[TallTracy88]

yow..i missed the discussion on glasses, anti-depressants and gastric by-pass..some of my fav ones..nuts..wahhhhhhhh can i weigh in now??

I am supposed to wear glasses but I hate them..i am like ok..i am fat, ugly and have a mini van though i do not drive it.. why glasses. This year omg.my eyes are like in need of b-focals...I am so ashamed of being so vain...I need to put them on..for honestly the world is a blur..so when you guys started talking about them..i started to laugh..me..walking around what does that sign say.

There was a lady at a place where i used to wrok where dhe brought her child..a little girl same age as my son.. She was divorced and her hubby had remarried..she had the surgery..she died three days later. That child's father didnt even want her..so her..she has lost both her mom..and dad..all becasue society says that if you are over weight..you are a big loser. You know what struck me the most..i wanted that surgery..i though if i was thin that the all my problems will go away..wrong..It is never about the weight...it is all about the mind.

Now as for anti-depressants...i have to vote yes for them. My family has a genetic chemical inbalance that affects every generation. To the point that my sister tried to kill herself about 5 times, Finally they got the combination right..and she has been stable for years. I should be on them but the side effects are too much for me. For some people they are the difference between life and death. But if anyone is using them just to feel a bit better than those are the people who are giving them a bad name.

These are subjects close to my heart...so if I have offended anyone I am sorry. I ahve to say this is my week for totally offending everyone so I just might be on a roll

This is Tracy, super offender signing off

[hippychic]

Good Morning!

Does anyone have an extra room? Raven, think your horse will let me bunk with him for a few days Things around here have been crazy, I feel like I can't keep my head on straight My brothers truck is broke down, the third time in a week, $700.00 to fix it, who has that kind of money going through a divorce? Anyway, we are all trying to share our truck and everyone has places to go and things to do, jobs to be at. Both of them have had little sleep this week trying to go and call and so on to find parts for his truck so they can fix it themselves. In the middle of all of this is me, trying to cook, do laundry, clean, took me 2 and a half hours to dust a vacuum the living room because they kept asking me to do stuff, trying to tend to Jordan's after school stuff. I feel a bit overwhelmed. I feel like I don't have time to wipe my own *** if you want to know the truth about it I have overslept twice this week, jump out of bed, drag Jordan out, rush to get ready to catch the bus..........OKAY, next week will be better.

I am happy to say, though I don't know how I did lose 2 pounds last week. I tried a new veggie this week, brussel sprouts, THEY STINK!!! so I have never tried them but to my surprise they aren't bad. I don't want a bunch of them but a few are okay.

I read through the posts quickly and remember Jolly has lost some weight, CONGRATS! Who else? I can't remember, I am sooooo sorry! Great Job to everyone here, I am sure everyone has made an accomplishment somewhere!!

Okay girls, right now I'm home alone so I have to run, get a few things done and get ready to go to the bank, grocery, Wal-Mart and prepare a funfilled for Jordan and my nephew for tomorrow! I feel overwhelmed already! Raven, tell your horse to move on over!!! Jolly, do you have horses? Maybe one of them will share!

Got to go, have a great Friday!!

[RavenToy]

Good morning - Happy Friday! Made it through another week.

Jolly - WTG on the working out!! Sounds to me like you're getting yourself back in gear very nicely. I hope everything is ok at work.

Happy - That kids meal sounds a lot like one I had a couple weeks ago, except I added some wonderful deli sliced ham into those grilled cheese sandwiches. And made the tomato soup with 1/2 milk, 1/2 water because... well, because that's the way I ate it growing up and it's sooooo good that way. It's a wonderful cold night-I'm too tired to cook-and the kids love it-besides I'm feeling sorry for myself meal. And boy oh boy I'm with you on the music and Leslie Sansone. I don't mind her stuff once in a while but if I'm in the wrong frame of mind, I really just want to throw a brick through the TV.

