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Do any of you think it's just not going to happen?

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Old 02-16-2007, 05:53 PM   #1
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Default Do any of you think it's just not going to happen?

I'm looking at all the weight I have to lose. Granted, it is not anywhere NEAR what some of you wonderful people have to lose or have done.

I can't look at the overall picture. It's too overwhelming for me. I just keep telling myself that I have to lose 5 lbs.

Even with that, sometimes it seems like those 5 lbs won't go away so I can greet their cousins (5 #).

At least I'm starting to get a little support at home. I think it really hit him hard when I told him that since I succeeded in giving up beef for Lent last year, this year I'm putting a bigger challenge on myself and giving up anything that walks on 4 legs. (I love hot and sour soup and won't be able to have it because it's partially made with pork ) I told him that I would be fixing separate meals for myself and he was welcomed to join me if he wished. I will be menu planning for the week just as we do now, but only for me. I think we'll be sharing the salads and veggies, but not the rest of it unless he wants more seafood.

But still, making those lbs go away is hard sometimes. Hopefully the trampoline place that I posted about in the exercise section will be something that will help as well as being fun for the 2 of us.
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Old 02-16-2007, 06:02 PM   #2
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I constantly think (briefly ) this won't happen, but then I think of what will happen if I give up -- I'll continue to gain weight and feel more hopeless, tired, depressed, etc. I'm going at it 10 pounds at a time, making little changes gradually and working on my exercise, binging, etc. And, like you, I keep looking at all the people on here who have done it, and more importantly the ones who have lost at least 2x as much as I want/need to and that's where I find my support.

Could you get your husband to eat what you do maybe two or three nights a week? I know something like that would make it easier for me than if he always got to eat something different than me. Besides, it would be so much healthier for him too!!
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Old 02-16-2007, 06:17 PM   #3
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I know it's going to happen.. I've come so far, and I'm not giving up now.

Are you getting enough protein? Sometimes it's hard to feel like you can't do something, if you're unhappy about doing it. Hungryness = unhappyness. At least in my opinion. I get grouchy when I'm hungry, lol.

You can do this! It's hard, but we're all here for you, we all believe in you.

Maybe it would help if you put up a ticker in your signature... just one that has 5 lbs on it, so that way you can see how close you are.

Also, putting up a smiley face or something for every 5 lbs lost is also a great motivator.
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Old 02-16-2007, 06:59 PM   #4
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oh yeah, at some level I dont believe in it. But then I think I dont need faith to keep on doing.
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Old 02-16-2007, 07:14 PM   #5
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I think we all feel that way from time to time. I know I have. Days like that are not easy, but that is when you should take the time and remind yourself why you are doing it, and who you are doing it for (you!!) and tell yourself that though it may be slow in coming, the end result will be worth it.
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Old 02-16-2007, 07:29 PM   #6
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I don't think I have felt that way this time. I knew I HAD to lose weight, and I decided that I would lose weight some how or another. I had decided that if I didn't lose, I would just keep trying until something worked. Once I started losing, it was easier to know that I could do it.
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Old 02-16-2007, 07:50 PM   #7
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Tammy, you are GREAT!!! Look at how much progress you have made!!



cbmare, I'm not sure what your goal is. Is it to lose weight or to become a vegetarian? You could do both, I guess, but it's like trying to do two hard things at once...

Yeah, I've been on this road since 2004, and I started and stopped and backed up and started again, etc. etc. Sometimes it seemed like it was impossible. But thinking that way does not help! In fact, it may throw a wrench in the works. This time I am following a plan, tracking what I do, and it IS working. And it will KEEP ON working as long as I keep up with my part of it.

You CAN do it! You CAN! YESSS!!! Keep going!

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Old 02-16-2007, 07:55 PM   #8
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I don't allow myself to think it's not going to happen. It will, period. Just like quitting smoking or finishing college, some things just must be.
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Old 02-16-2007, 08:02 PM   #9
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I thought that at first, maybe even for the first 50 pounds, because I've lost that much before and gained it all back plus some. I knew something "clicked" this time, but something has clicked before and then it just sort of turned off. I was really afraid that would happen this time too. I was like "well, here I go again...we'll see how long it lasts." The 110 pounds I needed to lose was incredibly daunting, but I just went for it. I'm 71 pounds in now, and I never really doubt it anymore. My life has changed. I'm a runner now (a novice, but still). I'm getting so close to my goal, and it really feels like it's just a matter of time. It took me a while to get to the point where I don't question it, and I suppose it could change (people gain back weight all the time, after all), but it just feels right this time.
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Old 02-16-2007, 08:34 PM   #10
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When I look at the big picture, I sometimes get discouraged because it seems I have so far to go. I'm about 1/3 of the way there, but then I look at the fact that I've lost 40 lbs. and that's enough to keep me going. We all will get where we need to be.

