I am sitting here sipping on a celebratory 1/2 glass of wine. I went to & retained a lawyer this morning. Last year shortly after I moved out I went to see a lawyer that was recommended by a friend. I wasn't very happy with him and just left things sitting there. This one I like. This one is also female which helps!
Perhaps I should put a warning preamble here - I feel like babbling tonight and most is going to be about me!
Things are going well. I've now past the 8 1/2 months since I moved out. Because we didn't split for any of the 'big' reasons - abuse, etc., we have to go through a year separation. After that year, the divorce is granted with the separation as the reason. Today I met with the lawyer so we can start getting all the logistics out of the way. K & I still get along (for the most part) but I want this all over now. I am so tired of this hanging on and over my head. I haven't told him that I met with the lawyer so being served with the papers will come as a bit of a surprise to him I'm sure but I just need this over. So these papers and the next bit of wrangling will take care of all the logistics so when our year is up, all is taken care of and it's done. BTW, our 'year' date is 21 October. We will have been married for just over 6 years when the divorce goes thru.
Juno, you asked if I have any regrets. Not a one. I guess the only 1/2 regret I have is that I didn't do it sooner but then again, I would have missed that part of the journey and all has been a part of making me who I am now.
I had to smile tho, yes, my lifestyle change did have a big part in me leaving. The longer I'm out, the more I realize how true that is. When I started taking care of myself, I started taking control over my life back. The more control I took back, the more I realized I had given up. I don't think I would have had the personal strength to make the break and make it on my own if I hadn't started changing my life, taking care of myself again and making myself, my physical & mental health my priority.
The first couple months after I moved out were really rough. Not so much because I wanted to be back with him, because I didn't. There was just a lot of fear and uncertainty about being on my own again. Thankfully, between all of you (many thanks!!), friends and my family I was been blessed with a strong circle of support.
Now I am doing pretty good. I still get lonely at times but that's something I'm getting used to. I'm also getting out more and doing more things which I didn't feel free to do before. And it's the simple things that I'm enjoying - such as going to a friend's house for a bonfire. I have also noticed that I'm stronger in who I am and what I want. I am enjoying getting to know myself again! What is the phrase - I am woman, hear me roar!
Raychel, so what's up with the new job? I am assuming that you're taking it....... When do you start? I am so proud of you for going after this and doing so well.
Steph, thanks for the heads up on Cats & Dogs, I was debating seeing that next weekend. I'll find something else to see now
How soon is that one kid leaving? I'm glad that's worked out for you - & him.
Catherine, way to go on the 5 lbs!! Glad to hear all is going well with you.
Ah Juno, that fabulous 'no' word. Good on your for taking the weekend for you. I love those weekends altho they do tend to end to quickly!
I should quit babbling and get some stuff done around here. Take care!