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A thin persons opinion of pregnancy weight gain

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Old 10-02-2014, 05:42 AM   #1
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Default A thin persons opinion of pregnancy weight gain

Okay so I am there trying to wake up this morning and the first thing that jumps back at me is the national paper and this article on pregnancy weight gain:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/ar...xcuse-fat.html

I know we should all be watching what we eat so we don't gain 4 stone in one pregnancy, but I think she has gone a bit too far on this.

Either way I feel its hard for you to enjoy a pregnancy when there is this obsession with how much weight you have gained, whether you have gained too much, not enough etc.

I remember when I was expecting my first post pregnancy I weighed 12 stone and had a good 2.5 stone to lose and there were lots of women bigger than me congratulating me on my figure. And it made me wonder what they would say if I was slim?
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Old 10-02-2014, 09:38 AM   #2
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Wow. So, while I don't have a problem with her approach to her pregnancy, I actually applaud her ability to have been so healthy exercising and weight gain wise, I have a BIG problem with the way she is talking about other women.

"not every mother-to-be has to turn into an overweight, out-of-shape slob"
How RUDE can you get!? She spends half the article complaining about people judging her for her approach/experience with pregnancy, while she at the same time is saying horrible things about other women's experiences during pregnancy. I plan on doing my best to exercise and eat a healthy lifestyle when I"m pregnant, but I know a lot of women who have eaten not great things in the 1st trimester because it's all they can keep down, and then they keep eating those foods and gain more weight. My main problem is, if you don't want to be judged for your choices, don't turn around and judge others equally harshly. You reap what you sow.

"Yet when did you ever hear anyone berate a pregnant woman for putting her feet up, gorging herself on cream cakes and chips and whacking on a pile of unnecessary weight?"
Umm. A LOT actually. Every time you go into the doctor they get on you if you've gained a lot. It is completely normal for doctor's to be incredibly picky about every woman's weight gain or lack of gain in pregnancy. It's complicated thing! you're creating a little human!

"In fact, no extra calories are needed until the final three months of a pregnancy, and even then only a further 200 a day are recommended, the equivalent of one extra slice of toast or a small bowl of cereal."
Yes, this is true, and I agree that this is a good plan for pregnancy, not "eating for two" which you hear a lot. However, it is very hard to stick to this for a lot of women with all the hormonal changes going on. I think we should all do our best to take care of ourselves and babies during pregnancy, but respect each others journeys, and not be hateful or jealous either way, but again (maybe it's the little bit of evil in me) if you open up the door and judge and criticize others, expect to get it back in your face. Rudeness and ignorance to others is a big pet peeve of mine. clearly!
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Old 10-03-2014, 08:40 PM   #3
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I had no problem with the article. She was a bit rude, but I think that culturally we need a wakeup call.

And she gained 20lbs. That is perfectly acceptable, and produced a healthy baby.
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Old 10-09-2014, 06:30 AM   #4
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Originally Posted by Claygirl1518 View Post
Wow. So, while I don't have a problem with her approach to her pregnancy, I actually applaud her ability to have been so healthy exercising and weight gain wise, I have a BIG problem with the way she is talking about other women.

"not every mother-to-be has to turn into an overweight, out-of-shape slob"
How RUDE can you get!? She spends half the article complaining about people judging her for her approach/experience with pregnancy, while she at the same time is saying horrible things about other women's experiences during pregnancy. I plan on doing my best to exercise and eat a healthy lifestyle when I"m pregnant, but I know a lot of women who have eaten not great things in the 1st trimester because it's all they can keep down, and then they keep eating those foods and gain more weight. My main problem is, if you don't want to be judged for your choices, don't turn around and judge others equally harshly. You reap what you sow.

"Yet when did you ever hear anyone berate a pregnant woman for putting her feet up, gorging herself on cream cakes and chips and whacking on a pile of unnecessary weight?"
Umm. A LOT actually. Every time you go into the doctor they get on you if you've gained a lot. It is completely normal for doctor's to be incredibly picky about every woman's weight gain or lack of gain in pregnancy. It's complicated thing! you're creating a little human!

