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Old 12-26-2006, 06:49 AM   #1
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Unhappy I'm Giving Up!

No one said that dieting was easy, and no one ever said that exercising was either. I find them both equally hard. I tell myself that i will start my diet today, and i do. I limit my food intake at first, but then when the day is over, i have had more food then i had wanted to have. I am a compulsive eater. Some days i will eat only the equivilant of one meals worth of food, and other days i will eat enough food to feed ten starving people! I don't even realize i do it! How can you control something you do if you don't even realize your doing it until it's too late? I can only tell myself that i won't do it again, but i always do it again. I am tired of feeling so bad after i eat food!!!

I am a type-1 diabetic, so i rarely eat any sugar, and i have a limited amount of carbs. I try hard to go for the low-fat foods if i can help it, but when you have very little money, the foods that you WANT to have often can't be had. In a 2 week period, i have gained 10 pounds!!!!! That scares me!!!!

I'll admit that i don't exercise the way i should. I have many permanantly broken bones in my right lower leg, and the bones in my left leg are not structured correctly. I have been to the doctor, and multiple surgeries are needed to fix my problems, so that eliminates me from doing much running/jogging exercises, and i need to do some fat burning exercises before i do tone up exercises.

With all of these problems, i am thinking on just giving up on weight loss altogether!

I need some support and encouragment which i lack from my friends and family. If anyone can help me in that department, please do. I need all the help i can get! Thank you for reading this long post.
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Old 12-26-2006, 07:37 AM   #2
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tweetyand me, I can think of a few things that you could try that might help you in your struggles.

1. Track your foods in some way, but not necessarily to try to change anything. You say you don't realize what you've eaten--well, write everything down in a little notebook when you eat it, or use a computer tracker like FitDay. This is just to stay aware of what you eat when you eat it, rather than later when it's already in your body. Once you have this information, you can think about how to change it.

2. Type 1 diabetes makes things harder for sure. You'll want to check with your doctor about what kind of food plan and exercise plan would help you to lose weight, or at least not to gain weight. Perhaps seeing a nutritionist or dietitian would be a good idea too. If you've already done these things, then hopefully you have some information to work with.

3. Even with your leg problems, you can probably do a non-weight-bearing exercise like using a stationary bicycle, or your could find a YMCA that offers water aerobics classes. Having some small hand weights for working your upper body and arm muscles can help. If you can't afford buying weights, you can start with canned food! I'm serious.

4. I noticed you went from 190 to 159! That is so great! More than 30 pounds! Now is not the time to give up! I would be terrifically happy to weigh 159. Perhaps you could break your goal into intermediate goals, such as, make your next goal 150, which doesn't look so far away.

You might also want to look at posts in the "Dieting with Disabilities" section. You're not alone in this.

Hang in there!

Jay
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Old 12-26-2006, 08:52 AM   #3
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I agree with a lot of what JayEll said. You've come so far already (and I, too, would be ECSTATIC to weigh 159!)...don't forget about all the success you've had already just because you're a bit frustrated right now.

I hear you on the compulsive eating thing. I am very much a compulsive eater. If it is there, I will eat it whether I am hungry or not (and I will eat ALL of it, not just 1 serving ). To avoid this, I don't have it there! I have lots and lots of food in my kitchen, but it's 99% ingredients and not things I could just easily grab and eat on their own. Everything in my kitchen takes time and preparation before it's really edible/palatable, so it really makes me think about what I'm eating. If it takes me 20 minutes to put together a meal, then I'mmuch less likely to eat when I'm not hungry because even if I'm doing it mindlessly, that's 20 minutes for me to really get a grasp on what I'm doing before the food is even ready! This could also help with the budget since "ingredients" are generally much cheaper than convenient or prepared foods (I keep raw meat, cans of plain beans, uncooked rice and pasta, whole vegetables that require prep, etc.). I do have a few convenience foods, but not anything that would be very good alone without cooking up something else to go with it (for example, I have frozen brown rice that cooks up in 3 minutes, but I wouldn't eat it without some chicken or something to go with it).

