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Old 04-10-2005, 12:26 PM   #1
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Thumbs up Sanctuary - #18 Everyone Welcome



What we really want in a weight loss support group, boils down to one concept; we are looking for a sanctuary.

Sanctuary means different things to different people. Sanctuary is a place of peace, rest, safety, and rejuvenation. It keeps our spirit and our sanity intact.

Many of us who have a long journey down the weight loss path find ourselves in need of a break. Sometimes our bodies crave it, and sometimes the choice isn't ours, but circumstances forces it upon us. Other times, we need the clamoring throng to cheer us along our way as we breeze past milestones and overcome obstacles.

Sanctuary can be all that as well. It is what you need and when you need it. Sanctuary can be found in good friends who aren’t afraid of your truths and in an open, honest atmosphere.

Sanctuary isn’t judgmental, neither does it discriminate or ask to be censured. It is open to anyone with a desire to share, and especially those in need of and willing to offer support
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Old 04-10-2005, 12:45 PM   #2
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Thanks for the birthday wishes. I had a good birthday, execpt I still have this sore throat.

After I post I am off to have some soup, Nyquil and a nap.

I have gotten so far behind on my Spring chores - I feel overwhelmed - but keep telling myself "if it gets done, it gets done".

BarbG: Loved the pop up guy!!!!

Gloria: I love your stories and you have the added bonus of getting into your "skinny" clothes. Congrats !!!!

Tricia: Don't be discouraged - remember you are my inspiration so keep going. It was good you checked out those pics and didn't let one picture ruin your progress.

Chelsea: Hope you are feeling better.

My high school best friend included a picture of us at 15 in my birthday present - I marveled at how small I was. The really sad part is that at that time I "felt" like I was fat. I sometimes think that I have eaten my way through the years into the size I always "thought" I was. The big question is why did I think I was fat in the first place????? I don't remember anyone telling me I was and I wasn't. I was 130 lbs most of my adult life, but I sure have always had that thought in my head that I was fat.

Okay, off for that soup and Nyquil.

We finally got much needed rain last night so I don't have to feel guilty about not raking!!!
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Old 04-10-2005, 01:59 PM   #3
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Well, girls, I think I've hit another plateau. Cripes. But, instead of obsessing this time I'm just going go and by the cheapest pair of size 10 jeans I can find. I'll just try them on once a week and that will be my goal instead of a number on the scale.

I've also decided it is time for another "starting over" state of mind. So, I sat down last night and mapped out a new routine. I've decided that I'll get up early Monday-Friday and do a walk/jog combo for half an hour. I'm going to try and work up to all jogging eventually. This way if something comes up and I don't get to the gym I can at least feel good about having done SOMETHING. I'm also meeting with one of the trainers this afternoon to get a new weight routine. Plus, I'm going to reduce my calories from 1500 to 1200/day. I'm still going to stagger them throughout the week, though. I'm also going to try and up my protein intake and cut out some of the refined carbs.

I think if I just do these things for a month or so it will give me the mental boost I need. I hoping to recapture the enthusiasm that we all have when we first get going. I am still enthusiastic about losing weight - but I am a little bored with the same old, same old.

Will tested for his orange belt yesterday. I swear, I was a nervous wreck and he couldn't not have been less concerned. I work VERY hard to make sure he doesn't pick up on my stress. There was one part that he had to do three times before he got it exactly right and the instructor had to count it out for him before he did. In his age group and at his level I don't think that is anything that would keep him from passing. Still, it could. Honestly, it isn't so much that I care if he passed or not - he can always try again next time. I just know how disappointed he will be if his name isn't on the list tomorrow. Everything in me wishes I could protect my kids from ever being disappointed - especially in themselves. But, besides being impossible, I know it wouldn't be fair to them either. They'll have to learn to roll with the punches sometimes. Ahhh, the joys of motherhood!

