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Alternative Group (January 11, 2002)

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Old 01-11-2002, 12:10 PM   #1
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Smile Alternative Group (January 11, 2002)

We are a group of non-traditional lifestyle individuals. We are partnered, single, widowed, Pagan, Atheist, Agnostic, Christian, Muslim, gay, bi-sexual, bi-colored and straight. We bask in our diversity and unite in the same goal of losing weight. If you are relatively open-minded and accepting of ALL walks of life, please join us.
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Old 01-11-2002, 12:12 PM   #2
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Hey chicks. I'm home at lunchtime and only have a minute. I'll sum it up...

I can't stop eating when and what I'm not supposed to...

My divorce appears to be right around the corner...

I finally walked last night...

Why can't I stop cheating on this fast?
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Old 01-11-2002, 12:41 PM   #3
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Welllll......... You are a mammal.... and mammals like to eat!

I did a tarot reading yesterday and today and the wildest results. The same 4 cards both days... I'm totally freaked out. A solid message though! Lots of movement towards change.

On program, drinking water and walking.

Have a good day everyone!!

And a great weekend! Although I'll be back and forth over the weekend. It's warm and sunny here, really bizarre weather for southern Ontario.

Having pasta tonight, with a giant salad and red swiss chard.

Bye!
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Old 01-11-2002, 01:26 PM   #4
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Ruthie ~ You are most likely not getting what you need nutritionally out of this fast... You're a put together woman; you know what you need (in all aspects of life) so you need to make the rational decision where this is concerned... Is it what is best for your body? You can't be getting everything you need in 800 calories per day (you have looked at the nutritional content of this liquid=sugar) and you feeling the need to eat is you body tell you that. I am not telling you what to do but this is 2 weeks on right? Maybe you should re-evaluate your decision.

Nursing process:
Assess the situation
Diagnose the need
Plan/make goals the best you can
Implement the plan
Evaluation (from the eval have you met the goal?)
Re-assess
Wash/rinse/repeat

Ultimately you have to make the decision what is best for you. You can't feel pressured to stick to a decision because your worried about what others are going to perceive as a failure (your sister).... So in my opinion you need to re-evaluate your plan and move forward. You know you have (I speak for everyone here) all of our support, for what good that is!

Flower ~ Sorry I haven't responded to your situation (completely swamped in Alabama)... Your doing the best you can, kids are going to push the limits and see what they can get away with, some get caught (the lucky ones who have to face consequences) and some who don't- who continue to push the limits until they do get caught. You are doing everything right, don't stress! How are things with the Rio?

Guys! I have got to get OP! I am so stressed about school already that food is the natural thing to turn to, I have my grocery list, sticking to it and going to try really hard this week! I am seeing the gain... I am glad I got rid of most of my bigger clothes, I would be tempted to just go up a size instead of getting back on the wagon so to speak. I can NOT gain my weight back, this isn't an option! SO, I am starting back OP today!!! I have eaten bad alllllll week (Dairy Queen two days this week, mmm it was good)

Went for orientation for the Children’s hospital last night.. I start next Friday doing on the floor orientation. This past month they hired 5 out of 8 of their graduates from their student nursing pool so, this is what I think I want to do- I am really excited! They have also asked me to teach a Supplemental Instruction class for the incoming class at school (I would get paid, I just don't know if I am capable)... I have got to run.... If my house work is any indication of what this next year is going to be like I am going to have to get a maid service ...

Hugs to all!
Amy
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Old 01-11-2002, 04:12 PM   #5
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Grrrrr! I just feel huge today.... I hope I am just PMS'ing!!!
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Old 01-11-2002, 08:24 PM   #6
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Ruthie, removing all food from your life is a hard thing to adjust to. You may be satisfying your hunger needs, but the other qualities of food...taste, smell, texture...you're missing. Could that be part of why you're supplementing with food? I know there are times I eat because I want something salty/sweet/crunchy/gooey. Not because I need food for hunger's sake. Really, food is such a big part of our lives, especially as people who are trying to alter our lifestyles and long-bred habits. I think our connection to food is way deeper than just filling the hunger void. I think Amy is right, you need to see if your heart is really in maintaining the fast, and do you want to continue to battle it out. You've mentioned the cost of this program, and you also mentioned that perhaps Slim Fast would be an option if the fast didn't work out. So, you do have some options if Opti-Fast isn't working for you. Don't think for one second that you've failed if you decide to change your program. You have to do what is best for your body in the long run. You're much braver than I....I couldn't even attempt such a fast. What about doing the program but not the full fast? I know just how you feel about wanting the weight gone and NOW and feeling that you're somehow on hold until it is gone. It's frustrating as ****. But we don't want you to do anything that is upsetting you, either. Whatever you might decide, we're behind you!

