Hi all...
Well.....I guess it's my turn to vent a little...I hope you all don't mind? The other night my husband and I went out with some friends. We went to this resort area and found a nice restaurant with an outdoor tiki bar,etc. Well...I was feeling pretty good about myself before we got there.....I was wearing the outfit below...(if the pictures work)...and thought I looked pretty good.
Well...we got out to the tiki bar...sat down for a few drinks and then the teeny-tiny's started rolling in and I instantly became the 255 pound person I once was. These girls were tiny with their little short shorts, cami's, tiny little legs, thongs hanging out,etc. I immediately got self conscious...started tugging at my shirt to hide my fat rolls....and sat there wondering if I'll ever be able to wear the things these girls wear or look the way they do...(not that I'd EVER want my thong hanging out..but you know what I mean).
I know I've come a long way and I'm proud of that......but somedays it just seems like I'll always be the fat one.....or I'll never be exactly where I want to be. Why can't I just be happy with who I am......and what I've done thus far?? I wish I could kick up my self esteem a notch or something.....take a self esteem class? Does anyone know what I'm talking about?
I'm sorry to vent...but sometimes you just gotta do it. I did make myself feel a little better by doing some comparison pics.....I do see a difference and it made me feel a little bit better.....but I still see that I have a ways to go.
I don't know..maybe I'm just in a bad mood tonight or something? A few days ago...I posted about being excited about goal and fitting into my high school prom dress,etc....now just a few days later....I'm feeling fat, ugly, and so far from being where I want to be....what's up with that?
Ok..I better run...thanks for listening everyone. I'll post my pic's below...I'm 255 in the first one and 166 in the others...
Hugs,
Liv