Tracy - Hi there!! LTNS! Aw heck, I think if there was any offending to be done, Happy and I took care of it. Like I said, someone taking anti-depressants is way better than someone taking their life. I'm right there with you on thinking that there are just so many people abusing the darn things then blaming all their problems on a pill, or the lack of a pill, or whatever. Eh. I think personal accountability is a scarce thing anymore. I'm a cynic, what can I say. Now wait .. you don't drive because you won't wear your glasses because you think they make you look bad??? Tell me I've got that wrong. Please. Because you know if that's true I will have no choice whatsoever but to giggle myself senseless. *poke*

Hippy!! - Welcome back from the land of 'ohmygodI'msobusyIdon'tevenhavetimetobreatheanymor e!' Or at least I'm glad you could spare a second to let us know you're ok. Sounds like your plate runneth over. I hope things calm down for you soon, that kind of stress makes it REAL hard to stay focused and on track, I know. OTOH, great news that you got a scale victory out of the deal!! Am I the only one who really likes the stinky little brussel sprouts? I don't know what it is about them, but I really like the little buggers. Little cabbages. Oh.. and my horse is a pasture boarder, soooooo unless you like sleeping under the moon and stars, I don't think that will work. Jolly, on the other hand - now HER horse has a STALL. Fancy. Just push the horse muffins out of the way and it might be pretty comfy.

Ok. I did two miles this morning, and I managed to run spurts of three tenths, one tenth, then two tenths. So making progress! Even if it's slow, that's ok. I am really jonesing to be able to run a full half mile without stopping, though. I know I was there, I can get there again. I want really badly to be able to run 5K. I'll get there, too.

Still up a pound from my goal. I have till 02/02/04 to drop it. I'm very OP with food, water, and exercise... so now I just have to be patient. *argh tears hair out* Not my strong point. I spent the entire time this morning on my treadmill daydreaming about riding. Obviously I need to get my rear out to the stables. My pony probably thinks I died. *sigh* Spring will come. It will. Some day. *whine mope* God I'm so spoiled. Tonight return that saddle and the rubber bits that didn't fit Emmy, tomorrow morning EARLY while it's still dark and cold and yuck go to WalMart and do the grocery shopping, come home and do treadmill, then off to the stables. Righto. For now, I suppose I'd better get some work done.

[jollygirl]

Hey all. what a week. I am glad it is over. I am way off with eating today. I will just admit I have been bad, and not even start to rationalize, Raven. I did not make it to the barn or gym, due to the weather and roads being crappy, but did get in a bit of a workout by shoveling, even though it wasn't my turn.

Hippee, you are welcome to share the stall, if you don't mind a horse nibbling on you all night. He likes company. It was real interesting the couple times I have had to borrow "his" bathroom. He wants to help.

Have a good night all. Talk to you later.

[happy2bme]

Originally Posted by TallTracy88

i though if i was thin that the all my problems will go away..wrong..It is never about the weight...it is all about the mind.

Ah Tracy, you must have known that place I've been in all week - you too Raven from the sounds of your posts and journals. In trying to hang on to the bits of motivation I have, I've also been doing some soul searching as to how to win the battle (I think I have a pretty good handle on how to lose it - the battle, obviously not the weight - from past experience). I've been reading and making mental notes at the things make people successful and the things that make them fail. Isn't it funny how there are a zillion books on eating - low carb, low fat, vegetarian, Mediteranean, diabetic - but how to overcome our own thoughts - the hardest part, we have to figure out on our own. Because the biggest battle in my opinion is fighting yourself. Resisting the temptation to eat the wrong stuff or too much of things or take the easy way out or use any number of excuses not to do what we already know we should be doing. I know some people have commented that they think they sabotage themselves because deep inside they are afraid to face the world as a fit and trim person without the cover of the fat to hide behind. I think for me, it comes down to not wanting to deny myself something I think I want - might be wanting to watch TV instead of exercise, might be wanting a Coke right here and now and not this bland tasteless water at the moment. So for me, I have had to admit that there are some things which I am apparently not mature enough to handle when it comes to self control. So I have to identify them and avoid them until I can try to tackle them again with self control. Chocolate chip cookies are one of my triggers. I love them and I can't imagine the rest of my life never having a few warm cookies and a glass of cool milk. I was so glad to see the slice and bakes in the dairy case. Since I can't trust myself to eat only one or two and leave the rest of the plate alone, now when I really want them, I pop 2 in the toaster oven and I sit very quietly when they are done, nibble at them and enjoy every bite. And when they are gone, they are gone. I promised myself that if I made 4 and ate all of them at once, I could never buy them again. I did the same with exercise. I'd love to work out for an hour and 1/2 each night - that's probably what I really need to burn the pounds off faster but it's not realistic. I can't devote that much time unless I abandoned 3FC altogether. But I CAN do at least 30 - 45 minutes. And while I'm sitting at my desk working, I do leg stretches and hold the tummy in for inside out sit ups and found all sorts of things I can do to get a little oomph into the day once I started thinking about it. So I'm making little changes, trying to form new habits and mostly trying to think before doing things unconsciously. So far it's working but we're only 3 weeks into the new year. I'm scared that something will come along and I'll be back in the ditch again instead of walking next to the wagon if not riding on it most every day. And I'm also trying very hard not to let the scale be my only means of measuring success because that nasty piece of metal really messes with my head.