As far as exercise goes, I understand why you think you need to lose fat before you can tone, but keep in mind that building muscle increases the number of calories you burn at rest (since muscle burns more calories than fat). Who cares if you can't see the muscles quite yet because they're still covered with a layer of fat? If you work them, they will work for you, and you can often even lose inches by doing strength training even if your scale isn't moving (and who wouldn't want to lose a few inches?). Heck, you may even find that with strength training added, you don't have to lose as much weight as you originally thought because you will be more solid and lean even at a higher weight. I know women who weigh over 300 pounds who regularly do strength training, and it has helped immensely! So don't think you have to wait--don't use that layer of fat as an excuse to let your muscles go!

Keep in mind, also, that this is a difficult time of year for just about everyone. It's no excuse to throw all caution to the wind, but we all struggle with the goodies and parties and whatnot this season. Maybe the new year will bring a better perspective and a bit of a fresh start for you as it does for many others
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Old 12-26-2006, 10:13 AM   #4
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First of all you have already lost 21 lbs. Way to go! You may not have support from family and friends but you have a wonderful support here on 3 fat chicks. People have posted alot of great ideas.

I just thought of one idea that may help. Clear out areas for yourself and put the foods that you are allowed to eat in those areas. That way if you are grabbing things to eat you can only eats stuff in your area.

Another idea is to fix meals ahead of time and freeze them. That way you will have more choices.

I was also wondering if you are able to walk about 20-30 mins. a day? Is there a mall or somewhere close by that you can walk inside for free?

Just don't give up. You've already invested a lot of time and energy into losing the first 21 lbs. You can do this.

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Old 12-26-2006, 10:40 AM   #5
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You can't give up! You've lost 20 pounds! You're DOING it.
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Old 12-26-2006, 11:45 AM   #6
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Even with your leg problems, you can probably do a non-weight-bearing exercise like using a stationary bicycle, or your could find a YMCA that offers water aerobics classes.
Just wanted to say amen to the water aerobics! They are such a fantabulous work out; when I get out of the water, my muscles feel like they got a good work out, but my joints don't hurt!! No knee or hip pain, etc. It's great.
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Old 12-26-2006, 01:35 PM   #7
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tweetyandme

Don't give up! You CAN do this and you are SO worth it! I can really relate to the "compulsive eater" statement you made. Food is my drug of choice. There are MANY other people who struggle with this. You are NOT alone! There is a forum here that deals with compulsive eating, bingeing, etc. with lots of wonderful and supportive people ...... "chicks in control" http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/chicks-control-64/

Good luck!
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Old 12-26-2006, 01:50 PM   #8
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So many good suggestions already.

Like telemetrynurse, food is my drug of choice as well. The bad thing about that is that we can't stop eating! One can stop drinking or doing heroin, but we can't stop eating. So, we have to manage our intake.

Let me add to the applause for your 21-pound loss so far! I can't wait until I've lost that much. It's HARD work. Whew.

As others have said, you are so worth the effort. Sometimes everyday is a struggle for me. I have to literally fight with myself to make the right choices. I am learning to become selfish, though. Not in a bad way. Just when it comes to eating. NO ONE will make my emotions flit about so much that I run to food. NO ONE is worth it. But I am worth making the right decisions so I can reach my goal.

You need to find a way to minimize your emotional triggers. I know - easier said than done. That's why it's a daily struggle for me.

YOu haven't been back to reply yet about walking, but if you can do some walking, I would highly suggest Leslie Sansone's in-home walking videos. They can be a God-send.
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Old 12-26-2006, 02:08 PM   #9
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I HATE, I mean hate, keeping a food journal. It's harder than avoiding Taco Bell and that's hard lol. But if you don't, you'll just keep going "off" and "on" a "diet" and that doesn't work, you know that. Eat it, write it down, note how you were feeling in that moment. Don't punish yourself for it, just observe.

I share my FitDay journal with a group of close friends. Talk about being super aware of what you're doing! lol

I am also a compulsive, mindless eater. Just a couple of ideas for you based on my personal experience:

-- Eat! I am honestly more concerned about the days when you're not eating than the ones where you overeat. (No wonder you/we overeat the next day!) Eat a GOOD breakfast, don't skip meals, eat snacks every couple of hours. Don't wait until you're starved to eat, you'll just make bad choices. The act of eating doesn't make you fat, everybody must eat. Starving-then-binging does because it messes up your metabolism and good.

