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Incredible Offensive Blog Post at MArie Claire

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Old 10-30-2010, 12:29 AM   #46
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Originally Posted by lazylioness View Post
You can cancel your subscription, that is not going to change a thing for their bottom line. You already paid your year. By continuing to give it attention, in some ways it is feeding the beast.
No, I don't think that's entirely true. I have never had a subscription of Marie Claire, I never intended to, and I don't think I'm the only one. I think I can safely say that there are quite a few people who have read that article who don't have subscriptions to cancel, just because they don't agree with it. The only reason I knew about it was because of this thread, so naturally I will share it with everyone I know, people who likewise don't have subscriptions... I think we get the idea.

Whether or not Marie Claire goes down or up in sales due to this, isn't really the point. What it boils down to is a question of "Is bad attention better than no attention?" and I don't think that question can be answered by any of us. Even if this controversy attracts attention, it's poor attention. Personally, I don't think the idea of "feeding the beast" really applies here.

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Old 10-30-2010, 04:07 PM   #47
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Update: Protesters!

http://blogs.wsj.com/speakeasy/2010/...ies-blog-post/
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Old 10-30-2010, 04:50 PM   #48
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I wasn't outraged, either. She stated her (understandable) opinion. I remember feeling too fat to go out and do certain things, and I wondered what people thought about me eating certain things when I was a certain size, but, guess what? I was unhealthy. I was engaging in self-destructive behaviour, and I hate to see anyone doing the same, whether its with food, weight, smoking, etc.

I also understand her apology. She was stating her opinion -- not calling names, not saying that obese people are a plague and deserve to die, etc. She made some very valid points. People were offended, in a way that she didn't expect them to, and she apologised. Maybe I'm dense, but I really don't understand why the article was so offensive. I'm not saying I agree with everything she said, but I think she made some valid points.

I'm also going to throw in something personal. People didn't seem to have a problem saying to my face how disgusting they thought I was when I was visibly too thin. When I was obese, maybe they thought the same thing but didn't say it, because it wasn't PC. Why is it OK to slam people for being too thin, but obesity is the thing everyone's supposed to gloss over and not kick up a fuss about? I don't understand that mentality. No, a person shouldn't be judged by their size, and people of any size should feel free to get out and do whatever they want to do! But what's so wrong about recognising the unhealthiness of both extremes of the weight spectrum?

I've heard people on this site (and even on this thread) saying that they hate seeing cookie-cutter slim people of all the same size in magazines. Maybe they feel the same way about seeing the morbidly obese on a day to day basis. Why is one viewpoint more valid than the other?
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Old 10-30-2010, 08:51 PM   #49
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you know.......some people, just do not now, nor will they ever, "get it".

~SIGH~

i have read and reread this stuff, and for me, i'm done letting this load of "&%^" take up anymore space in my head. i am officially bored with Miss Maura Kelly!
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Old 10-30-2010, 11:48 PM   #50
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I left this comment on their website:

Marie Clare, like virtually all women's magazines, gets women to buy their magazines by putting a pretty young woman on the cover. They have enticing statements like "how to lose ten pounds in two weeks!", "the perfect outfit for Fall!"; and "sex secrets he wishes you knew!" Every issue is the same exact thing, they try to convince you if only you would buy the advertised products and clothes, your life too would be just perfect!

What they really do is try and make women feel they are never quite good enough. I'm not surprised Maura Kelly had an eating disorder. I'm only surprised that more women don't have one. Yes, she is entitled to voice her opinion showing her hatred for fat people, but change fat to handicapped or mentally challenged, and see how quickly her opinions would have been quashed. Calling people out on being overweight is one of the last non-PC things you can still do in 2010. Her hatred of others is rather sad, she certainly isn't someone I'd care to know.
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Old 10-31-2010, 12:33 AM   #51
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Even changing the word to anorexic, would have been just as bad. Not every overweight person has an eating disorder (unless you consider obesity itself an eating disorder, which many people do), but a large number do - and I'm sure the author had just as much and just as little control over her anorexic thoughts and behavior. And it would be just as stupid and cruel to offer anorexic people the same level of oversimplistic advice "Just eat a sandwich..."

Disgusting is a powerful word to use. The author has the right to hate anyone she chooses, and to be disgusted by anyone she chooses, but it's horrific to have it supported by a national magazine (even if it is fashion and fluff).

I also have a very hard time believing the author battled an eating disorder (sounds more like she was trying to grasp at a plausible excuse that would mitigate her responsibility). If she had ever truly been bulimic or anorexic, she would have understood how horrific it is to feel as though people are secretly disgusted by your less-than-perfect body.

The post had a very powerful effect on me, and took me back to a place I didn't think I would ever visit again (hating myself for the unspeakable crime of existence).

I re-experienced the overwhelming paranoia that everyone who saw me were secretly disgusted, and could barely keep from vomitting at the sight of me.
It wasn't a good place to be 25 years ago, and it wasn't a good place to visit the last couple days.

I almost didn't go to a Halloween party tonight, because I'd let the post get too deep under my skin. I was afraid of facing possible disapproval and disgust of strangers (or worse friends).

I did go, and I'm so glad I did. I got a lot of compliments on my costume from friends AND strangers. I had a good time, and no one vomitted, not even when my fat husband and I held hands and kissed.
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Old 10-31-2010, 02:36 AM   #52
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I just don't understand (actually I do, but will come to that later) why being overweight is always just gross fatty-ness that all you have to do to change is change, yet anorexia is treated as a compulsion, a mental health disorder, you need to be free of the disorder before the weight will come back on.