"In fact, no extra calories are needed until the final three months of a pregnancy, and even then only a further 200 a day are recommended, the equivalent of one extra slice of toast or a small bowl of cereal."
Yes, this is true, and I agree that this is a good plan for pregnancy, not "eating for two" which you hear a lot. However, it is very hard to stick to this for a lot of women with all the hormonal changes going on. I think we should all do our best to take care of ourselves and babies during pregnancy, but respect each others journeys, and not be hateful or jealous either way, but again (maybe it's the little bit of evil in me) if you open up the door and judge and criticize others, expect to get it back in your face. Rudeness and ignorance to others is a big pet peeve of mine. clearly!
I am very much with you about her opinion to other women. When I was 19 I didn't really care that much about my weight when I was having my first child. Now because I am losing weight before pregnancy and with people constantly commenting on bump sizes it makes me a lot more sensitive of my size.

I just think she could have put it better.
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Old 10-11-2014, 08:58 AM   #5
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I didn't read the article, because frankly when I'm pregnant, I can be a bit hot headed. If she says something that annoys me enough, I simply don't have the time to hunt her down to rip her a new one.

Do women need to gain more than 20-30 lbs while pregnant? No.

But there plenty of things women do (and don't do) that *I* find shameful. My first thought on this woman is, does she have a college education and a "real" job, aside from blogging online? As much as she can put women down for gaining weight while pregnant, I can say the same about her having excuses for staying uneducated and being to lazy to do something with her life. (PLEASE, I'm making a point here, not trying to actually insult people that haven't pursued an education). I can name a few others life choices that I can easily put down. And since we can all find areas of our life that we could have tried harder and done a better job, it is typically a good idea not to point fingers at others unless you have first looked at your own life.

(at this point I re-clicked the link and read only the opening, and skimmed the rest)

Ok, it is so sad that her life is so empty that she has time in her own thoughts to insult people. If she was really concerned she would have had much different thoughts. Not so condemning. We can easily have these thoughts about so many people, for so many reasons. Privately insulting them in our minds, for being fat, ugly, old, dressed in a way we don't approve, being a race or religion we judge, doing a job we look down on etc. But having so much free space in our heads to think such awful thoughts only tells us what lonely, and angry people we are. The message of staying healthy while pregnant is an important one. I support it 100%. I support getting the message about there that women can stay healthy throughout their pregnancy and will be happier for it. But her approach (from what little I skimmed) wasn't about helping others, it was about herself, and her own short comings and need to feel better than others. No messenger reaches their audience or makes change when their real goal is to say "look at me, I'm how you should be or else you are bad". I would expect with this attitude that this woman is not a very happy person inside. Happy people want to lift others up, not put them down (under the cover of "helping" them.)

There are plenty of resources out there on how to take care of your self with pregnant. Anything like this should not be ignored as its true purpose was never to educate or inspire.

***

On a personal note, I am a firm believer in set points. I have watched it with my own body over many years. I think all my stats are in my siggy below. My first pregnancy I gained totally on track until the third trimester. I had a very active job and I was on my feet for 12+ hours a day. I was pulled out of work early because my cervix was shortening and I was at high risk for preterm labor. And I sat the last trimester, a lot. I was not put on bed rest but was told to restrict my activity, and I did. But I also ate with no concern for what I was eating. I gained way to much weight the last trimester. But it all came off within the year following.

My second baby, I didn't experience weight gain issues until my third trimester again. I worked up until delivery this time and was careful about what I ate. My weight was lower than with Bb#1 but still I gained so much. It came off right after.

I got into running after Bb#2, and when I became pregnant with Bb#3 I stayed active until I ended up with hyperemesis. I actually lost 15 pounds by 15 weeks, and wasn't keeping anything down. As that subsided, I started walking (not running) simple because I felt so draining. Losing 15lbs from healthy diet & exercise does NOT feel the same as losing it while laying on a couch and not eating for weeks. That leave you week and tired. Again, my weight increased steadily, and then packed on the last trimester. I made a point to eat whole foods and nutritious foods, and continued walking. It was obvious to me the difference in my eating pattern. It wasn't what I was eating, or how much, but the frequency. I see this now with the current pregnancy. I eat more often. When I'm not pregnant I'll eat about every 4-5 hours. But when pregnant I eat about evey1-2 hours. Even eating small healthier meals, still adds up. I lost the weight after Bb#3 again, and was at starting weight before Bb#4.