Lamorgan, hope that movement towards change is a positive move! Isn't this weather incredible? I can't believe we still have green grass in the middle of January!

Wow, Amy...sounds like things are coming together for you....starting at the children's hospital, teaching a class...you go, girl! I'm struggling this week, too. I'll do fine for half a day, then blow it in the evening. Gotta get back up, dust yourself off, start all over again!

I just booked a flight to Montreal for Feb 2-5. Going with a friend to a medical conference...though I'll be mostly enjoying some time away while he's rubbing elbows with big wigs. Something to look forward to in the dreary days of February!
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Old 01-12-2002, 06:02 AM   #7
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Hey chicks. Amy, I love your professional approach to my problem! Is there anything better than putting into practice things you learn in school? I love it! Wildfire, I thank you too. However, I'm still more mad at myself than anything. BTW, I have already modified the fast -- I'm doing a version of the fast that's still under 1,000 calories a day, but lets me eat one meal, so it's four shakes and a meal. I just can't stop snacking -- snacking sometimes to the point of bingeing. I just have to find the ... the ... thing inside me that will make me stay OP! How long have I been on this board? And I haven't in all that time been able to stick with a program. When I go to the group next Tuesday, I definitely want to talk with the group about these issues, not world politics or everyone's general feelings.

All right, I veered off there, but the point I'm trying to make is that it doesn't matter that right now I'm doing a modified fast. The point is that I haven't been able to stick to ANY program since I decided to lose weight, and therefore have stayed at about the same weight for two years. It doesn't make sense, because I am a very determined person, and when I set my mind to something I usually achieve it...twice I had the courage to leave bad marriages, the first time at peril of my well-being; I am finishing school, finally; I quit smoking; I am making plans to move on and achieve some career dreams; etc., etc. I just can't lick this eating thing. Sometimes I think it's because I took away every other pleasure: I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do drugs, I don't fool around. It's like eating is all that's left. The sick thing is that my cheating really does have the feeling of a binge -- I enjoy the sneaking, and the hiding, and the knowledge that I'm not "supposed to." I enjoy those things possibly more than the food itself. I barely taste the food. It's something I used to do when I was a teenager. I think I definitely need to bring it to the group -- that's what I'm paying for, after all.

Lamorgan and Amy, you both sound like you're heading in great directions! Wildfire, the Montreal conference sounds like fun -- I have always wanted to visit Montreal, just never made it there. Believe it or not, as much as I've traveled, I've never set foot in Canada! Isn't that crazy?

Well, tomorrow DD turns 18 . More craziness from my dysfunctional family, too...long story short, last year, as I mentioned, DD and I had the biggest fight of our lives on her birthday, b/c she wouldn't do anything with her family b/c she was too busy with her friends. She actually made the comment, well can't they just bring the presents over here? What a *****. We had such a big fight she actually left the house for a few days. It was a very painful incident, and I vowed never to plan anything for her birthday again. I was just aghast at her attitude, and of course b/c she's my DD I blamed myself to a certain extent. So this year I planned nothing for her birthday, even though the family tradition is to get together for dinner or at least cake for each other's birthdays. My sister asked me a few times about DD's birthday, and I told her, no I'm not planning anything b/c of last year. Well, a couple days ago DD told me she went directly to my mom about getting together, and my mom said ok, come to my house for brunch. So last night my sister called me to say that mom knew nothing about that, that as far as she knew we were going to a local restaurant for brunch, and that furthermore mom said, why would I have anyone over to my house when everyone complains that I get upset when I have people over? Which is in response to me and my sister trying to be nice to her b/c she does seem to get anxious when people come over, so we volunteered to do Thanksgiving at my house and Xmas at my sister's house. So my sister kept saying, where did DD get that idea? What's going on? And I felt kind of, I don't know, PMS'y, just wanted to be left alone and lay on the sofa last night, and my feeling was just, if it's at a restaurant, fine, now everybody just stop running your own agendas. So I just got off the phone with her without responding to anything she said. I'm tired of them and their negativity. My parents and my sister own stores that are next door to each other, so they're in each other's faces and in each other's business all day long. I don't want to get tangled up in their little dramas. As sad as it will be to move away from my very close-knit family, I'm glad I'm doing it. Life is too short to spend it dwelling on he said-she said stuff.

All right, I'll shut up now. Thanks for listening.
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Old 01-12-2002, 08:25 AM   #8
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Wow Ruthie! A lot on your mind these days, so many issues coming to a head... I come from a fairly close-knit family, one of 5 daughters, but the real what I consider crazy-makers all have died and although I miss them dearly, family functions are blissful now. Isn't that sick? Families are so complex, and as I watch my own reactions with my 14 year old and my 12 year old I catch myself spouting the same garbage my own mother did with me! Just keeps going around...