So these are my deep thoughts for the night

Life sounds kind of hectic for all of you chicks right now - hope things smooth out a little over the weekend. Take some time to enjoy - even if it's snuggling under the afghan with a nice cup of tea and a good book or movie!

[hippychic]

Good Morning!

Jolly, you gave me a good laugh this morning! I'm still tickled, I can't imagine a big horse trying to help! That's just because I would not get that close to one! They are beautiful and if they are on the other side of the fence I love to pet them but that's it. I'm scared to death of them, I know that's crazy! I really don't know why....maybe because...well, I don't know! We had horses when I was a kid and I tried to ride once but always felt like I was going to fall. They would get all ancy so I just started staying on the other side of the fence. Who Knows!

Happy, you are so right. I think it's a constant battle when it comes to weightloss. In my mind I imagine what it will be like to be thin, healthy, to feel great and I thin I want it so bad I can't stand it but I'm not good at self control. I'm a big sweet eater and I ask myself what I want most, to look good or to eat that piece of cake and the sweets usually win. You know, alot of people say deprivation of your favorite foods isn't the way to go but to have them in moderation, I'm sure you know this but for me moderation doesn't seem to exist. I can't eat a bite or two of a candy bar, I want the whole thing so therefore I eat it. It's definately, for me, being a case of what I want when I want it. Just wanted to let you know you aren't the only one fighting that battle.

Okay, time to get my started, to everyone else have a great day and I'll check in later!

[jollygirl]

Wow. Happy, you are so right about how there are all these zillions of "diet" books out there, but nothing that gets to the heart of why we overeat in the first place. But why should there be? The diet/fitness/nutrition industries make millions, if not billions, of dollars off of people like us. Hey, we're gullible. We'll try anything.

From personal experience, and listening to everyone here, I think impulse control is something we all deal with. And, not to be contradictory Happy, I don't think that is the bottom line answer to why we are overweight. I think it is a symptom. Something happens in our life, good or bad, which threatens us - who we are, how we see ourselves, the way we do things - and we want ot get back to our comfort zone. So by doing something that has comforted us in the past (eating, shopping, drinking, whatever) we put ourselves back in the habits that we are comfortable with.

I am dealing with that right now on many levels. I am trying very hard to improve my spending habits and budget. So every once in awhile that inner three year old comes roaring out and I want to buy buy buy. I had the urge to drive to IKEA today and get that darned futon. I do not have the money right now. I have no business getting it right now. As soon as my taxes come in, and if I pick up a couple more extra shifts, I can get it and not feel guilty. But I really have to talk myself out of it. Eating healthy is adaily battle. And changing how I see myself as a woman, a person? Well, that road is even longer than my weight loss.

So I don't think it is just about lack of self control or impulse control for any of us. It is about how to change our comfort zones slowly and gently so we don't have to jump back into them.
OK. My deep thoughts for the day Have a good day everyone.

[RavenToy]

Hey you lovely wonderful inspirational women, you...

This is a quick one (I hope) because I'm still in the middle of a busy day, but just wanted to come in here for a quick read and post and boost to my motivation. Trying to use the time excuse to get out of working out. But it's not gonna fly. It's been SO long since I've been able to do any real grocery shopping that this paycheck with it's extra boost from the raise was the time to do it right, and WalMart was the place to go. I got HALF of the things I needed, but by that time my basket was overflowing, so I said fine, ok .. I'll get this and come back tomorrow morning again. Bah. I left here at 7:30, it's now 11:45. I've done the run, put away the stuff, gotten the meat repackaged and in the freezer, had my coffee and cereal (ahhhh Raisin Nut Bran, my weekend treat), fed the kids a donut or two (their weekend treat) and quickly checked my e-mail. Now it's time to suck down some water (oops) and hit the treadmill. Then a quick rinse in the shower, and off to the stables. Back here, a real shower with shaving and everything, and off to get the kids their fast food (a MAJOR treat since I'm eating out tonight) then off to dinner with the Boy. God help me, I'm so anxious about this. I would rather we weren't going out, but I promised him we would. I'm doing so well on food, and I still haven't lost that pound though I know I will any morning now... so we shall see how I handle this crisis.