This society correlates thin-ness with goodness, and more importantly anorexia is about having lots and lots of control so nobody can claim you are an out of control person with no morals or self-control, you have lots of self-control, which is a quality lauded as practically heavenly.

Yes, if you eat less and move more you will always lose weight, but the ability to do so is affected by so many things, and until you are ready to really, really change, to front up and say I can actually never, never again have what I had before and for the rest of my life I have to eat sensibly then the weight comes back on. Morbid obesity is a disorder of mental health too, and you succeed when you have all the pieces of the puzzle in place.

People act like they are morally superior if they resist a chocolate cake and you eat some. But there is no superiority in the fact they genuinely don't desire it and you crave it, they don't have more self-control, they just have less desire so less need to exercise that self-control. People who pride themselves in their resistance of a cake and then go and have a smoke really draw my displeasure. People have to remind themselves that if they are naturally slim they simply have a different mindset. There is no moral superiority in me not being having cigarettes, heroin, cocaine, alcohol, I just have no desire for them, I haven't resisted my cravings through excellent self-control, I just don't want any. It is a whole other level of control and self-change for someone who is an addict of those substances to pass them up, and the same for me to pass up chocolate when it's in front of my face. Those people who are obesity survivors are in a whole other place because they have had to get up every day and work at being slim, and those are the people who draw my congratulations at managing it, but if you don't want any then you aren't full of moral character not to eat any!

How someone who has been through an eating disorder and eating disorder recovery can still come and spout out this kind of remark that "all you have to do" is eat a certain way - that's all she had to do when she was underweight too!
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Old 10-31-2010, 02:39 AM   #53
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Originally Posted by kaplods View Post
I also have a very hard time believing the author battled an eating disorder (sounds more like she was trying to grasp at a plausible excuse that would mitigate her responsibility). If she had ever truly been bulimic or anorexic, she would have understood how horrific it is to feel as though people are secretly disgusted by your less-than-perfect body.
+1

Yes. This. Right here.

It isn't a black or white thing.

Just because she made "valid points" doesn't make what she said less offensive. That's implying that her umbrella statements housed every single person classed as overweight. Just because you are overweight doesn't mean you are unhealthy, and just because you are thin doesn't mean you are healthy.

It's not that I don't disagree with her that a good amount of willpower plays into weightloss, but it's not the only thing. That's not what angered me about the article. What angered me was the fact that she had the nerve to say a certain type of people should not be able to show affection. To me that is absolutely disgusting. A human being, no matter if they are thin, overweight, short, tall, black, white, their IQ number, their eye color, should be able to express their feelings in public.

Love doesn't have to be aesthetically pleasing. How about she puts that in her damn blog.
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Old 10-31-2010, 10:14 AM   #54
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A lot of anorexics justify their unhealthy behaviours by showing hatred towards people who are overweight. "I must be thin, because fat is disgusting".
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Old 10-31-2010, 04:17 PM   #55
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Originally Posted by fivestone View Post
I've heard people on this site (and even on this thread) saying that they hate seeing cookie-cutter slim people of all the same size in magazines. Maybe they feel the same way about seeing the morbidly obese on a day to day basis. Why is one viewpoint more valid than the other?
My issue with the cookie-cutter phenomena is partially about weight, but it was also about size in general. I am 5'11", large boned, and wear a women's size 12 shoe. Even when at my ideal weight, my sizes are often excluded from what's advertised in the typical fashion magazine. Most of the shoes sold in this magazine (and created by top designers) stop at a size 10 or 11. I would just like to see magazines that represent products that a broader section of the female population can buy, wear and look good in.

Last edited by Hyacinth : 10-31-2010 at 04:20 PM.
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Old 11-01-2010, 12:18 AM   #56
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Isn't Maura Kelly the blogger who recently wrote a sensationalist 'expose' article on health bloggers? Which completely misrepresented their attitudes to eating and exercise, making them appear as if they were nothing more than a fertile breeding ground for 'thinspiration'?

I think its simply her desire to make waves, the only way she can, crudely with an enormous splash of hyperbole!

Also..many of the supportive comments sound as if they are the work of internet trolls, especially, the one that states "all women should be 95lbs or less, regardless of height" I mean thats just too damn ridiculous to be taken seriously.
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Old 11-01-2010, 04:45 PM   #57
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I read it. The blog author's comments are rude and tacky and unnecessary to me but so are all the mean comments from repliers about the author's looks.
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Old 11-01-2010, 05:04 PM   #58
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If someone obese walking across the room grosses her out, I'd hate for her to see me do Zumba.

My problem with this article is that teenage girls (LOTS of girls) read Marie Claire. You aren't just offending a bunch of adults, but you're possibly REALLY screwing up a bunch of already insecure overweight teens.
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Old 11-09-2010, 10:42 PM   #59
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Weight is big problem in our country. Too many are overweight, but there's plenty of people, especially young women, who are underweight. Neither is good, neither is healthy. I think Maura Kelly still has a lot of issues stemming from her battle with anorexia. The original purpose of her blog was to highlight her search for a boyfriend. Maybe seeing to overweight people making out bothers her on more than one level, maybe seeing that fat people can be loved bugs her.

I happen to be obese and I'm married to a thin can't-gain-weight man. It's a bit like the Peter, Peter Pumpkin Eater poem.

I'm sad for Ms. Kelly, but Marie Claire asked for the blog, and have garnered tons of hits on their site due to the controversy. Perhaps some day, Ms. Kelly will learn to love herself more, and then learn to accept others the way they are without getting grossed out.
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Old 11-09-2010, 10:49 PM   #60
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Maybe seeing to overweight people making out bothers her on more than one level, maybe seeing that fat people can be loved bugs her.
Great insight! There's probably truth to that.
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