Hello, I sure hope this is not obnoxious but I just learned this "technique" about getting to the heart of self sabotage...
Sit quietly and think about the truth of these statements:
"There is a positive intention motivating every behavior; A person always chooses to go toward pleasure and away from pain."
If your actions are not in accordance with your "wishes", your "wishes" are not represented in your psyche as the more pleasrable choice at that moment.
Motivation to stay on a particular eating plan, occurs when the mind associates the current status quo (weight, size, etc.) as painful.
You may be able to find your motivation by concentrating on the following exercise:
Write the answers to these questions down:
1. What do you trully want? (Must be stated in the positive like: "I want to wear a size 10")
2. What makes this important to you and your life?
3. How will your life be different when you get your answer to question 1? See how your life will look and feel.
4. Are there any reasons at all that you would not want this outcome?
5. Is there anything that you think you might lose when you have this outcome?
6. If anything came up for 4 and 5,
analyze it in terms of rational vs irrational
likely vs unlikely
is 4 / 5 the reason for the actions not being in line with the wishes?
if so, find a compromise for a win win.
I hope I explained this well enough, it is amazingly helpful