takes the mind to a different perspective!

Jay

Nah..I don't really retain water or get TOM weight because I tricycle the BC pill (due to epilepsy meds...long boring story lol) to get a period every 3 months.

I'm okay, I'm not weighing...this'll be alright.

xxx

Okay *hugz*

Hang in there! If you want to weigh yourself, I say go for it, and then come back and blog about it on 3fatchicks to get it out of your system. If you don't want to weigh yourself at this time, then I suggest stick to whatever meal plan you have developed for yourself to lose weight-- and get a kick-*** workout system in place. Spend some time doing both the meal plan and your workout, and then weigh yourself