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Old 02-07-2013, 11:03 PM   #1  
For my future self!
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Cool UGH. Why do I do this?

I am so frustrated! I just weighed myself and I'm only at 177. How am I going to lose 4lbs by the 20th? I feel like I lose weight in super slow motion...a two steps back one step forward type of situation. I know that when the weekend hits I will be back at 180. Then I will start Monday over again with a goal to be back at 177, then next thing you know I will be 5 days away from my monthly challenge (20th of every month) wondering how in the world I will lose 5lbs in 5days. Sorry, had to vent. Sometimes I feel like such a joke.

One of my friends said that she doesn't "get me", she doesn't get how I can workout so hard, lose weight, then over eat. I do it ALL OF THE TIME. I worked out last night, almost passed out from feeling lightheaded, then today after a stressful day at work I ate curly fries and a cheeseburger...then I ate a piece of cheesecake!!! WTH is wrong with me. Does anyone else do this self sabotage dance? I do it every week. One step forward, two large steps back.

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Old 02-08-2013, 06:59 AM   #2  
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I am only stating this because you have posted in the OA section... when you are stressed, do you ask your HP for help in choosing what to eat? Perhaps asking for help would help with making a wise choice of a salad or the lower calorie sandwich and NO FRIES! LOL!
To answer your question... yes, we all do this! Some are just better at asking our HP for help. The ones that are better, are loosing weight! Good luck and I am right there with you!
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Old 02-08-2013, 01:27 PM   #3  
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Yes, I do this sabotage dance. That's why I needed OA and not a pay and weigh program like WW.

I agree with Redhead. Having some practice where I pause and remember something bigger than myself goes a long way toward helping me make good decisions.

I've lost about 60 lbs from my high weight. 40 of those lbs, I lost four years ago, and they've stayed off. I found that the first step for me was not to eliminate any foods, but to add foods. When you say that you are light headed from not eating enough, you're telling me that you've starved yourself. That's a mean thing to do. I used to be mean to my body all the time. I was punishing myself for emotions, for being fat, or just generally not being good enough. Then after the starving, of course I would binge. My body needed the food and binging blindly and thoughtlessly was the only way that I could get it. The first step for me was to allow myself to eat frequent, nourishing meals, no matter how much I exercised and no matter what I had binged on the day before.

Today, I eat four nourishing meals a day, no exceptions, and no snacking in between. More recently, I've given up sugary foods and anything that feels like recreation instead of nourishment. My weight is lowering again, into a range that I am truly happy with.

As for getting yourself down 5 lbs in 12 days... I don't know. If that's really what you want out of life, I wish you well with that goal. That wouldn't be enough for me. I don't want to stop with numbers on a scale, I want a full and rewarding life that doesn't revolve around food. I want friends and family, and a bustling career. I want to feel good about my place in the world. I can't have both. I can't have the life that I want and continue to place all of my focus on that dang contraption in the bathroom that tells me if I'm fat or not. And that's really hard for me to say because I'm very attached to the scale. Its so much easier in the morning to look to the scale to tell me if I've lost weight than to really take stock of my life and decide if I'm happy with the choices I'm making day to day. You have to decide what you really want.
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Old 02-17-2013, 01:48 AM   #4  
For my future self!
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Thank you for your honest words ladies. I don't know why I over eat or why I do "recreational" eating (as blog stated), all I know is that I'm tired of letting food control my life. I've never been to a doctor for this issue. I posted here because I didn't know where else to post my binging concerns.
I'm trying to make a conscious effort towards a healthier lifestyle; I joined Myfitnesspal to track my food intake and I'm becoming honest with my husband about my eating habits. He's very supportive about my goals. He offers to walk with me and offers encouraging words. I hate feeling like I'm letting him down in someway...I dislike the thought of his efforts going unnoticed. I do it for myself, for my husband, and for my future kids (not pregnant) that I will serve as a role model for. Thanks for hearing me out and letting me work through these thoughts with you.
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