[SakuraHime9892]

My mom's always been allowing me to eat junky, unhealthy, fatty foods. Sometimes she doesn't even give me a choice. When I was little she'd always let me eat around 3 or 4 full sized candy bars and a liter of soda. I don't put all of the blame on her for me being fat, I could have always started working out with my grandma (she's a health freak.)

Whenever we're in an elevator with neighbors, the first thing she asks me is "what do you want for dinner? How does Taco Bell sound?" It's humiliating sometimes. And now that I'm trying to eat right she keeps trying to feed me food that are more than 400 calories a serving (and these are tiny servings.) I don't think she understands what it's like to be an overweight teen in high school. She was anorexic back then and now she's paranoid I'm gonna do that too. No! She knows about my (ex) friend who was anorexic and how she almost died. I would never starve myself. Never!

I don't think she realizes that I'm taking classes on nutrition, I'm following the food pyramid, I'm drinking the right amount of water, I'm sleeping without sleep-aids, and I have more energy now. I'm old enough to make my own food choices, and I don't need her to keep driving the long way to go somewhere so we pass my favorite restaurant with the chicken that's fried and really good! I need to go to the grocery store with her so she doesn't buy crap. How can I get her to realize I know my body better than she does?

(Wow... I didn't realize how much I typed O.O; Sorry about that...)

[alinnell]

Take some time and sit down with your Mom and tell her just what you said here.

You are taking charge. You don't want to eat unhealthy food any longer. You're tired of being overweight and you'd appreciate some help in getting more healthy food into your diet. You know what anorexia can do you and you don't intend to go in that direction.

I'm a Mom. I know I'd love it if my DD sat down and talked with me like this (actually she does from time to time).

Perhaps suggest that you two sit down and plan out some meals for the week and then go shopping together. And then spend the time together to prepare the meals. It'll be a great bonding for you two.

Good luck to you!

[Sunnigummi]

Good job on your weightloss so far!!! Under those circumstances, you should give yourself a pat on the back!

To address the issue, I got the feeling that you're expecting her to read your mind when it comes to food. What I'm trying to say is that it doesn't look to me as though you have had a talk with your mom about this. Maybe the best thing to do is rehearse what you want to say (reminding her that she was an anorexic as one of your arguments might make her focus on that more) - emphasize those classes you're taking - and then pick a time when both of you are calm (if you do this when angry, you will lose track of your points) and calmly explain. Tell her you want to do this for you, to make yourself healthier for the long run. Tell her that diseases related to unhealthy foods is on the rise and that you want to prevent that. Maybe approaching it scientifically will quell her fears.

[bargoo]

Is it possible that Grandma could intervene with your Mom?

[Luxorbea]

I would say you need to find a way to get her involved with the positive changes you are making- share some interesting tidbits from your nutrition class. If you have a log of what you are eating, share that with her too.

As a mom, I know it is very easy to worry that your kids will make the same mistakes you did.

As a daughter, I know how frustrating it is to have someone think that just because THEY did something stupid, that YOU are going to do it too!

I just think communication is the key. I know you don't have anything to prove, and you really shouldn't have to convince her of anything, but I think it will go a lot smoother for you (and her) if you do what you can to keep her involved.

Next time she wants to go to a fast food restaurant, maybe suggest going to a different place? "Hey mom, do you think we could go to "X" instead? I hear they have some really great food that's much healthier for us" Maybe if she's more involved she'll be able to back off a bit.

In any case, hang in there!

[Janie Canuck]

The first question that came to my mind was "Is this more about your Mom's issues than yours?" If she was feeding you crap food from the time you were little, I'll venture that she's a bit of a junk-food junkie. Maybe she's afraid of losing her "eating buddy". Or perhaps seeing you eating healthy makes her feel more self-conscious or guilty about her own bad eating habits.

I think the message you typed here is basically what you need to tell your mom, but keep in mind that she might not be able to hear it, because of her own issues.

[redlight]

Ugh! Even if you were underweight, junk food isn't the answer.