Not too bad of a day. Although I didn't get to dance I'm not going to beat myself up for it. See I'm trying to change my lifestyle also and I had a pretty good day doing so, so I'm not gonna beat myself up over the dancing. I ate so-so. Not really great but I did not eat after 7:00 and that is something I really want to stick to. I woke up and after getting my daughter off to school I took a shower AND blow dried my hair. Now I'm sure some of you are thinking what's the big deal...and your right, it's not...except for me. See there were some days, okay alot of days that my husband would come home and I'd be in the same thing he left me in. I know, GROSS! Don't get me wrong, I'm not opposed to showering, it's the makeup and doing my hair that I don't understand if I'm not going anywhere. I'd shower just before my DH came home and then put back on my sleeppants and a new t-shirt. So anyway 2 days in a row I've showered in the morning and done my hair. I still won't wear makeup around the house becuase I already have crappy skin but at least I'm blow drying my hair...oh AND I'm putting on jeans and a shirt. No more sleep pants or sweats. I figure this might help to make me feel better about myself during the day and that in turn might help with the weight loss. I watched the biggest loser tonight and really related to guy who said that when his son had a siezure he ate a burrito...turing to food again. GIRLS>>>THAT IS ME!!!!!!! Boy I love my food and my food loves me. Makes me feel so good sometimes I can't stand it. I specifially remember this one day that wasn't good and I was out and about, I COULD NOT WAIT to get home to stuff my face. It was like a drug I needed. Then when I got home and fullfilled that void/need. I was so happy and felt so much better. I don't want to give that feeling up...scares me. Also on the show there was a girl who was out to eat with her friends and couldn't really enjoy the good food becuase she needed to eat healthy. I said to my DH, I don't want to give up all that good stuff FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!!! Gosh ladies, am I one of those people that even when I do get thin I will still have to abstain, ALWAYS make the "right" choice. Like being an alcoholic...they can't even have ONE drink. Am I forever not going to be able to have one yummy treat????? These are some of the things that scare me. I know it is just the diet devil
trying to keep me fat but sometimes he really works. Well as I told my slef in my first post
I'm only going to worry about today. TODAY I will not get fatter, I can commit to today.
Well, I did commit to today and today I DID NOT get fatter. I'm happy with that for now.
Keep on keeping on~~~~~~~~~~~~
Em
