OK. I've stayed away long enough. I haven't even visited the site until today. I kept trying to come back to get my life in order and to start losing weight again, but just wasn't committed to it. NOW I AM!!!!
I stepped on the scales for the first time in a long time friday and I'm back up to 273.5 (which means I've gained about 14 pounds over the last 3-4 months!)
Although I still don't have a plan to follow, what I am doing now is monitoring everything I eat using Fitday.com to keep track of all the food. I started it on Thursday and what I've found out is that my calories are under control, however my fat intake is way too high. I'm staying around 2000 calories but am having over 50 grams of fat a day!!!! No wonder I've been gaining weight. I also noticed that I'm having problems with night eating again. That's where all my fat and calories are coming from, but I've been starving when I get home.
On a positive note, I changed jobs a couple of weeks ago. I'm so less stressed out about work (I quit my job in September but told them I would stay until I found a new one) I'm with the same company but at a sister paper. I've moved back in with my parents (did that Oct. 1) and still live in Holdenville. I plan on moving to Eufaula either at the first of December or the first of January. It's an hour drive there and another hour drive back home and so far the drive has been doing me well. (I'm a thinker and analyzer and what better time than an hour alone in the car to resolve feelings). The down side to the drive is that I'm exhausted when I get home and I can't get up early enough to get in any exercise. So today (Sunday) I'm going to start exercising and I'm going to call one of my former co-workers here and see if she wants to walk with me in the evenings. I know I can get this weight under control and become the healthy woman inside I've always seen.
For the next couple of weeks I'm going to continue to just see what all I'm eating while making minor changes (adding more low-fat snack breaks in my work day) until I can get a plan that works for me.
It feels good already to be back among friends who are on the same road as me.
Good luck everyone.
Dawnyal