Currently I've counted some days and really watched, but around that 2 hour mark if I don't eat I start to feel nauseous and shaky. I have been following a fairly strict diet because of my gallbladder. So I have to watch what I eat. Do I still splurge? Yes, but I did so when I wasn't pregnant and thinner too. To imagine that pregnant women are eating these huge amounts of garbage is ignorant. And it shows her ignorance in health and nutrition. But I wouldn't expect a lay person that writes crappy blogs for a living to know that. Perhaps if she really cared, she would educated herself on what is really the issue. Actually, truth be told most women and I know myself the same CAN'T each huge amounts! The expanding uterus makes larger meals uncomfortable and heartburn ramped. Personally I'd say my portion sized are actually smaller when pregnant, especially towards the end, but far more frequent. Anyone that knows anything about pregnancy health would know that.

I also think a big issue is I am not nearly as active during pregnancy mainly because I now opt to sleep until 6am rather than get up a 4am to exercise. I still go out for walks with the kids, but that morning time is my time to really workout and log my miles running. When I'm pregnant, I'd rather sleep. Period! So work in my activity during the day, which is not as intense. Walking, workout video, but mostly taking the kids for a walk. I'm just not burning the kind of calories I do when running.

At this point I am 177lbs. Which I'm nervous about because I've been this weight before at this point. It really seems to pile on in that last trimester. At the same time, it melts off after baby. I have lost all my pregnancy weight within a year or less after each baby, and typically its "easy" until I hit about 165, which I believe is my other set point, but that's a whole other post!

I believe that being healthy is very important. And that included weight management along with many other important choices. But I also think it is equally important to be a good person too. I don't think being thin cancels out being a judgmental dbag to be honest. I think women that take the time and energy to take care of their bodies should be proud, yes, and should not be ashamed of looking good as they worked for it. But I think if this wrtier spent half the time she does on patting herself on the back for looking good and used that to try to clean the negative out of her inner thoughts, she might find that would actually make her a better person. Just my 2 cents.
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Pregnancy Goal: Maintain current weight between 175-180lbs

Last edited by GlamourGirl827 : 10-11-2014 at 08:59 AM.
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Old 10-11-2014, 07:55 PM   #6
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We have a culture of women gaining 50+ lbs during pregnancy, and it is considered by some experts to be a significant contributor to obesity. She worked hard and avoided that. Maybe sometimes we need to hear someone who doesn't beat around the bush.
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Old 10-11-2014, 09:47 PM   #7
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We have a culture of women gaining 50+ lbs during pregnancy, and it is considered by some experts to be a significant contributor to obesity. She worked hard and avoided that. Maybe sometimes we need to hear someone who doesn't beat around the bush.
I can assure you this approach doesn't work. I can promise you. As a nurse for a a decade I have educated people on many dangerous health habits from weight gain, to smoking, to drug use to tanning....and so on.

I can tell you, I have yet to meet a patient that doesn't already know what they are doing wrong. Not beating around the bush the way you are describing it, implies your audience thinks what they are doing is ok, and that "gentler" education is not getting through and the only way they will get it, it to be a douche about it.

If you think this is the case you need to actually get out there and interact with people that need health education and stop reading blogs written by self righteous women that have nothing to actually offer in the way of weight management education. Problem is, so many people want to tell people how to be healthy, but so few want to put in the time and work to go to school and actually get a job in a field where they can reach people. So they never learn how to properly connect and communicate with their patients, and end up like this blogger (and you?) thinking that an insulting approach will reach women. It won't. I could write the same piece, with an entirely different attitude and actually have a chance of getting pregnant women to be more mindful of their weight. Because I have the experience and education, and not a need to make myself feel good by insulting others under the guise of "educating" them on weight management.

For what's its worth, I don't know if you know who Maria Kang is, but I follow her page and enjoy her messages. I think she is coming from a place of wanting to help people although I realize that many people find her message insulting. I think she does not beat around the bush. There is a difference between delivering a clear message and a judgmental one. I think you are confusing the two.
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Pregnancy Goal: Maintain current weight between 175-180lbs

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Old 10-11-2014, 10:19 PM   #8
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What about women with high-risk pregnancies and/or who are on bed rest? Pretty cruel article from that point of view, which I'm sure the author never thought about, being too busy comparing her figure selfies to Kate Middleton.