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Old 02-16-2007, 08:42 PM   #11
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When I first started trying to lose this weight, I had doubts if I could do it or not. With each lb . that came off the more sure I became that indeed I could do it. You can do it too. It takes persistence and drive but it's worth every bit of the hard work. I'm now 7 1/2 months of maintenance and still there are days that I can't believe i made it to goal, but I did. Good luck and I also just looked at it as having 10 lbs. to lose instead of the overall picture because 90 lbs. was very daunting.
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Old 02-16-2007, 09:06 PM   #12
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I definitely felt that way in the beginning. We had just joined a gym and I was so convinced I couldn't lose weight that I didn't even list it as one of my goals on the membership form. I just said I wanted to get healthier. But the staff at the gym just assumed I wanted to lose weight and they were so confident that I could. It really made me think about it. I remember sitting on the sofa with my SO later that night asking him if he thought it really would be possible for me to lose weight and actually feel good about the way I looked. I don't think I'd been happy with my weight since I was in grade school (or maybe the early junior high years, but I know by the time I hit 8th grade I was already trying to find clothes that disguised my shape). I simply could not imagine what it would feel like to look in the mirror and like what I see there.

But it turns out that it really is possible. And, at least for me, I didn't even have to give up meat; in fact, I think I eat more meat now than I did before. Lean protein is good for weight loss and I find that I actually like it more now. All I had to do was carefully monitor and limit my calories (which also meant cutting out high-fat foods, high-sugar foods, a lot of pasta, and a lot of baked goods). Add regular exercise to that, and the pounds started to come of; quite predictably even, until I got within 10 lbs of my goal weight.
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Old 02-17-2007, 04:26 AM   #13
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cbmare, I just noticed you have no ticker or stats under your name. Could you give us an idea as to where you are and where you want to be?

To tell you the truth when I started on this venture I had no doubt in my mind that I would do this. I had finally made the decision to lose the weight and not be fat. I finally figured out that my weight IS something I have control over and therefore I can change it. I also kind of looked at is a life or death/now or never situation due to my very high weight. The more I get into the new lifestyle, the stronger I feel about it. My determination keeps on increasing.

Now since I started out so much higher then most, again cbmare I haven't a clue as to where you are, I don't know exactly how close to my actual goal I can get. In fact I just raised my goal by 10 lbs because I was wondering if I could really and truly get to 125. Maybe I can, maybe I can't. So I just raised it to 135 because I think it is more obtainable then the 125.

But I'm doing this. I'm taking it all the way home. It's GOING to happen.

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Old 02-17-2007, 08:00 AM   #14
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I've been ruminating on this post for a while this morning (a bad sign because that means I'm gonna type something long and wandering).

My first thought is probably semantics ... it's not gonna happen, you have to do it.

Secondly, you need your husband's support less than you think. Go ahead and make dinner. Meat, potatos, vegetable, salad. Let them eat! You skip the potatos and have low fat dressing. You don't have to cook seperate meals.

I, too, would like to know how it's going for you. Are you talking about the first five pounds or the next five pounds? It definitely makes a difference.

If it's the next five ... you've done it once, you can do it again.

If it's the first ... stick with us honey, we'll help you. Tell us everything you eat and do on a typical day ... we'll tweak it.
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Old 02-17-2007, 09:39 AM   #15
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Hey MARE ~ I would suggest finding a way to "ease" your husband into the eating/meals routine you would like both of you to have.

When Angie and I got together, 12+ years ago, one of the biggest differences between us was our eating habits. I had been a divorced parent for about 6 years, now my ex-wife and I had the kids 50/50 but I saw them every day and usually was the one to get them fed. My kids were involved year round in sports, scouts, dance and church activities. It was all I could do sometimes to just get them fed between games and practices. Of course STUPID-STUPID me did a lot of the fast food thing OR when I could cook fed them high fat meals. Now in my defense people are not generally heavy in my family (other than medical reasons) so I was not used to "healthy" meals being a priority. My ex-wife, who was thin also, and I have our roots from the mid-west. So, we had a lot of hamburger dishes and casseroles, etc.

When I met Angie I had no idea someone could eat chicken NOT FRIED! Not only that, but to live in a house that didn't have a pantry full of chips, cookies, ding dongs, etc. I remember the first time Angie made me dinner, my plate had this chicken piece on it that was WHITE with nothing on it! some brown stuff (I learned later was brown rice) and some broccoli without any cheesy stuff on it! I was like WHAT! the is this? AND "WHERE IS THE REST OF MY FOOD!?"

I won't bother you anymore with details, but as the years went on and she progressed me into "her style" using "her tricks" I adapted and not only learned to eat that STUFF but how to cook it. When Angie and I met my kids were about 12 and 9...used to junk...several years later they would come in from school asking "who's cooking dinner?" if I said Angie, they would be "YES! chicken, rice and veggies!"

MARE, just use your magic tricks on the 'ol man and I suggest throwing away the scale for awhile and just FOCUSING on the eating/exercise plan that you have in mind ~ focus not so much on lost weight but the lifestyle change you are about to make ~ GET EXCITED about doing GOOD things for yourself!

You KNOW where your strenth comes from...this is a great time of year to focus in that direction.
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