I haven't done any travelling in the U.S., and if and when the time comes and I have any money, I think I'll be exploring Eastern Canada and then branch out to Europe. I have a yearning to explore my ancient roots. (Ireland, Scotland and England)

Had 3 skinny slices of pizza (yummy feta and garlic!) last night for supper, they were well worth all the miserable points. Saturday is my heavy walking day, have to help 3rd child deliver flyers around our community. So I'll burn some of that pizza off, hopefully.

When it comes to change, I'm pretty sure most change is positive although I've been in a tricky situation with a friend these past 6 months and I've had to cut my involvement in her life down quite a bit, too much energy going her way and not enough left for me and mine. So I see the message about change to be regarding that situation. It's resolving slowly, and with care.

L
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Old 01-12-2002, 09:41 AM   #9
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Ruthie, next time you want to get away, come to Canada!!! You're really not that far from me. Lots to do in Toronto! I've been trying to figure out the very same thing, Ruthie....everything else in my life I've overcome and this weight is really the last thing that I want to change, but just can't seem to do it. At New Year's, when I realized I'd been up and down the same 10 pounds for an entire year, I really beat myself up for it. That's just plain ridiculous...an entire year! What a waste. Just about every minute of every day I am completely aware of my weight and that I want to lose it, and how many points whatever I am eating would be. Sometimes it really drives me mad that I can't escape it. If you figure it all out, let me know, will you? I've done every little incentive thing I could think of....charts, journals, graphs, streaks....and here I am still at 175lbs. I started at 191.4, so at least I've kept that 16.4lbs off, but I'm not satisfied.

When I moved to Ontario 4.5years ago, I left behind a large extended family and friends. I had aunts, uncles, cousins, grandmother, my sister and her husband....all on the same street and the next two streets over, then more in the city, and more further out in the county. As difficult as it was to be in a strange place and starting all over on my own, it was great, too! Nobody calling me to gossip or stick their nose in my business, I could come and go as I pleased and there was no one to know where I was going or when I came home. I didn't have to worry about running into anyone I knew. It was really liberating. My grandmother and my sister called to check on me, but other than that I was detached from the family. My aunt and uncle here are the type that let you make your own decisions and run your own life, and I really appreciate them for that. They are on the other side of the family....maybe that's the difference. Anyway, my point is, Ruthie, that I think you will find the same thing, and enjoy the peace, and you can go back and visit with them on your own terms. Whatever ends up being the plan for your DD, go along and when it's over you can just leave. If it's at your mother's house then it's her decision to do it and if it upsets her, well...that's out of your control. If it's at a restaurant, which sounds like a better choice because you could excuse yourself easier, go for the brunch and pretend you are a friend of the family. Your daughter is 18, if she acts inappropriately or upsets anyone, it's on her, not you. She's an adult, and needs to be responsible for her own actions.

Lamorgan, if you've never been to the east coast, go! Although I'm biased, being from NS, there is NOTHING like the people and places of the east coast. Just be sure to include Cape Breton on that trip! If you ever decide to do it, I can help you out with some information. Hope the situation with your friend works itself out. You know, before I made the move to Ontario, I went to one of the locals who was famous for her readings. (tea leaves, not tarot). The things she knew about me and my family were incredible, and I'd never laid eyes on her before. She pointed out that I had the "gift" passed down to me from great aunts. (When I was born one of the aunts told my mother I would be next in the family to carry on the pagan traditions. My mother promptly had me baptized. ) I had no pagan jewellry on when I went to see her, so there was no way for her to know. She described our house and land, and things in the house. She told me that I would find work in the field I was studying, told me about my move to Ontario, (which I was already planning), but said if I went alone I would have nothing but hardships. She said there was a man in my life, and that if I made the move with him, things would turn out great. That baffled me, because there was no man in my life at the time. Ah, but I didn't know at that time that my hubby would be moving to Ontario and that we would get married. We were still chatting as friends online. She was really amazing....everything she told my sister and I has come true so far. Wish I could go back to see her again....there are things I want to know! I also read the tarot, but it's open to more interpretation. She was bang on. What a gift she has.

I did some research online last night for my Montreal trip. WOW! This hotel we're staying at is incredible!! It's the Fairmont Queen Elizabeth, right in the heart of downtown, very posh, and lots of museums, shopping, entertainment all within walking distance. I'm going to have a blast! The Queen herself has stayed at this hotel, and scads of celebrities. I'll probably drive you all nuts in the next few weeks, so I'll apologize now. I can't wait to go!!! Better brush up on my French.

Au revoir, mon amies....a demain!

Last edited by Wildfire : 01-12-2002 at 09:45 AM.
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Old 01-12-2002, 11:54 AM   #10
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Lucky you! Montreal. Sigh. I haven't been there for at least 14 years. Had much fun there when I was a teen with my girlfriend ~ being chased through the streets by strange Frenchmen... Ah. Those were the days.

