Cruel Sister

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  • My sister has never been obese, but she is not stick thin either. She came home with fast food. I cannot control what she chooses to eat. However, she walked straight into my bedroom, put the food over my nose, and laughed that I couldn't eat it. No one else in my household thinks that this is cruel. I am really trying to change the way I eat and my behaviors. I am hurt that she finds that funny. I am also hurt by her husband who was rude to me about it as well.

    I have got to get this weight off and prove to everyone I am not some fat slob. No one thinks I can do it. I just want to be "normal" and healthy.

    I got upset and cried about it. I was hoping posting here would make me feel a little better.

    Any suggestions on how to deal with this if it arises again?
  • Wow, that is so rude! Do you live with them? I would say talk to her about it, but I don't know how receptive she'll be. If it were me, I'd just keep refusing it and make her eat her words when you are healthier and hotter than she is!
    *hugs*
  • Umm punch her in the face? :/

    No, I know that is not the answer and I don't have any suggestions but dang, that made me sad and mad and here's a for you. I am sure these lovely ladies (and men!) will have some real solutions for you.
  • My brothers used to do that to me all the time. My mother put me on diets since I was eight years old, and they would get junk food (cheeseburgers, pizza, chips) and get to eat it in front of me while I was forced to eat fish and vegetables. A good way to think of it is: she's eating that crap and getting fatter while you are abstaining and getting healthier.

    Karma's a *****! Keep it up for a while and see who ends up fatter, I bet you a hundred bucks it's not going to be you.

    Feel better, girl!
  • I live at home with my parents while attending college, and she lives here as well. She apologized after she realized I was upset, and claimed it was only a joke. But, still I don't see how a person could find humor in that knowing that I used to eat fast food all the time.

    It is really hard to change behaviors. I am trying. I do not need someone to laugh at me while I am trying to improve myself.
  • Wait, she's old enough to be married and does this sh!t?! Unacceptable.

    Maybe if she saw you in tears she would realize what a jerk she's been. A lot of people never realize how hurtful they are being until they see their victims at a weak point.

    What did her husband do?
  • I'd find a lock for my bedroom door - STAT!!!

    Sheesh - I'm sorry this happened to you - how completely rude and insensitive!!! Sorry that you were so upset by her cruel remarks. Hang in there - you're doing great!!
  • If it happens again, I'd suggest saying something along the lines of, "I'm going to assume you're being a ***** because you're threatened by the fact that I've lost 40 pounds. You're welcome to keep eating that garbage...and I'll look forward to the day that you're fatter than I am." You're obviously welcome to leave off the second part; it's not exactly filled with sisterly affection Honestly, she'd probably make some incredibly hurtful comment in reply, but she'd likely back off the food comments.

    The fact that she apologized when she saw how bad you felt is somewhat redeeming, but the fact that your family members seem to regard your efforts to lead a healthier life as a joke must be incredibly frustrating and hurtful...I wish there was a quick way to gain their support, but I'm afraid I don't have a real solution for you, other than point out when they're making you mad. I'm very sarcastic, and a bit passive-agressive, so I would tend to say something like "God, I just love how supportive my family is of my attempt to lead a long, healthy life...I'm just bathing in the glow of your love right now!"

    No matter how they treat you though, just know that you are actually bathing in the love of the people on this site...people who understand how hard it is to be successful at weight loss, even without family members that seem to want us to fail
  • The best revenge is your success. Keep right on eating healthy and losing the weight you want to lose.

    That'll show her!!!
  • If it were me, I'd probably have knocked the bag out of her hand and onto the floor, then stepped on it. Laughed and said "Now aren't you mad you can't eat it either??"

    <HUGS> I know how hurtful it must be for you to be in a household that doesn't support you. I give you the highest praise that you've lost 40 lbs in that environment! My hats off to you. Keep it up, and know you are in good SUPPORTIVE company here.
  • I'm glad she apologized, but hopefully this kind of behavior will end. Be proud of yourself, though. You resisted the temptation, and you've made yourself a better person by NOT smacking her.
  • I suggest feeding her while she sleeps and then giving her all your too-big clothes

    ok not really, but thoughts like that keep me smiling when my family are being lame. 40 pounds is a megahugeawesome achievement, and you should be seriously proud of yourself, even if your family don't seem to care
  • I would have grabbed the bag and dumped the food in the garbage. Like turn the bag upside down so it falls out the bag into the trash. She wouldn't do it again, that's for sure.
  • My brother would do things like that when he was five-ish. I got tired of it and licked whatever it was that he shoved under my nose. He never did it again. I'd say that coughing on her dinner would have a similar effect.
  • Quietly lose weight, pass her weight (since you said she's not "stick thin"), and rub your new size smaller-than-hers in her face.