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Old 04-19-2009, 09:37 AM   #1  
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Hello 3Fcers-
My birthday came and went. I gave myself a few free days to enjoy the celebration and my days turned into a week and a half.
However, I did not enjoy a few treats, I went full on eat everything in site mode. While I walked the line close to binge eating- I can look back and say that I did not eat a obscene volume of food, just all the food I know to be bad.
And so that brings me to the know. I know all the methodology. I know the facts. I know the nutritional value. I even know what feels good and bad.
What the heck was I thinking?
This demon I have with food is bigger than my brain. It is bigger than my motivation, my want to be thin. What do I do? Do I go to therapy? Is there some underlying dark shadow I need to understand and solve?
Are we all resigned to be people who carefully monitor our intake our whole lives? I thought that at some point, I would stop wanting all this food. I thought at some point, I would think like a thin person.
I am still a fat person, thinking like a shrinking fat person- and giving the chance, the allowance I act on it and eat McDonalds.

Now, I feel like I have failed again. I am back on track- and I know that one step to success will be not letting a distraction keep me from long term weight loss, but boy, it sucks. I feel kind of doomed. Why didn't I just enjoy one treat and move on?

Just coming back to the forum felt like going to my own personal detention. (No offense because you are all fantastic and very un-matronly
So, how do you do it? Do you really lose your obsession with food? Do you eventually develop the attitude of "eat to live", not "live to eat"?
Thanks for listening to my very long post.
-Joanne 4lbs heavier
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Old 04-19-2009, 10:08 AM   #2  
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You have not failed. You had a bump in your path to a healthier life.

Forgive yourself, go to chicks in control and stay close to 3fc.
Hugs
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Old 04-19-2009, 10:28 AM   #3  
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You have not failed. Our bodies are wired and driven to seek both food and pleasure. The sad truth is that we DO have to be that vigilant. It's okay to have an experience like you just did because it's the reminder that what we want has to be worked for, daily. We can't overcome our addictions to food anymore than an alcoholic can stop his/her lifelong craving for alcohol. Unfortunately, we can't quit completely, we still have to eat.

It's normal to relapse. What is less normal is to catch yourself and change. Do you know how many times we've all let the type of event you just described completely derail our efforts? I've done it then quit trying to lose all together because 'what's the point now?' Instead of doing that you are getting right back on the healthy train.

You don't need counseling, in my opinion, they can't cure normal and it's normal to have that desire and drive to eat what you love rather than what you 'should'. However, just like and alcoholic, our cravings for bad stuff DO decrease over time. The problem is that once we have them again and 'remember' the flavor, it gets hard to stop the cravings again.
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Old 04-19-2009, 10:56 AM   #4  
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Hey Sweetie - I'm another one who says "you haven't failed". You haven't. All your questions are the same ones I have asked and I do believe that over time (YEARS though) we will think more like the thin person we are (becoming), rather than thinking about all the stuff we can't have, like a shrinking fat person (maybe not everyone does this, but I know *I* do).

So hang in there, move on, you are going to have those 4 lbs back off in no time. You only FAIL when you completely give up - and I am pretty sure that's not in your plan to do so
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Old 04-19-2009, 11:15 AM   #5  
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Come to chicks in control.Lots of talk about this promblem some of us have.Today is a new day.
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