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Dealing with haters / jealous females + dating

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Old 06-21-2012, 04:34 PM   #1
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Default Dealing with haters / jealous females + dating

How do you deal with

1. Women who are also overweight and constantly looking you up and down and asking you a billion questions when you have answered these questions before? It is definitely not coming from a kind heart, it is coming from jealousy. I had women switch to whatever diet I was on, even cancel their gym memberships and join my gym. The kicker, these women are often 15+ years older than me or want their daughters to comete with me. I try to avoid them if possible but I live in a small town. How should I handle their questions ?

2. (I anticipate this) But how do you deal with a guy who didn't really acknowledge you before but at a lower and lower weight is showing you more and more interest?
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Old 06-21-2012, 04:48 PM   #2
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Don't know about number 1 but for number 2, don't give these guys the time of day.Ignore them as they did you.
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Old 06-21-2012, 05:40 PM   #3
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Congratulations on your excellent weight loss. That is great!

I don't know how to deal with haters either, I run away lol.

Not sure exactly what you mean by the first group you describe. Those women don't sound like haters, just like ladies who are either jealous of seeing your success or who respect you and want to compliment you and be like you. Just my thought, I don't know.

Re guys, I don't understand them so can't say about #2.

You are doing so well. Maybe just don't worry about these kinds of things. There are always haters and irritating people to bug us. Lol, I don't waste time on them.
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Old 06-21-2012, 06:21 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bargoo View Post
Don't know about number 1 but for number 2, don't give these guys the time of day.Ignore them as they did you.
Yup, this.

Not sure about 1, but if they are worth your time, they will pay attention to you no matter what your weight!
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Old 06-21-2012, 06:28 PM   #5
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1) Are you sure they are haters they may genuinely look to your success as a model and want to emulate your success. Not in a hateful way but because they like you. If you really pick up on the "hate" vibe. All I can suggest is being civil but not too warm and open , answering questions without too much detail etc and finding reasons to leave the conversations. You can't be mean (small town girl myself I understand) but you can be less forthcoming on the deets.

2) I'm going against the grain on this. How do you feel about the guy, did you like him before? Were you friends. in a platonic way? Was he always kind at least? I don't know just things to consider if he was completely ambivalent to you before then I'm with everyone else but if there was a warmth and connection before but it just never went anywhere... there may be more to it than the weight loss?
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Old 06-21-2012, 06:29 PM   #6
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1) Smile, play the broken record. It's on you to be polite enough. If you are polite enough? The rest is their baggage -- their jealousy weird and whatnot. You mind you business and carry on. Don't assume, project, waste energy in that direction. It's not your baggage to hold.

2) Date them or not. People are attracted to whatever they are attracted to. You can accept that they were not attracted to larger people in general, and hold it against them and not bother to date them. Or you can not hold it against them and go on a date to get to know them a bit better first and give them the chop for meatier reasons (ex: treat mother, sister, all women badly) than just that. (ex: never noticed me when I was larger to ask me out before.)

That's about it.

The only person you can control or are in charge of is you.

So... stick to you and let the other people stand on their own merit.

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Old 06-22-2012, 09:08 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by astrophe View Post
1) Smile, play the broken record. It's on you to be polite enough. If you are polite enough? The rest is their baggage -- their jealousy weird and whatnot. You mind you business and carry on. Don't assume, project, waste energy in that direction. It's not your baggage to hold. ...
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