How is everyone else doing? Chelsea, are you feeling better? I hope so. Have you had to miss any of your sign language classes from being sick? Gloria, how is old Blue? And Sky? Find any great treasures lately? Lucky, how is your throat? I hate to have one - they make everything so hard to enjoy! I know exactly what you mean about looking back and seeing that you weren't the size you thought you were. I don't know how I will do it, but I am determined that Addie will have a more positive/realistic body image as she grows up. Will and Jake too, for that matter. And still to this day I will say things like, "I've struggled with my weight all of my life." Which is technically true. But I think I could be more forgiving of myself if I could accept that I wasn't fat back then and move on, focusing on changing how I am NOW. It is so overwhelming to carry this weight (no pun intended )on my shoulders from so many years ago. And silly to boot! Oh, well, just one more thing I should be working on. Hey, and don't sweat your spring cleaning - you should see MY house. And on top of cleaning we have a ton of projects that we need to get to - replacing a couple windows, filling in the backyard with extra dirt, painting the outside of the house - all of that fun stuff. I look at it this way. We have a roof over our heads, we are warm in the winter and cool in the summer. Anything past that we will get to as we can. We don't have the time, money, or energy to tackle it all at once.

I am off to the gym. I'm a little nervous to come back though. We had Jake's hair buzzed not long ago (he likes it that way, it doesn't look bad, and I don't have to fool with bed head!). Will has asked for the same cut. Greg has decided that instead of paying someone $10 to do it he'll just go buy some clippers and do it himself. Will thinks this is a cool idea. He isn't old enough to have the life experience he needs to know that this could be a disaster in the making. I am sure it will be fine and if it isn't, well, hair grows back. I'll report the results later this afternoon.

Have a great day!

Tricia
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Old 04-10-2005, 06:30 PM   #4
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Tricia, I love the gung ho attitude to diet and exercise and in my head I am right there with you. My body however could barely get off the couch. I did go and drag my garbage to the end of the driveway for tomorrow. I don't know why but I feel so much better if I do it the night before instead of waiting until the morning!

I don't know if it's the sore throat or the Nyquil but I feel just zapped today.

Send me "energy" thoughts. :

I will keep my for Will.
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Old 04-11-2005, 11:24 AM   #5
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I am getting old. One thing that makes Carl and i so special together is our ability to not take life so seriously and act like kids sometimes. On friday Carl and i were playing air plane. I stand in back of him facing his back and put my arms over his shoulders. He then pulls me up onto his back while bending forward at the wast. While i am balancing on his back, i pretend to be an air plane and he makes the buzzing noise of the plane. I know, we're strange but we have been married 32 years and i love doing silly and down right childish things with him. It keeps us thinking young. Well, this friday i was on his back when i got this sharp stabbing pain in my ribs. Carl quickly put me down and i was okay, then on saturday we had to pick up the love seat/sofa bed i bought at the garage sale that was extremely heavy. When sunday rolled around, i could barely move without some kind of pain in my right ribs. I hope i didn't do any permanent damage. Carl was so sweet yesterday. He did wash, folded and hung everything and made supper for me. I know it wasn't his fault that i got hurt, but he keeps apologizing. We have done silly stuff like this since day one when we got married and i have never gotten hurt so i don't know what happen this time. I took some pain pills and i think there starting to work. I see stars when i run my hand across my face. Hooo look, all the pretty little stars.
I think i need to go lay down now.
Peace.
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Old 04-11-2005, 01:46 PM   #6
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Gloria, I hope your ribs are feeling better soon. Nothing like a good pain pill, huh? You have a marriage made in heaven. Greg and I are much the same in that we enjoy being silly with one another. I hope we never lose that. Otherwise, it will be a loooong haul before we get to the "until death do we part" stage of life!
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Old 04-11-2005, 07:02 PM   #7
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Gloria your life is so entertaining!!!

I think you are right to follow in her footsteps, Tricia.

It has been raining for two days and is suppose to rain for two more. I keep thinking about all the work I have to do outside and get anxious!!! I know the rain is needed but couldn't it have waited until I was ready????

