Does anybody here have any problems getting dates?
Just curious, as I have been chatting with people who claim they never get dates cause of weight.. so I was wondering what the rest of your experiances are??
I am overweight (240/size 20) but have never had this problem... and have dated some hotties.. BUT I am always wondering if they think I am overweight & just don't say anything or what...
Also, for you girls=)
Have you ever had a friend that was pretty skinny, & you get the feeling that they ask you to go too the bar etc. with them cause you are bigger & they are hoping that you are not any competition?
Well, just speaking on experience, I'm 22 years old, and I've never dated, never been kissed, never smoked, never done drugs, never drank, nothing, and I'm still a virgin. This girl I used to work with used to tell me, "You're like the cleanest person on the planet!" :lol
When I was in high school, I was so busy with band and Spanish club that I didn't have time to date. I usually try to just stay busy. If one day God wants me to date or get married or have kids (which I don't really plan on), it'll happen in His time
Originally posted by dallasgal Also, for you girls=)
Have you ever had a friend that was pretty skinny, & you get the feeling that they ask you to go too the bar etc. with them cause you are bigger & they are hoping that you are not any competition?
Yes, I feel like this all the time. My core group of friends that would all go clubbing are very pretty, I am right up there with them except for the weight. But that will come in time.
Can I say something else about this subject? On the part of 'clubbing', my ex-best friend and I used to go to this club in Arlington when we were seniors in high school. The very first time we were there, she told me to go and sign us up for the dance contest. When I was younger, I used to take dance classes, and I've ALWAYS loved to dance. Anyway, I signed us up, and guess who won the darn thing? ME! :lol It was so cool to go up there on the stage and get my $20 right there in front of all the skinny chicks, my ex-best friend being one of them.
I'm 22 as well and was a virgin up until this year (I could have had sex many times but chose to wait for the right one). I never dated in high school because no one seemed to be interested in me. Through college I concentrated on school up until the the past two years I met a lot of people online through craigslist.org and yahoo. I had lots of dates then at the beginning of the year I met my (now) boyfriend Dean on craigslist. We have been together for 4 months now.
You know its weird, but I used to tell myself that if I changed this about me or that about me then guys would like me. But in reality you shouldn't try to change anything for someone to like you. When I started meeting people online I always showed them pictures right off the bat and if they didn't like the way I looked then they could kiss my But you know what? A lot of people do like curvier girls. And its not just heavy set guys, but all types of guys from skinny, to muscular, from short, to tall, etc. I'm lucky that I found such a wonderful man who loves everything about me If you carry yourself with your head held high and exude self confidence then you shouldn't have trouble getting dates.
As far as clubbing goes I have never experienced that. I don't have friends that would do that to me. That's not really a true friend if that's how they think.
However, my bestfriend is very skinny and beautiful and I was always jealous of her because she got so much attention from guys. As I matured and got more self confidence I realized that I was beautiful too. I truly think the attitude you have about your self resonates to other people and that is what makes you attractive to others.
i've always been the "bigger" one in a group of my friends. but there have been times when i wasn't the biggest too. of course i get insecure when i go out with my size 3 or 6 girls, because they're going to get the attention first. but half of the time when we go on the dance floor all eyes are on me... not to toot my on horn, but i can dance i'm big into to showing off on the dance floor. i don't have to have a guy dance with me in order to be out. so with that confidence i usually find that i have tons of guys trying to dance with me anyway and trying to get my 7. so hey i say try to do something with confidence that you know they can't do. it'll make you feel a lot better.
Originally posted by SuchAPrettyFace Yes, I feel like this all the time. My core group of friends that would all go clubbing are very pretty, I am right up there with them except for the weight. But that will come in time.
I realized how this might've sounded. You guys need to know that most of my friends are married. So however I feel, it's usually all in my head.
I like to dance, and am not going to let my weight hold me back.
Oh, yes.. Absolutely! I'm 28 and have no experience with men. I say that it's all about my weight but it probably has more to do with lack of self esteem and worth (which all goes back to weight too). I've just never felt worthy of any attention. It's sad, I know... One of the "self improvement" projects that I'm working on is to make eye contact with every male I see. Just to practice.. It's hard to tell that heckler in my brain to be quiet when she says, "Oh, don't bother...he wouldn't like you---you are fat." **sigh**
Originally posted by MsVamp It's hard to tell that heckler in my brain to be quiet when she says, "Oh, don't bother...he wouldn't like you---you are fat."
I also feel that my weight is a major reason why I don't get dates anymore. Whether it is because I am heavy or just that my self esteem is lower I haven't figured out yet.
I know I have one girlfriend that I go out with a lot that usually gets ALL the attention from the guys. There has only been 2 times that I actually ended up with the guy and she was mad, even made the comment once "that has never happened to me before! I can't believe he just walked past me to dance with you!"
Yes that hurt me, but it also made me realize that maybe I'm not as repulsive as I often feel.
But, I do know that when I was smaller, I had no trouble finding a man, and I felt that I was fat even then!
My sister's fiancee is friends with a bunch of the guys I graduated with and I get very self conscious when I hang out with them, because I know they all have made fun of "fat" girls and only notice the very thin girls. (my sister included) My mom and dad have told my sister to "fix me up" with one of his friends, but I know that won't happen because I am not their "type" .
Ok, I've gotten a little off the subject in this, it seems to be a very touchy subject for me lately!
Anybody have problems getting dates?
But that will come in time.
But you know what? A lot of people do like curvier girls. And its not just heavy set guys, but all types of guys from skinny, to muscular, from short, to tall, etc. I'm lucky that I found such a wonderful man who loves everything about me 
not to toot my on horn, but i can dance 
i'm big into to showing off on the dance floor. i don't have to have a guy dance with me in order to be out. so with that confidence i usually find that i have tons of guys trying to dance with me anyway and trying to get my 7. so hey i say try to do something with confidence that you know they can't do. it'll make you feel a lot better. 