I loved the West Coast, as long as they didn't know I was from Ontario, all was well. I have a draw to the ocean, didn't see salt water until I was 30, and really miss it now. Must be the tides.

But the East Coast next! Someday! John has been and calls it Canada's best kept secret.

To the weight issues: Did you women find that your metabolism seemed to come to a halt suddenly? Somewhere after my 3rd child, and I turned 30, I could no longer eat like I had in my 20s, and post-birth weight did not fall off like it had before. Add any other changes like quitting smoking or going on anti-depressants just compounds it all.

I was on Paxil for 8 or 9 months a few years ago, gained 30 pounds and didn't even care until I went off it and realized I was at my all-time high in my weight. Talk about depressing.

Oh well. Need to go and attack Foster and Evan's room. Scary stuff.

John and I are going out tonight to visit friends and play some Euchre. It'll be wonderful to get out and leave the kids. I'm needing a change of scenery.
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Old 01-12-2002, 12:02 PM   #11
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Ruthie-I hope you daughter has a safe, fun and peaceful birthday. (for your sake)

Lamorgan, Wildfire, Amy-hello. You all have your paltes so full!

I heard from Summer. She was coming to Vegas in Feb but I don't think it is happening anymore. I was looking forward to it. Her business is booming. Lots of horny ladies in her town! She joined back to WW. She is close to goal! I think she said 10 pounds.

Sorry, I haven't been around. My head is so full of crud. Sickness crud and thoughts crud. I had my interview at the Great Indoors yesterday. It went way well. I will be having my second interview on Mon or Tues. They will call early Monday morning. I had my magick shoelaces in my pocket for good luck. (Silly huh? But Chris and I have gotton every job we have interviewed for if we take these along) Witht he exception of the Rio. But that might still happen. The Great Indoors had sent me a no letter a couple weeks ago and now they like me, so go figure.

I will also be interviewing for visual display. I am a great florist but I am an even better visual designer. I am good at pulling the whole thing together. That position pays more too. Dress code is any combo of black and white. You can have pattern but it must be black or white. I own no black or white!!! Gray and cream yes, but black/white. Nope. She told me I would be starting next week if offered the job and plan on going for my drug test right after the next interview. I am not sure if that was suppose to be a heads up thing, but they can test me all they want. I don't do that kind of thing.

I have my {.} so my diet is out of wack. I am not overeatting, just not focusing on diet food. We played hard at the park yesterday. Vegas is gorgous this week. It is very Springy here. ~flower
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Old 01-13-2002, 02:45 PM   #12
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Talking hi there.......

hi there,
i found this site a few days ago... and man do i need it!
i started my plan on Jan 8th at 204#s and am now at 198!!!!!! I never thought id be so happy to weigh this much.... but im under the 200 mark, which is great.

I really need support and encouragement ( as we all do.) and thats why im here...
I was VERY!!!! excited about this thread.
i guess ill just start by telling you about myself...

I am 28 single...no kids, a veterinary tech/ assistant/receptionist...
very into animals , a vegetarian, an artist ( or at least i am on good self esteem days...on bad days im a schmuck w/ a paint brush lol) i am very into tarot card reading and was thrilled to see them mentioned here.... i used to read profesionally at a now closed pagan bookstore.

well....
thats a good start anyway,
looking forward to getting to know some of you....
i need all the friend in this fight i can muster!

blessings!!!

colene

we are what we repeatedly do. aristotle.
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Old 01-13-2002, 04:32 PM   #13
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Welcome Colene!!!! The more the merrier!

I am not gonna waste my quiet time on the computer-no one is home. Chris took them all to the playground to play kick ball! Yeah, gonna go do some me stuff! ~flower
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Old 01-13-2002, 08:32 PM   #14
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Hippiecol (Colene), welcome to our group! Sounds like you're off to a great start on your weight loss journey. What kind of program are you following? Counting calories, Weight Watchers, etc? Glad you joined us

Lamorgan, that draw to the ocean you described is in my blood. There are days it gnaws at the pit of my stomach, and the desire to be back home is overwhelming. Lake Ontario is the best substitute I have here, but it just isn't the same. Re: metabolism, I never noticed it suddenly changing. I gradually put weight on the first few years I had IBS because I was unable to go to the gym, take long walks, aerobic classes, etc., like I had been. That coupled with a failing marriage and comfort food, and I've been struggling ever since. I'm sure in there somewhere my metabolism did slow, though.

Flower, hope you're feeling better soon. Tell Summer we miss her, and hope she'll stop in sometime.

Ruthie, how did the birthday turn out?
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Old 01-14-2002, 11:08 PM   #15
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Was the site down again today? Something wrong with my computer? NO replies at all today? What's up?
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