I was perusing OLD threads, trying to keep from eating french fries, and I found this gem (slightly modified for my personal issues):
The Pasta Diet:
Try it, it really works!
Here's how, in 5 easy steps:
1) You walka pasta da bakery.
2) You walka pasta da fried potatoes.
3) You walka pasta da Ice Cream shop.
4) You walka pasta da pizzeria.
5) You justa walka and walka.
I am rolling. My kids think I am reading "damn you auto-correct".
Be well -