I say hop on the scale and have a look. Just because you don't weigh doesn't mean it isn't true.

Then you have to get in the right frame of mind. Sit down and make a list of all the things you don't like about being overweight (tired, achy, clothes don't fit, uncomfortable, out of shape, etc). Then look at your list and turn them all into the positives you hope to achieve by losing weight (energy, feel great, fun to dress up, comfortable in my body, fit, etc.). Then I suggest just focusing on the positives list. That's what you are working toward. Stop wallowing in where you are and think about where you want to be. Then make a plan for how you are going to get there. Pick manageable goals that give you a sense of accomplishment along the way. 10 pounds, 5 -10% of your weight, etc. and just work on that.

Start right now by making your next food or exercise choice a good one. Go take a walk and give yourself a pep talk. And remember, negative thinking about your physical self isn't going to get you very far. Focus on being good to yourself and making good decisions for your health and the weight will come off.

Start now. Just turn away from the junk food at your next meal, give yourself a pat on the back and try and do it again the next time you eat.

I think we've all felt discouraged and frustrated and like we just don't know where to start. But I don't think there's any real easy answer. You just have to pick a time and start with that meal, that walk, that glass of water.

Don't feel overwhelmed. When you start making small changes, you'll start feeling better and that can be a great motivator. And don't beat yourself up over what's done. It's just that -- DONE. Time to start fresh.

Yup, seconding the weigh yourself. It helps to stare reality in the face, even if it's scary.

Then, make it easy. Set small goals eg. go for a walk. Buy healthy convenience foods to eat. Fruit. Pots of yoghurt. Premade soup and meals. Keep a food journal.

Success begets success, so do what you can, and then use this as motivation to try the harder stuff.

Thirding the weighing - I've found that although the numbers may be hideous, usually higher than I've even dreaded, just knowing the size of the problem, naming the beast helps.
Then yes, all you've got to do is make one healthy choice at your next meal, then at the next. Massive, complex diet plans don't work for me, just making small changes, and then gradually running the changes together.

Fourthing that weighing in!

I found it very easy to set small 'non weight-loss' goals first. I agree with CC about making the list of all the cons of being at your current weight and use these cons as goals to overcome!

I started with:
Drink at least 8 cups of water daily. (up to 12 now)
Exercise at least 30 mins a day - increasing weekly by 10 minutes (up to 60 minutes now)
Recording EVERYTHING you eat and make sure you count the carbs/calories dependant on your plan.
Remove trigger foods from home - replace with healthy alternatives. high sugar snacks are notorious binge triggers.
Plan your meals in advance - knowing what you need to eat to reach your carb/calorie limit daily is better than guessing all day long.

I have yet to set a "weight loss goal". I kind of know what I'd like to weigh (140's) but I'm taking my cool time getting there. For me right now, just doing those 4 things and not looking at how long I have to go.

Good luck!

yah I have to agree with the weighing thing, at least get a fixed number and make a promise to yourself that -- even if that number isn't going to go down for a while because you feel unmotivated - it won't go UP either!!! If you can't find it in you to make a real effort right now, I say make a pledge to stay the same for a while. That takes work too -- but not as much obviously, and it at least forces you to be aware of what you're eating. I say this because of how MANY times i half-hearted started a diet, shed 10 or 15 lbs., but gained back 20!!! if I'd vowed to maintain way back when, i'd be 100 lbs. lighter LOL. I know it kind of goes against our mission here to discourage you from losing weight, but hopefully you get what i mean???

In January, I could tell that I was very heavy and was in the same place that you are. Upset, frustrated, didn't know how/where to start, and didn't want to know how much I weighed. But I realized that facing the number on the scale was the first step--otherwise, how would I know whether or not I was losing?

So I spent a day or two mentally preparing myself and then stepped on the scale. It was hard and the number was about as bad as I thought it was going to be, but it also helped me to face reality and motivated me to get going.

My vote is to go ahead and weigh yourself. Whether or not you know the number, you weigh what you weigh so go ahead and arm yourself with the knowledge. Knowledge is power.

wow u all are so wonderful yes I need a few days to mentally prepare and map out my strategies but I knew turnin to you all would give me the kick I need...any other advice I greatly welcome as I venture this journey YET ONCE AGAIN ERRRRRGGGG

A couple of the moderators suggested a book, "The Fat Solution" by Tom Venuto -- I'm still working my way through it but the first third of the book is nothing but mental preparation for your program. (It looks like the nutrition part is less than 20-30 pages.) He lays out several ways to instill motivation and commitment, get started and reprogram yourself to stick with your program. So far, wayyyy cool.

Barb