Happy - I think you and I are really in the same place in a big way. Struggling to figure out what in our heads is causing us to gain weight, eat inappropriately. I too find that instant gratification is a big issue, because I can even hear that little kid throwing a tantrum in my head sometimes. "But I want it, and I want it NOW!! I deserve it! I've worked hard to earn it!" *sigh* But I know too that when I think of being in a situation where intimacy is involved, I get extremely anxious. Probably some of it has to do with what happened to me as a child. Maybe a lot of it. One side of me wants to be attractive and well .. you know. But part of me runs screaming from that in fear of my own behavior, fear of my partner's feelings for me (be they disrespect, disgust, etc.), and fear of my own emotions. Sex has been a weapon far too many times in my life. And if I'm fat, I don't have to worry about that, and can blame it on the men in my life that they don't want me, the jerks, they should love me and want me no matter what I look like. Bah, it's me who doesn't want me. ANYway.. my lord look at me ramble on.

Hippy - I have to confess to feeling bad for anyone afraid of horses. A healthy respect is a good thing, don't get me wrong, but fear... It's not that I don't respect that fear, I just feel bad. My horse has been one of the things that has truly helped me deal with a lot of emotions this year. He's a focus, a big, strong, warm rock of an animal that I can lean on and cry into his fur. There isn't any connection quite like it that I've ever felt before. I love my dogs, I love my snakes even, but... that click between my horse and I is something completely unique. Thank God for horses. I know my boyfriend doesn't understand at all, and I know, frankly, he's rather jealous.

Jolly - C'mon girl. I know things have been stressful and hectic lately. And yes, shoveling is really good exercise, it is, I know. You're doing really good on getting yourself back into a good routine on the eating and working out. Don't give up now, don't get discouraged or complacent, keep pushing it! I'm going to drag you along with me this year if it kills me!! (Road trip!!!) Lord I want that new truck. Argh.

Ok enough blathering on ... I must go do the treadmill thing. I must go ride, the weather is wonderful!!! And I must (groan, whine) go out to dinner. Who woulda ever thunk I'd be complaining about going to The Outback for dinner! Woe is me.

Happy weekend!!

[RavenToy]

HA! Jolly we cross posted. *hug* I agree with you on the symptom thing. For me the things causing those symptoms are big and dark and scary. I'll kill them eventually. I will indeed.

[luckycharm]

Happy Saturday Everyone.

Wow I have missed some deep discussion this week. Its been quite a week for everyone.

Jolly thank you so much for the chuckle of the horse helping you out.
That is way to funny.

Raven is this the weekend of your date night with Richard? Hope you are able to get out and see your pony this weekend. That is the problem with where we are boarding now is that unless it is extremely nice, Kristi can't ride Lucky, Good thing she still has lessons every week.

Hippy hope that you have fun with your nephew this weekend. Does your hubby and your brother get along well? Or are you having to listen to them also in your hectic week?

Tracy, I also am waiting to hear if you don't drive because of your glasses. I hate mine also, but I do wear them. How are you feeling? Did your kids manage to miss the bug that you had?

Happy, my downfall is also chocolate chip cookies. I have gone cold turkey with this. I have not bought or made any since November. Maybe one day I will try and have one.

Well my little nephews ended up in critical care intensive care up in the city on Monday this last week. They got that RSV virus that is so dangerous to babies. They were not expected to live. They have pulled through, but we spent alot of time up in the city with them. They should be home sometime next week.

Well I must run and get a few things done.

Have a great day everyone.
Kathy

[TallTracy88]

You know i just love you guys..i rant..and it is cool wiht you..thanks for being such amzing women..Truly you all got your heads on super straight..well from where i can see..but you know kinda fuzzy..lol

Oh lucky i am so sorry about your nephews..my prayers go out to them. My firl had it at 13 months..it was awful but the best news is that they are in the hospital..for the danger is the dehydration..so prayer and hug to all fo you..i will be waiting for some more news!!

Raven i feel in that boat too..i mean..hello..what is wrong wiht me..three pieces of bread for b'fast is way too much..why cannot i see that??I know emotions trigger me..i just do not get it..ok..my life is not perfect..and yes i would UPGRADE my hubby ..but not so bad when you hear other people lives..sigh..

Jolly iw ould kill for an ikea..i mena..hello people here do n ot even know what that is..sometimes..for me..i think spending just a wee bit more on one good piece would have been a whole heck of a lot better..than the couches I bought a few years ago that now are splitting...me..never going to buy a diet book again..i am fed up wiht them..if they worked so great..then why are so many of so fat?? Boy you hit the nail wiht the hammer today!!