I rolled my eyes so much at the KM references it will take awhile to get them unstuck.
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Old 10-12-2014, 10:28 AM   #9
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What about women with high-risk pregnancies and/or who are on bed rest? Pretty cruel article from that point of view, which I'm sure the author never thought about, being too busy comparing her figure selfies to Kate Middleton.

I rolled my eyes so much at the KM references it will take awhile to get them unstuck.
I think this supports the point that the "author" (some uneducated lady at her computer is not worthy of title author ) is not trying to inform people but find a platform for her self absorbed bubble headed thoughts and spew negativity towards those that she puts down to make herself feel superior. This woman should not be used as any place for reference for anything, other than how to be a vain as$hat. An article about how important it is to maintain a healthy weight while pregnant and stay active should not be centrally focused around the writers self absorbed attitude and judgments.

I think this lady is lazy because she cant get her loser butt to school to actually learn about the topic she is preaching about. We live in a culture of people now more than ever thanks to online that read a few blogs and google some quick info on their smart phones and now think they are health experts. In this new culture, people think their opinion is important and worthy of being heard, and we have this asinine saying that everyone is entitled to their opinion, but the truth is not all opinions are equal or even valid. Our new self important culture lets people like this women think that her inner thoughts of vanity and judgments towards other women deserve to be written down and read by the general public. And thanks to the internet, bozos like this lady now have a way to put their uneducated thoughts out there, further validating their own sense of self importance.

This culture of "what I have to say is important because I think it" needs to stop. But it won't unfortunately. Every moron out there can now start a webpage, blog or post unfounded stuff on the facebook page. Gone are the days when people learned that some things are better left unsaid. The internet, IMO, shows at times the darkness of humanity. So full of all those toxic thoughts that no one will say to someone's face.

The internet has skewed the minds of people into thinking that being open, honest and forthcoming must be done with harshness and judgment. Also the internet has glorified this narcissistic attitude through things like selfies. We have over shot feeling good about one's self and landed into a generation of young people that think that every thing they eat, do, say, feel, and think is worth of public display.

I am almost 34. I did not have the internet growing up. And while I heard of it through late high school. it wasn't something people did. In my early 20s AOL instant messenger existed (AIM) but again, not everyone had access to a computer (I didn't) and the internet wasn't a place to promote yourself. It was mainly where people downloaded free music (because you could do that then). Cell phones started becoming pretty popular in my mid 20s but the idea of iPhones and selfies and facebooking everything didn't really take off until around after I had my first baby. Well, facebook came first, then the popular iPhone, now making it possible to share EVEYTHING you do at EVERY moment since you no longer had to wait to get back home to your computer. I am the last generation to grow up not thinking that every time I eat a sandwich I thought was good, or think the person in front of me in line isn't dress the way I approve, that I should take a picture and share it with the world, or write a blog about it.

My point it, this blog post is no more than someone that knows nothing about a subject insulting others and venting about her thoughts on the topic along with how much she loves herself. This is not education. This is not inspiration. This is not a straight forward message. This is a troll that took the time to put her thoughts into writing because she thinks her thoughts are worthy of that.

I do not disagree by any means that excessive weight gain during pregnancy is a problem. I have been fortunate that my weight gain has never been a problem for me (GD or high BP). But it can definitely cause many health issues for mom and baby. I think health care providers need to continue to reach out to expecting women and educated them, and doctor need to work with their patients to council them on weighty management throughout pregnancy.

Unless this lady is out there doing the work to reach people, and that means closing the laptop and getting off her arse to actually do some work to help someone, then I don't think she's really passionate about anything other than herself.
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2007- 230 lbs to 160 lbs after baby #1 Boy
2010- 220 lbs to 145 lbs after baby #2 Boy
2013 - 215 lbs to 157 lbs after baby #3 Boy
Baby #4 - It's a Girl!


Pregnancy Goal: Maintain current weight between 175-180lbs

Last edited by GlamourGirl827 : 10-12-2014 at 10:34 AM.
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Old 10-12-2014, 04:36 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by Claygirl1518 View Post
She spends half the article complaining about people judging her for her approach/experience with pregnancy, while she at the same time is saying horrible things about other women's experiences during pregnancy.
Wanted to tell her to toughen up and grow a pair. Because everyone gets unsolicited comments about her pregnancy. And that continues with child rearing, schooling, driving, you name it, until we draw our last breath.

I think this was really just an excuse to smugly post her own selfies & lambaste other pregnant women.
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