How do I stop failing at this???

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  • I need to loose weight. Not only for my health- but to respect the temple of the Holy Ghost & to keep a good testimony- not only for those around me but for myself- to know that I in fact CAN do anything through His strength!

    I can fast- but I cant do this!
    Not that they're really comparable i guess.... but my goal is to loose about 70lbs & I "plan" on doing that by cutting my calories to around 1900 at first and adding exercise about 4x a week. I do really well throughout the beginning of the day but dinner just kills me every time! Or I'll see desert somewhere & I figure oh well I just ate a cookie, I might as well eat another, and 2 servings of ice cream, etc... I just need that self control- I feel ashamed that I DONT have that- Its a fruit of His spirit which I KNOW is in me- yet Im not experiencing it- I MUST get over this... I just feel defeated, I need help! I start every day great but by the afternoon its ruined... Help!
  • Recently my pastor has been talking about God's promises and all that is possible through faith. One of those things is healing, and I think that losing weight... being healthy... being whole is part of that. You have to have the faith that you will be whole. You have to KNOW it. I had been struggling like you until the last few weeks. I would do great during the day and at night I would undo all the good I did during the day. I tried counting calories and sticking to just 1800 calories a day, and I failed miserably. I wasn't really losing any weight, and I was hurting. When I realized what my pastor was saying about faith and trusting wholly in God, things became so much easier. I haven't been hungry all the time, I think most days I easily have less than 1,800 calories (I don't count calories now), and I have been losing more weight than I did before. I'm making good choices without feeling deprived because my focus is on my faith not on a diet. I'm still working on strengthening my faith, and I keep a lot of scriptures that help me. Maybe you could try reading the Bible or do praise and worship (sing!) when you're feeling weak. I hope this helps.

    Here are a few verses that help me:

    “For the Son of God, Jesus Christ . . . was not ‘Yes’ and ‘No,’ but in him it has always been ‘Yes.’ For no matter how many promises God has made, they are ‘Yes’ in Christ. And so through him the ‘Amen’ is spoken by us to the glory of God.” 2 Corinthians 1:19

    “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.” 1 Corinthians 10:13

    "But those who wait on the Lord gain new strength, they will mount up on wings like eagles..they will run and not be weary, they will walk and not get tired." Isaiah 40:31
  • I do really well throughout the beginning of the day but dinner just kills me every time!

    To me that would be a closer look at breakfast. Try flipping. Eat dinner at breakfast time and then breakfast at dinner time. It could be that you need something heartier in the morning to get you out of the fasting from the night and carry you through the day.

    The typical breakfast foods -- juice, toast, cereal -- are too light most of the time anyhow.

    Or I'll see desert somewhere & I figure oh well I just ate a cookie, I might as well eat another, and 2 servings of ice cream, etc...

    That's a trigger for me. Resist once at the store and don't buy is easier to me than resisting a hundred times once it is home.

    GL!
    A.
  • Astrophe has some interesting solutions there and they may just help -- by changing things up a bit for awhile. I switched to a protein heavy breakfast and found this to help: one or two eggs + one slice very lean ham + one wg toast + coffee; or a 2-egg omelette (with veggies and/or ham) + a toast + coffee. We have salad or soup with lunch and dinner and I try to eat that first and that helps me feel fuller.

    I have prayed that the LORD will make me WHOLE; as in healing that part of me that is out of control in my body (physical or emotions). I am focusing on eating HEALTHY; I'll do my best and let GOD do the rest! I agree about the dessert thing; have only serving sizes available until you learn control again. We buy only ice cream (low fat yogurt ice cream) that we won't binge on (ie vanilla or chocolate; less cals too).

    I try not to buy anything that I might binge on; this takes practice. You will make some mistakes, but just keep going and eventually, you will get better at it. I have a free day once a week where I can have my favorite meals and dessert; and this has helped a lot. I try not to be overly strict either, as then the weight-loss stalls; we have to make sure that our body gets the proper nutrients (a good vitamin) and enuff to eat so that we don't start having ravenous cravings. Also be sure to eat some good fats each day as in OMEGA-3 fats (1-2 tbl daily) as they satiate your hunger and prevents binges too.

    You can also switch your lunches with your dinners too; either way this may help you not to overdo it at dinnertime. Plan what you are going to have ahead and have the ingredients available too. I think many people have to re-learn what a real serving size is; we have not been taught this correctly.