-- Don't punish yourself for slip-ups. JUST observe them. But set small, achievable goals. If you start feeling defeated again, set them smaller. "I will lose 35 pounds by February" isn't a very good goal. "I will eat breakfast every day this week" is better.

-- It really isn't more expensive to eat healthy. More inconvenient, more planning, more preparation -- yes. I didn't believe this one at first but it can be done. Just wondering (I'm new, sorry) - do you live at home? Or do you buy your own groceries? I am sure you get get help here as to how to buy and choose food without breaking the bank.

Just a couple more thoughts -- next time you're at your doctor's, ask them about what physical activities would be safe for you. Non-impact cardiovascular activities MUST be possible, there are people in wheelchairs that participate in marathon races and they are superfit! Imagine the bravery of the first dude who ever dreamed up such a thing -- (s)he didn't take no for an answer, and how proud (s)he must feel. Overcoming obstacles just makes success all the more sweet. Honey, you can be fit. Believe it to your core because it's true! You're here, you're breathing, you can move (even if you don't use your legs!), so it's possible. I think there would be a whole lot of cheerleaders here on this forum, you just take the first step.

You're right -- it IS hard, if it weren't, everybody would be thin and fit, and Oprah would have bought it, right? But you CAN do it.
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Old 12-26-2006, 03:53 PM   #10
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Why not join us over on the Dieting with Diabetes area? (its under Dieting with Obstacles). There are other Type 1 diabetics who understand well what you are going through with diet, and can encourage you with the exercise. It sure has been an encouragement to me.
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Old 12-27-2006, 11:09 PM   #11
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Start thinking more positively - don't focus on your past struggles. This is a new year and it is your chance to CHANGE EVERYTHING. We are all mindless eaters by habit I think, so you have to really look at the circumstances surrounding your eating habits, instead of getting frustrated by them.

For example, if you have not planned out what you are going to eat for the day, then you will be left to face your environment and situations that occur throughout the day -- which often lead to mindless and random eating patterns. On bad days, really think about all the things that lead to your bad eating, what you can do differently to prevent the same thing from happening. Often you'll find that you skipped breakfast or something, which ended up making you so hungry you ate everything in sight (just an example).

While it sounds like a big change to have an eating plan before the day begins, it isn't. Your mind just plays tricks on you, making you think you can't do it. YOU CAN. And if you really want to lose the weight, it should become easy...and eventually it will become habit. Just try.

That doesn't always mean that you have to plan out every single meal out in advance, but it does mean that with a plan, you are in control. You have the options you have thought through ahead of time, so there is less random behavior. You eat when you are supposed to, and it helps manage your hunger...it works!

I know, sounds too good to be true, because it isn't THAT easy. It takes the true desire to achieve your ultimate goal, something that really is exciting for you. The uncertainty of whether it is worth it will be a tough obstacle, but the people here should give you the strength and faith that you can totally be at your goal by March or April.