Food has been good (so far) today. I really need to get into exercise but I still feel so "crappy" in the head (NO comments) from this cold that I just don't want to move around. It may be just an excuse but I am going to wait one more day before I start back at exercise.

I forget, do any of you want Desperate Housewives?

Well, I really feel like a cup of coffee but no I can't have caffine this late in the day - hmmmmm, what to do????

What ever happened to Cheryll anyway?
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Old 04-11-2005, 10:39 PM   #8
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Just a note to let you know that I'm still around and still reading.

Barbg
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Old 04-12-2005, 09:18 AM   #9
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Peekaboo

Just checking in to let you guys know I'm still alive School's been getting more hectic as we get close to the end, with them cramming as much information as they can into our poor heads to get us ready for our next big test. 7 1/2 hours, 350 questions of exam goodness

Snuck in during class, so I haven't had a chance to catch up. I'm sorry I missed your birthday, Lucky; I did catch that. Happy belated birthday

I'll try to catch up as best I can (though, at this point, I'm not sure it's possible) *laugh*

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Old 04-12-2005, 01:29 PM   #10
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Did you ever have one of those boyfriends that you loved to be around right from the start? You got along with him so well and he treated you so nicely and everything he said seemed so important to you. But, then with no explanation he started paying less and less attention to you. You think you must have done something to deserve it so you'd go crawling back promising you'd be fix what ever it was you'd done wrong but then the same thing would happen again. For some reason you just keep going back until one day you wake up and smell the coffee and realized that you haven't done anything wrong - that cleary HE is the psycho and doesn't deserve YOUR attention.

That is me and my FREAKIN SCALE! I've haven't been weighing myself nearly as often - you know, if I give him his space everything will be fine. Well I stepped on this morning and that a**hole said I weighed 166.8! 2.8 lbs gained! I know, I know, I just got through with my whole, "not gonna worry abou the scale, gonna go by the size 10 jeans" speech. But, remember, I am in stupid girlfriend mode and I said all of that when I thought the scale was going to start being nice to me again!

Honestly, I'm really not that upset about it. I've been working much harder on the weights and I am sure I am finally starting to build more muscle. It was just such a SHOCK at first. I'm calm now - and back to sane, objective girlfriend mode - I've just got to find a way to break up with that ******* for good!

Hope you are all having a great day. Our weather is beautiful and when the kids finish their lunch we are going right back outside.

Oh, and Gloria, my tomato and pepper plants have their first blooms so we'll have nice fresh veggies in no time. I can't wait!

Talk to you all later!
Tricia
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Old 04-12-2005, 04:04 PM   #11
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Yes Tricia, i did have a boyfriend like that. Everyone including my parents just loved him. As it turned out, he was nothing but a blood sucking maggot that had everyone fooled. I put him out with the trash just like i did my scale. The funny thing though, my parents hated Carl but i just knew that this was the guy i could be truly happy with. To make a long story short, Carl and i went out on two dates in two weeks, moved in together for a couple of weeks and were married by the end of the month. Stupid old boyfriend sent me a letter wanting to get back together after Carl and i were married and still on our honeymoon. I sent him a letter back saying "You are a little to late. Boy that felt good signing my new name instead of my maiden name.

Could your extra pounds be from water weight instead of fat weight? You are still a young woman so i don't imagine you are going through menopause yet. I bet you will find that tomorrow your weight will be back down to normal.

After taking two days off to let my sore ribs heal, I'm having a hard time getting back on the "I hate my body and I'm not going to take it anymore) wagon. I'm wondering if its the heat. Even now as i sit here typing, all i want to do is go take a nape.

I am starting to worry about you Lucky and Chelsea. I hope you get to feeling better soon.

