I was wondering if you all could give me some advice. Could OA help me?
I'm not really an "overeater" right now. I used to be a binge eater, but I stopped, lost 25 pounds through Weight Watchers, and have kept it off and been a lifetime member for 1.5 years. So I have my eating under control. But that's exactly what it is - under tight control. I feel like if I let up for one second, I'll start overeating again.
I always thought that being thin would make me happy. But I'm not happy! I'm still obsessed with food, weight, and exercise. I think about eating, and what I can't eat, and what I shouldn't eat, and what I want to eat, almost every moment. I exercise every day, if I don't I feel guilty - in fact, about 2 months ago they kicked me out of the gym for over-exercising. (Was doing over 2 hours every day - they said I would hurt myself, and made me go home.) I still hate my body and think I look fat.
I'm a sober alcholic, in AA for 6 years, and this feels exactly like when I used to control my drinking. I'd love to be able to just relax, eat when I'm hungry, and not be a slave to all the food and body image talk in my head. But I've tried to use the same coping skills from AA, and this is different. I have to eat, so I have to put some thought into it.
Anyway, do you think I could still go to OA? Would it help?
Thanks so much for your time through my long-winded post!
"You can either throw in the towel, or use it to wipe the sweat off your face." - Nike