    All of this takes time -- give yourself some time to get everything sorted out; one day at a time and one step at a time ...
  • thank you all for your help! I stayed within my calories today- I actually made it through one whole day! thats amazing for me... now just a lifetime to go...
  • If you use your God given signals of hunger and satisfaction you will be surprised what will happen. Don't worry about the foods you eat (take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat.....) just eat smaller amounts and be satisfied. When you deny yourself certain foods they become all you think about. Just eat small amounts and ask God for help. Though I am not as thin as I was as a teen, I have lost 40lbs doing this.
  • You said,
    Quote:
    thank you all for your help! I stayed within my calories today- I actually made it through one whole day! thats amazing for me... now just a lifetime to go...
    __________________
    I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
    You have that scripture in your signature but you don't believe it.

    READ: Galatians 5:22-23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.

    I used to read this passage and think, I have most of those fruits or attributes; I can’t wait until God gives me self-control. I would pray for self-control. Then one day it hit me, I realized that when I asked Jesus into my heart, I received the Holy Spirit, and these fruits are an attributes of my receiving Him. I already have self-control. Wow! Let me write that again I ALREADY HAVE THE CHARACTERISTIC OF SELF CONTROL!!! I have supernatural self control!

    Imagine if you inherited a million dollars and didn’t know it. You couldn’t spend it! Well now you know you have the gift of self control and now you know, go spend it!

    READ: John 8:44 You are of your father the devil, and the desires of your father you want to do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own resources, for he is a liar and the father of it.

    Satan is a liar and he desires that you think you have no self-control. He tells you all the time you don’t. Then you start repeating it. Don’t ever, ever let yourself do that again. When you say you don’t have self-control, what are you saying about your belief in the Word of God?

    Gary, (EZ Money) said something to me that changed my life, he said,
    Quote:
    "You can only have one thought at a time".
    Why would you waste it on negative thoughts. That is exactly what the Israelites did, when they were constantly murmuring! you are murmuring when you say things like,
    Quote:
    that's amazing for me... now just a lifetime to go...
    Of course God can get you through a lifetime, but you will limit His power if you keep thinking so negatively!

    Psalm 78:41, 42 Yes, again and again they tempted God, And limited the Holy One of Israel. 42 They did not remember His power: The day when He redeemed them from the enemy.

    Now buck up girl!!! You can do this, you are a Daughter of the KING! Remember that, and speak that. Don't ever let your mouth say anything negative. Satan can't read your thoughts so he can only act on what you say.

    Love Kelli
  • Hey there Kelli!
  • I was recently talking to a friend about something she is struggling with, and I said to her, "Self control only comes through wanting something better, and choosing that instead. If there is no 'better' to focus on, you won't have self-control."

    As soon as I spoke the words, I knew they applied to me and my journey to wellness as much as it did to her. If I continually keep the 'better' (health and wellness as God intended for me) in the front of my mind, it's easier to exercise the self-control to avoid the things that jeopardize my journey.
  • WELL HI BOOTSIE!!!! HOW ARE YOU??? I think about you and your funny animals all the time!
  • daughteroftheking, I can SO relate to what you say as I have felt and still do feel the same way...I want to glorify the Lord by using self-control in my eating as I know my gluttony is sin and I am not glorifying him in this area when I practice it. I know He forgives me...that is not the issue...I WANT to practice the life that He intended me to have. So I do understand.

    You have received some wonderful suggestions...it helped me to read them too. What for me has helped is to realize that how I live is a decision...everything we do involves a decision. God has given us the power to choose wisely but it is up to us. I have made the decision to choose wisely from now on. This decision is "backed up" by lots of prayer for God's help of course and I read Scriptures that pertain too to strengthen me.

    I still make mistakes and eat the wrong things or too much but this is happening less often. As a Christian, you ARE a daughter of the King and His power is in you. You are just confused about how to apply it esp when you tempted. There are so many food temptations and we eat for so many reasons, often not true hunger.

    Ask yourself whether you are really hungry for food...have you had enough calories, are you eating whole grains and fruits and veggies so you are getting good nutrition in your foods, are you drinking enough water before you eat. Plan your meals and snacks ahead of time and then eat your plan rather than just eating on impulse. Walk away, throw away..do whatever you have to do to get away from food you know you should not eat. I had to throw away almost a whole package of Oreos my son left here because even though they are not my favorite cookie, I still knew they would tempt me too much having them around. I figure I should not give place to the devil, you know?

    Eat intentionally...think before you eat...make your decision based on where you want to be. Will that food help you get there? These are things that are helping me get a handle on this area of my life.

    I have asked God to show me how to do this weightloss thing and I feel that He is. It might be a different approach for you but He will direct you. So stay close to Him and be sensitive to the Holy Spirit's leading as you make each decision. If you do blow it, just confess it and just pick up on your eating plan as if it hadn't happened. One decision builds on another so make the next decision a good one instead of continuing to go in the other direction. I say this because I used to think if I blew my diet that I might as well blow the whole day and start over tomorrow. I now know that is not the way to do it.

