For a long time, ever since I started dieting the first time, I had no interest in anything except dieting. When I failed my diet and gained all the weight back, I had no interest in anything but my failures. Then my boyfriend told me he liked me (before he was my boyfriend) and that cheered me up some.

It's been a long time and I'm back on my diet...and I'm trying to get into things that interest me...It's hard.

But all the time, ever since I moved to Florida when I was 11 (I'm now 16), it seems like everything is worse for me. I used to be happy, at least content in Virginia before I moved. But now everytime I turn around, at the end of the day I end up feeling pity for myself and crying all the time.

Whenever I feel rejected in my mind or someone isn't happy with me I go into my fantasies and no one cares about me in them. I have terrible self-esteem and low self-confidence. I thought I would be happy that I was back on my diet.

But it just seems that I have no emotions for anything at all. Sometimes someone will break through...but otherwise, nothing.

All I usually feel is sadness.

Is it hormones? Is it depression? I know I have abnormal anxiety...because if I'm not worried about dieting I have to find something else to worry about.

Why don't you talk to your parents about going to see a therapist? Even if it turns out that you're not depressed, everyone could use a visit to a good therapist every once in a while.

Hey Gamer,

As I recall from another post, you have kind of an unstable family situation? I'm not sure--sometimes I get people confused. heh. Anyway, hormones, stress at home and at school--it's tough! But if that feeling goes on too long, you could probably use some counseling. Talk to a trusted adult--maybe your school counselor would be a good place to start. Or some other counselor, minister, or therapist. You can get help--but you need to ask for it and look for it.

Don't let your self esteem ride on people telling you they like you, because that can change. And not everyone is going to like you. Think about the many good things about yourself--everyone has some! And don't dwell on the bad stuff, because that only reinforces those things.

Take care!
Jay

Gamerchick I am sorry that you are having these feelings. I believe it is a possibility that you may indeed be depressed. Only a qualified therapist can make the diagnosis. I don't know if what Jayell says is true about you having an unstable home or not. If not you need to talk to your mom. And if yes then like Jayell says you do need to find some adult to speak to. An aunt, cousin, teacher, counselor, neighbor, SOMEONE. Don't stop searching for the right someone until they listen to you and take you seriously and help you find the answers that you are looking for. There's no reason for you to walk around like this. You can get help and feel better and have the life you deserve. Good luck.

Hey Gamerchick, 16 is a tough age. I totally agree with Jayell and rockinrobin. You need to find an adult that will listen, and help you find help. I also remember your other post about your situation at home. The fact that you are so aware of how it affects you, well, seems like that would cause a lot of emotional termoil. Because of the other thread I would say a school counselor might be your first stop. Or if you have someone else, a friends mom, something like that. Even a local counseling center might be a good place to find. But you really have to be proactive about it. You have to take care of yourself. Don't wait to see if you'll feel better.
As for the boyfriend thing-like Jayell said, don't let other people determine your self-esteem. Your obviously a smart girl. You're figuring this out.

Teenageness is bloody well difficult. It *could* be just stress or hormones. However, the way you describe it, it sounds an awful lot like depression. Speaking as someone who's had depression since age 10, what you describe...sounds very familiar.

I would say, get thee to a counselor or therapist. If they diagnose you, you'll have options for treatment, and you can start doing things that will help you to live life more fully again. Even if they don't diagnose you with depression, counseling may help you adjust to whatever situations there may be in your life that are the cause of this stress.

The rule of thumb for figuring out if it's depression is the duration, by the way. If the symptoms of depression (crying a lot, unable to rouse interest in activities you used to enjoy, etc) last for more than three weeks (I think that's the "official" diagnosis criteria), then it's probably depression, not just hormones.

If you want someone to talk to about this stuff, feel free to PM me. I'm not too much older than you; I remember very vividly what it was like at 16. I hope you can find and get the help that you need.