Friday Snork

[beachgal]

HOME REMEDIES

1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost instantly removed.

2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink.

4. High blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a while, thus reducing the pressure in your veins..

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep when you hit the snooze button..

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.

7. Have a bad tooth ache? Hit your thumb with a hammer, then you will forget about the tooth ache.


Sometimes we Just Need to Remember What The Rules of Life Really Are...

You need only two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the duct tape.

Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

Never pass up an opportunity to pee.

If You Woke up Breathing, Congratulations! You have another chance!

[sweet tooth]

Please don't send the peeing in the sink rule to the 'men' in my house. I have finally got them trained to put the toilet seat down.

[Bunnababy]

Too funny!

Now I know how to keep my son from hitting the snooze button five hundred times.

[ellis]

Ah... a snork... just what I needed...

[Sunnybunny]

My husbands grandfather got up once in the middle of the night and peed in the sink while he was sleeping...lol

My grandfather got up one night when he and my grandmother were staying at her mom's house and peed in a chiffarobe drawer. They were very newly married and he was so embarrassed!!!!!!!!!! hahaha

Once when my husband and I were staying at my grandparents my dh had a little too much to drink and he peed all over me and the bed. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!! Nice. And then once he was sleep walking and he got up and peed right in our bedroom floor, standing there with his hand on the wall. I woke up when I heard water on the carpet and started screaming, "What are you doing?" and he just sounded so sad when he replied, "I don't know!"

Gotta love men!

[rightway]

Thanks for the laughs! It's Friday and I needed it. People around my desk are peeking in to see what's going on.

Have a good weekend everyone.

[AdiaFaith]

Once my brother woke up in the middle of the night and peed in his shoe! What a surprise the next morning!

[beachgal]

Oh man...men and their . They just never know the right way to use them, do they?

My boyfriend in high school said that one late night when he was very young he turned right instead of left and ended up in his parents room instead of the bathroom. Needless to say, he ended up peeing in their garbage can. Better than peeing on their bed, I guess.

Just goes to show...never pass up a chance to use the bathroom!