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Please look up Alanon - it's a support group for loved ones of alcoholics - I think going to meetings would help you a TON. And once you are able to deal with your feelings about your mother, it will help you SO MUCH in your own journey!!
I was just going to recommend this. This is great advice. Alanon is a wonderful support group! I grew up with 2 alcoholic fathers and I feel your pain honey.