Hippy is is a constant battle..i mean..just becasue you meet your gaol..well it still means we have to maintain...so any plan or prgram has to be doable in and out 356 a year..right..that is another great piece of advice..super great stuff today

Happy..i felt the light go on when i read your post too. Hello a million books,. a million pills a million shakes..new tapes you know..the industry does not want us to lose weight..they would all go out of business...think about it. If we figure what or why we eat..maybe at that time..we can say..ok..no..i will not do this right now..maybe saying no..just once..will break it.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh some great stuff today...thank you ladies!!

Ps got a slow cooker todya..anybody got any good recipies??

The supersta)(ie molly shannon in the catholic school girl skit!!)

[RavenToy]

G'morning ladies. Oof. I ate a lot at dinner last night. About 1/3 of a bloomin' onion, and I ordered the Queensland Chicken and Shrimp - I ate mostly just the chicken and shrimp with a little bit of the pasta. Of course I had to order dessert, so ate about half of one of the Cinnamon Apple Oblivion things. It was absolutely wonderful, and I woke up feeling completely hung over.

Outback doesn't provide nutrition data on it's food, so far as I can tell. I'm going to have to guesstimate, but I already know I went just a WEE bit over my ideal last night. It *looks* like I was at about 2000 calories total yesterday. This ONLY because (I'm a bad girl, but...) the only other thing I'd had to eat all day long was a serving of cereal in the morning. I'd been running around so much all day that I hadn't had a chance to eat. So, not that two wrongs make a right, but... well. pft. My tummy is still rumbly and trying to get back to normal, this morning I'm right back on plan and happy to be that way. I had my serving of cereal, three big glasses of water already, and my coffee. Lunch and dinner will be light and big on veggies.

I did three miles yesterday on the treadmill, and had a bit of an attitude shift. I rode my pony, too, so got almost everything done I was supposed to. Today I may give myself a break from working out. I'm doing laundry, got the dusting done, need to vacuum and clean the kitchen counters, but got part of the bathroom cleaned. The weather has gotten disgusting again, temperature is going down, it's been raining all day, and the wind is blowing. I guess I just need to be happy I had a good day yesterday for riding.

Lucky - How very scary about the little boys!! I'm so glad they're ok now, and I hope they continue to thrive. How is your new pony doing? How old is he now? What was the final name you settled on?

Tracy - You should know you can come here and vent.. that's one of the most amazing things about this place. We can come here and unload instead of eating it. I hope things are smoothing out for you.

Well, it's Sunday. As usual the weekend went far too quickly. I hope to have a relaxing day and get to be fairly early so I'm up tomorrow, ready to run, ready to tackle this week. Hope everyone's weekend was wonderful!

[happy2bme]

Ooooooowwwwwwww!!!! This rotten tooth of mine. Whatever the dentist did last week did NO good whatsoever. I am in MASSIVE pain. The kind of pain where if I was an animal I would be hunting down anything in sight and slaughtering it. The Davocette pain meds he gave me do nothing, and I have taken as many as 5 Motrin at once just to dull the pain enough that I don't want to put my head through a wall. I guess this tooth will be coming out tomorrow which presents a problem of it's own. I seem to have had this nerve problem with my teeth over the last 2 years. Bust the tooth, get a crown, the nerve gets inflamed and eventually the tooth has to come out. I am missing 2 teeth on the lower right side that he pulled 6 months ago. It takes time for the jaw to heel before they can replace those teeth. So I have nothing to chew on the right side. This current tooth is the bottom LEFT side. If he pulls it, how am I going to eat???? I have found that no matter how much soft food you eat, you really don't feel full until you've eaten some solid food. This is sooooooo frustrating. My tooth, face, jaw and ear hurt - cripes even my LIPS hurt! My husband said maybe it's time for a new dentist but I really think it's just my body. Maybe it's just a test to see if I can keep my resolve.

So I'm going to bear down, manage to get something done around here and now blow another day away. I'll be back later when I can think straight...

[RavenToy]

Oh Happy, I'm so sorry! I thought maybe it was under control now. I tend to agree with your husband, I think you need a second opinion. I'm big on getting as many options as possible out on the table before you make a decision.

Whatever you decide to do, I hope it resolves the pain issue quickly for you!!

[luckycharm]

Good morning all

Just popping in quick to wish everyone a happy monday. I am wishing I could hibernate today. Its cold. -34C and then add the wind chill -44.

Raven can you help us out? We got a baby cockatiel, and it is still being handfed. Question - how do you teach it to eat by itself? Kristi decided on Top Secret as her babies name.

Tracy, Jolly, Hippy, Happy have a great day. (Happy hope yours is pain free also.)

Kathy