Hope to talk to you soon.
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Old 04-12-2005, 04:17 PM   #12
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Gloria, I don't know if it is water weight or muscle gain. I know for sure it isn't fat. I've been right on track with my diet and exercise. So, while it is possible to have not had a loss this week it is absolutely impossible that I've gained almost 3 pounds of fat. That is why I am not concerned. Just caught a little off guard is all. I look at it like this: I've got at least 30 lbs to lose before I hit my goal weight. I'm only 36 so I have many, many years to enjoy being at that weight. Three pounds up or down at this point isn't much a an issue in the big scheme of things. I am not going to stress about it unless I keep having unexplained gains. But, I'll cross that bridge if I ever come to it. No need to worry over something that hasn't even happened yet.

I was wondering where everyone else is too. Maybe everyone is feeling better and their weather is nice and they are just too busy enjoying being out and about. That is what I hope, anyway!

Oh, and Will passed his Karate test. We have the award ceremony tonight. He is sooo excited and I am soooo relieved!

Catch you all later.

Tricia
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Old 04-12-2005, 05:03 PM   #13
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Hey everyone

Guess what I've been doing today! Even though we had some snow (yes, snow!) last weekend, the weather seems to be headed straight to summer now. I decided it was finally safe to buy my tomato plants! We chose 4 varieties, but the new ones we bought a single, larger plant. I love Roma tomatoes, but they carry a newer hybrid at our local nursery, and it worked very well for me last year. They make terrific salsa, plus I chop them up for omelettes and all sorts of other dishes. The others are an early girl, a heatwave and a cherry type tomato called a SuperSweet 100. The name alone made me giggle. Just in case the weather turns on us again, I only have them transplanted into larger pots at this time so they can come in for the night. I normally buy the really small plants, so the larger ones feel a bit like I'm cheating. I'll find a way to get over it. Probably will have something to do with eating those first tomatoes that are already growing on them.

I'm almost over the nasty leftovers of this cold or whatever it was. I woke up this morning feeling ready to get back to everything, especially my workout, but my lungs still weren't quite up to the job. After hacking for a while, my back was all knotted up, and it felt like I was going to pull a muscle if I moved too quickly. Blah! Still, I checked with Tony, and we both think it is ok for me to be back on my food plan. I'm also going to go on a good walk this afternoon as long as the wind stays down.

I tried really hard to get my measurements taken this morning, but the lady I like to do mine at Curves was out right then. I do have a starting weight, and I'll get with her tomorrow. No point in stressing over it or using that as an excuse to wait another day to start back on my food plan. I doubt my inches would change that much after one day.

Tricia, I was so sad to read your frustrated post about that lousy picture. My first impulse was to tell you to get all dolled up, makeup, hair, your favorite outfit, etc., and to get out a digital camera. Step in front of the largest mirror you have in the house and take a picture of yourself! Take several, in fact. I bet the other picture just caught you wrong. You've seen pictures on tabloid covers that catch gorgeous stars and models in rotten lighting or some odd pose that makes them look 20 years older and too thin or too fat. A camera might not lie, but it isn't always telling the truth either. Anyway, that advice is probably far too late, because it sounds like you are rather on top of things again. Still, it might be fun to do, and you can look at the pics again when you are fitting those size 10 jeans comfortably. Right now I have a total love/hate relationship going on with older pictures of myself. I love to see how far I've come, but it makes me sad to know I was there in the first place. Oh, and the bad bf/bathroom scale analogy was so dead on! I still need to find a way to make a clean break with mine.

Gloria, ouch about the ribs! Are you sure you shouldn't be checked by a doctor? I hope it doesn't keep you off old blue, because I love those stories. The story about you and Carl meeting and marrying just made me smile. You two were really meant for each other.

BarbG, good to see you! How is every little thing?

Lucky, I think I pretty much know just how you feel. I feel like all my spring got put on hold because of this dumb chest cold. Still, glad to hear you are doing better. I'm really embarrassed I missed your birthday. Happy Belated! Oh! Almost forgot to ask. What do you think of cowboys? I mean the real thing. I have to find a way to get you in this part of the country to meet this great man who runs our equine therapy at the school. I swear, he can do everything. He even bakes his own bread! You planning a trip to Vegas soon?