    Here at this forum we are all in this together... and together with God's help we can do it! And in the process we will also glorify our Father.
  • Wow that was awesome! Thank you so much! I will keep only positive things coming out of my mouth now! ... awesome!
    Quote: You said,

    You have that scripture in your signature but you don't believe it.

    READ: Galatians 5:22-23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.

    I used to read this passage and think, I have most of those fruits or attributes; I can’t wait until God gives me self-control. I would pray for self-control. Then one day it hit me, I realized that when I asked Jesus into my heart, I received the Holy Spirit, and these fruits are an attributes of my receiving Him. I already have self-control. Wow! Let me write that again I ALREADY HAVE THE CHARACTERISTIC OF SELF CONTROL!!! I have supernatural self control!

    Imagine if you inherited a million dollars and didn’t know it. You couldn’t spend it! Well now you know you have the gift of self control and now you know, go spend it!

    READ: John 8:44 You are of your father the devil, and the desires of your father you want to do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own resources, for he is a liar and the father of it.

    Satan is a liar and he desires that you think you have no self-control. He tells you all the time you don’t. Then you start repeating it. Don’t ever, ever let yourself do that again. When you say you don’t have self-control, what are you saying about your belief in the Word of God?

    Gary, (EZ Money) said something to me that changed my life, he said,

    Why would you waste it on negative thoughts. That is exactly what the Israelites did, when they were constantly murmuring! you are murmuring when you say things like,
    Of course God can get you through a lifetime, but you will limit His power if you keep thinking so negatively!

    Psalm 78:41, 42 Yes, again and again they tempted God, And limited the Holy One of Israel. 42 They did not remember His power: The day when He redeemed them from the enemy.

    Now buck up girl!!! You can do this, you are a Daughter of the KING! Remember that, and speak that. Don't ever let your mouth say anything negative. Satan can't read your thoughts so he can only act on what you say.

    Love Kelli
  • You go girl!!!
  • I'm going to ramble for a few minutes

    I have had a lifetime of food intake misadventures. I used to pray for the strength to go to bed hungry. I used to pray for low fat cheese to be on sale I prayed for strength to walk long distances even after I'd worked a hard shift.

    Slowly ... very slowly ... I came to understand that God made good food! Food as it grows in his domain is amazing! Nutritious, delicious, nourishing .... fuel for bodies made to function in his domain. Good fuel for all the things HE wants us to do each day.

    Now whole foods is not startling or new. Toting buckets of water in the garden instead of hefting a barbell is not new either. Neither is walking for the mail. But I, apparently, am a slow learner. It took the oddest turn/combo of events to put this all together for me.

    I'm sure you've all heard about caveman diets and can understand why I avoided books like Neanderthal or Paleo. One book is called Primal Blueprint by Mark Sisson. The star of this book is a caveman character called Grok ... caveman? pthft! I'm not reading that!

    However ... a very healthy, wise, active, level-headed friend recommended I do some reading. Chemical free? real meat? real vegetables? real fruit? nice walks? playing with kids? relaxing with friends?

    I did some Bible studying. I spoke with DH. Gotta love him! "Well prime just means first doesn't it?"
    When confronted by a church acquaintance (vegetarian) I did some more studying.
    I'm good now. My heart is content in the knowledge that I am using this body as God intended and feeding it with HIS goods. So what if I found this way of life through a crooked little path? If anything, it's improved my relationship with my Saviour. Everyday I am amazed at what tools my God will use to teach me.

    I'm not sure if I was trying to make a point or just tossing my thoughts out for consideration. Eh ... maybe there's something in there that might help.
  • KELLY ~ you already know I agree with what you said -- we must love ourselves the way GOD does. We do have self-control; one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit: it is ours already! A positive mind = a positive heart = a positive spirit = a healthy body ...


    SUSANB ~ I hear ya! I deliberately fill up my water jug and walk the entire length of my gardens watering my flowers and veggies; oh, I could use a sprinkler, but I won't get any exercise that way. I take my time, and love it! I also weed for about 15-30 minutes 2 x times a week for exercise too. I check out my garden every day and that gives me more exercise.

    I have also switched to whole, natural foods (ones I get in my grocery store), esp lots of veggies, salads, raw veggies, fruits, whole grains, and lean meats. I recently prayed about how I could improve my eating even more, and felt some hints come within my spirit to cut my meat servings in half (once again); and to increase my intake of fish each week (having salmon for dinner). I already eat a lot of chicken and turkey; and have now cut my red meats down to 1-2 times a week. Today, I had a vegetarian lunch; great for a hot summer day ...

    Sure, it has taken some time, but I'm getting better at this as time goes by; this is a new healthy, lifetime journey for me, so I want to enjoy it ...