Keep your chin up and get excited about what 2007 will bring!
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Old 12-29-2006, 06:46 AM   #12
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Ladies, thank you for your posts, and words of encouragement, they were much needed! I apologize for not getting back with ya'll sooner, the day after Christmas i was in the process of moving out of state. It has been very stressful. To answer some of your questions. i moved in with my mother and her boyfriend, so i am not the buyer of the food. We don't have much money, so we try to get the most for a buck, which isn't the healthiest food. It usuialy is potato chips, snack cakes, and sodas(of course my soads are diet because of my diabetes.) I can't go to the mall to walk around or the YMCA because where i have moved is in the middle of nowhere. It takes 30 minutes just to get to the nearest gas station! I don't drive, and my mom works from 4Am, to 8PM, so there goes my ride ANYWHERE. I guess i could do some walking, but the ground out here is so uneven and covered in fallen trees, and other things the would just make my leg injuries worse. I know it sounds like i am making excuses. I am trying to eat foods that will fill me up, but wont effect my weight much such as pickles, and tuna fish. I do slip up, like the night i moved in here, i had a whole bag of Doritos! I felt so bad when i was done, so much so that the empty bag haunted me in my dreams!
Added stress on me is that i miss my younger sister, my brother and my father. I don't feel comfortable here, and i see that i am turning to food to calm me down. I am going to refocus that comfort on my writing so that i can soon get my story published!
As for the weight, i think i am back up in the 170's! I should update that ASAP.
Thank you to all who posted!
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Old 12-29-2006, 07:55 AM   #13
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tweetyandme, it sounds like you are definitely in a tough place. Many obstacles. You make it sound impossible! But there is always a way, and you have to find it. There must be a road or driveway leading to your house that you could walk along, so you don't have to deal with fallen trees. I mean, that's kind of unreal! And even though you don't shop for the food, surely you can request some things. Potato chips, snack cakes, and sodas are no one's idea of good nutrition, and they aren't that cheap a way to eat, either. The cheapest way to eat is to buy fresh vegetables, and they are actually good to eat. I can't imagine what your mom does that she works from 4 am to 8 pm, but maybe you could take over some of the cooking to help her (and yourself!). Talk it over with her. I'm sure she would welcome some help and would want to help you as well.

I'm sure wishing you well with all my heart, and I'm hoping you can make some changes in your situation to get where you want to go!

Please keep us posted!

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Old 12-29-2006, 09:55 AM   #14
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Quote:
To answer some of your questions. i moved in with my mother and her boyfriend, so i am not the buyer of the food. We don't have much money, so we try to get the most for a buck, which isn't the healthiest food. It usuialy is potato chips, snack cakes, and sodas(of course my soads are diet because of my diabetes.)
Soda has absolutely zero nutritional value, a complete waste of money (no judgement there, I could be driving a mercedes by now if I had saved all the money I've spent). Chips and other prepackaged junk foods really are an incredibly expensive way to eat, I like Jay's advice about helping out with the cooking. A little planning and budgeting and you'd be surprised how much money you can save and how much better you can eat by getting rid of the junk in the house.

I keep a ton of fresh veggies on hand, and always egg beaters as well (you can put cartons in the freezer so you don't run out) -- every left over piece of meat or cheese or veggie pretty much turns into an omelet or big salad for me. I also use a crock pot quite a bit and just create soups and casseroles out of whatever's in the fridge.

Making sure you have strategies to eat all the fresh food you buy rather than waste it saves you a ton of money. One reason why there is a perception that all that prepackaged crap is cheaper is that it has a longer shelf life.

My grandparents raised 15 children and didn't have much money, my grandfather was a janitor. I was always shocked, I'd look in their fridge and all through their cupboards and see "nothing to eat." Then my grandmother would whip up a fantastic meal out of not sure what, or how she did it. She was the queen of the "hot dish" and could make a meal out of just about anything. They bought generic brands of certain foods, look on the "bottom shelf" for things like cereals and so forth.

Things like whole grain bread (it can be frozen too so you always have some on hand), whole grain pasta, brown rice, natural peanut butter, canned tuna and chicken, cereal, oatmeal, meal replacement bars, etc. can all live in your house for a long time. By creating a shopping list of 'staples' to keep on hand and a variety of meals that can be made with those, it can be done.

As for the walking around thing -- sometimes I just dance in place. lol I must look like a real crazy person but if nobody's watching, who cares? I actually can work up quite a good sweat with just me and some good tunes. Getting movement into your day will help you to manage your stress, you will find a way.

By the way you sound great for somebody that's going through so much, hang in there!! (((hugs)))
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Old 12-29-2006, 10:34 AM   #15
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I would agree with Akec in that eating junk food and sodas is a very expensive way to eat! For the price of a bag of doritos (that you mentioned), you could have an entire well balanced meal. I calculated the costs recently of each of DH's and my meals and each of them came under $2. I understand you are living in someone else's household and if they just buy junk and eat junk, it is difficult. You may need to figure a way to buy your own groceries and/or grown your own food. Are you working? Going to school? If you are going to school, maybe you could get a part time job. I understand transportation is limited but I figure if you are going to school, maybe they could use someone at the school part time? Who knows.
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