Kat, sounds like you've hit the post vacation busies bad! Hope it all settles down soon, because I miss reading your posts (yeah, like I can say anything here).

Chelsea, you feeling any better yet? You were writing really regularly, so the silence has me a bit worried.

Thought I'd close this by sharing the piece I wrote for the paper this month. It isn't my best technical writing, but it does come from the heart. Just sharing some of who I am with you.


Time ticks away, as time will. It is already the middle of April, and the year is a third of the way over. The year past seems a distant memory. So much has occurred, so many things have changed, and yet, so many have stayed the same.

I was looking through some pictures of my girls, the pictures just a few years old, and I was amazed at how much my children have changed in such a relatively short time. Time appears to have stolen my babies away and left a teenager and a soon to be tween instead. In another five years, my eldest will probably be off to college, and another five from that, I could reasonably be a grandmother. It all seems so distant and yet imminent.

Time passes, and with each waking hour, precious moments are gone beyond a point where they can be reached again. Although the temptation is to dwell in the past, we are forced to live in the present and to face a potential future with an open heart and hopefully open mind. There is nothing less inevitable than a new day dawning. The choice is left to us as to how we will greet that day.

These thoughts surface as I recall a recent image of coming home from work early in the morning and finding my two girls lying asleep in my bed. Their precious faces appeared soft and angelic in the morning light, and they looked so peaceful beneath my blankets. Watching their quiet slumber, it was hard to remember the previous week of runny noses and hacking coughs as they fought their way through a nasty chest cold. Those thoughts slid away as I realized sadly that moments like these would become few and far between in the years to come.

I fought the impulse to slip into the room and wake them, just to hold their blanket warm bodies close. It was a selfish impulse, and they needed their rest. They would wake soon enough on their own. No need to rush things. Time cannot be forced, she moves as she will.

As much as the reality of this strikes me, it also settles in that there are no guarantees. My hopes and dreams might just be that, and everything can change in an instant. Somehow, this doesn’t stop me from wanting to look forward, into a future pregnant with possibility. My heart grows warm and my step feels lighter. I can face the new day without fear and embrace my future as being another day closer.


Take care all, and have a great day!

Andria
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Old 04-12-2005, 06:32 PM   #14
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I'm sorry that I haven't been here in a few days. My mom's computer seriously crashed, and my cousin Rob took a couple of days to get it back on it's feet running better than ever! He is an electronics genius!!

Gloria-So sorry to hear about your back! At least you and your hubby have fun, eh? I hope it gets better real soon!!

Tricia-I know how you feel about the scale. The son of a gun has done many of the same things to me in the past!

I know there are more posts to comment on, but I can't remember everything right now.

I am feeling much better. Still got the cough, but have been taking better meds for it. Thanks all for the concern!!

Talk to you all soon!
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Old 04-12-2005, 07:10 PM   #15
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Andria, I LOVE your article. It is all so true and written with such heart. Thanks so much for sharing it.

And thanks for your concern. I was very frustrated but everything seems to be falling back into place. I've been especially hungry the last two days which is somewhat alarming. But, I've been really on top of my exercise and I think I probably actually need the extra calories. That sounds like an excuse to gorge, I know. But, I'm keeping them in check - I'm not filling up on chips or anything. I'm confident that I'm not feeding my head and that this really is physical hunger. Still, it is such a foreign feeling anymore that I feel like I am treading dangerous waters. I think I have just reached a stage that is going to require more evaluation and I may have to play around a bit with my plan before I find exactly what it is I need. In the meantime, I am happy with any pounds lost but am focusing more on at least maintaining, clothing size, health, and exercise. I have at least 30 pounds to go so I am sure this won't be the last time I have to step back and assess my plan and progress. I am hoping that as long as I keep my eye on the ball it is all going to be fine - just not as fast as I would like. But isn't that always the case? LOL. SLow and steady wins the race as they say.

I am off to throw a pork tenderloin on the grill so I will catch you all tomorrow. Have a great night!

Tricia
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