Let me preface this by saying I have always considered myself a pretty strong person with emotions that run on a pretty even keel. That said, I have always suppressed alot of my feelings with food. Now that I've really made a conscious choice not to do that, I feel like I'm a wreck. I came home last night from a long horrible day at work and I bawled like a baby! I wanted to eat so so bad, but I didn't. In some ways I feel like I'm just begining my education about myself, finding out who I am when I don't swallow my feelings constantly. I guess I just feel vulnerable, and I sound crazy!

Anyone else going through this?

Shannon

I completely know what you mean. I guess one of the biggest things for me was letting myself have the emotions - accepting them and not trying to suppress them. In the past I didn't feel like I should let myself be upset, angry, etc. and that I needed to dull the emotion to get over it, and food was my anesthetic of choice. I was so scared of letting myself get really angry or sad, or whatever that I had to dull it to deal. Now when I have those feelings I tell myself that it is ok for me to be feeling that way and then I try and use the feelings to try and delve into what is really wrong. It isn't easy, and sometimes I still revert, but it has gotten so much better.

A thousand times yes.. It's ok if you cry. Go ahead and cry all you want, allow yourself to feel whatever it is that's making you feel sad/overwhelmed/vunerable.

We can't be numb anymore. I know I don't want to be. I want to feel things and deal with my emotions by experiencing them and then dealing with the problems causing them.

You're not crazy. You just have to have some release!

We all have those kind of days. Crying is a form of release and it helps sometimes to release those emotions that way. Don't feel bad and it does not make you weak just because you have emotions. Let it out, you'll feel much better.

Wishing You All The Best
Denise

Hi Shannon!

YES! I know EXACTLY what you mean! For YEARS I ate emotionally without realizing that I was doing it! I packed on a HUNDRED emotional pounds for all kinds of reasons!

You are really ahead of MY game in already KNOWING and making a conscious choice to NOT eat out of emotion. Good for you!

I also want to congratulate you for realizing that stuffing food in your mouth is not the answer when you are feeling down and sad. It took me a lot longer to figure this out!

Have you been exercising less lately? I find that when I stop exercising for a few days due to being busy or sick or just plain L-A-Z-Y, I DO begin to get depressed easier. Exercise really DOES produce endorphins which give life a positive spin.

Hope that you will be feeling better very soon!

Cheryl

Hi Shannon, I'm just now figuring all this out myself. I've never allowed myself to confront family members directly about things. Always talking in circles or avoiding unpleasant topics. Now I see why I've struggled with my weight. I go to food to help subdue that anger. So now, in addition to loosing weight (obviously), my goal is to address the feelings instead of eating tortilla chips. Little things stress me out, and I realized it is totally an automatic response for me to start rumaging for food in the kitchen. I was stunned when I made the connection. Big lightbulb moment. Go ahead and have a good cry. You probably haven't released these emotions in a long time. My thinking is that I'll be really mad and cranky for a while until I learn to just have my emotions and address them. You may need to just be emotional for a while until you understand your feelings better.
Then again, this is all just my version of arm chair physchology. But it sounds good right? You are definitely not alone.