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Should I join?

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Old 06-17-2012, 08:50 PM   #1
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Unhappy Should I join?

I know a little bit about OA because my grandmother went years ago. She had horrible issues with food until the day she died. I have a lot of the same issues she has had. I have tried to lose weight so many times. I always gain it back. I am tired of food having such power over my life. The closest meeting to me is an hour away though. I hated the Weight Watchers and the other similar meetings I have tried. I had to weigh in front of people and everyone talked obsessively about the calories in everything and how far below their points they could go each day. It triggered the desire to overeat for me and made me feel so inadequate. I have tried diet pills, and although they did work, it was not good for my mental health. The second time I took them I was suicidal when I stopped. Losing 80 pounds was not worth almost dying for. I just don't want to be on this hamster wheel anymore. I need help.
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Old 06-17-2012, 09:31 PM   #2
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Why not try calorie counting, no meetings to go to and you won't have to weigh in front of anyone and it is free. You need a calorie counting book or you can get one online. It is just a matter of preferance which one you choose. I have done many programs, too and found calorie counting works best for me.You will get lots of support here at 3Fc. Good luck.
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Old 06-17-2012, 11:19 PM   #3
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If you don't like those meetings, they are not for you. Have you tried to lose weight on your own or with a diet buddy? Read the forums, read the blogs and then start slowly, changing small things at a time, so you don't feel deprived. I first dropped sweets, and then cookies, then cheese... and so on. It worked! Trust yourself!
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Old 06-18-2012, 07:15 AM   #4
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You have taken the first step... admitting you are powerless over food! OA would be perfect for you but you don't have to go to a meeting. There are lots of things you can do on line. I read all I can read and you can get some of the books free from the library. Don't give up... you are headed in the right direction!!! Get a buddy too!! That helps me! I'd be willing, just send me an email.
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Old 06-19-2012, 09:20 PM   #5
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I can relate to you all the way.Sounds like my lifetime story.No diet club or book is to be the answer as you've been on every diet and gained the weight back.You don't weigh in at OA.yOU DON'T EVEN HAVE TO SHARE.I have to admit mY EATING HASN'T BEEN GOOD EITHER AND i SHOULD GO TO A MEETING MYSELF.
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Old 06-20-2012, 07:03 AM   #6
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Thank you all. I think I'm going to try some online meetings and read books. I know that I have addiction behaviors towards food. I have been trying to treat the symptom for years (my weight) and I think now it's time to heal the source of the problem.
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Old 06-21-2012, 06:59 AM   #7
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Good for you!! Good luck and remember, if you need an email buddy, I'm here!
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Old 06-21-2012, 07:34 AM   #8
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Thank you so much
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Old 06-22-2012, 06:37 AM   #9
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Great to hear you say that Curvy - the weight really is only the outward sign and it's good to start treating the disease, it's only that way that we can heal ....if it works - then work it
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Old 08-01-2012, 09:42 PM   #10
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Where do you find the books? Thank you.
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Old 08-29-2012, 06:17 AM   #11
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I was glad to discover the URL for the OA website in this forum. I am also super resistant to attending any kind of meeting. I've been to the OA website a couple times to explore and found they have pod casts that I look forward to listening to while I am at work doing some repetitive task that requires minimal concentration. I am an emotional eater and boredom is definitely one of my triggers. Having the pod casts to listen to might help me do a better job surfing the emotional waves. Here's hoping.
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Old 09-11-2012, 02:21 PM   #12
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I also wanted to add that there are phone meetings, which can be found on the OA website.
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Old 09-11-2012, 10:24 PM   #13
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Are there OA programs that aren't religion based? I've tried to find some near me, but all the local meetings are 12-step faith based. Suggestions on alternatives?
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Old 09-13-2012, 05:59 PM   #14
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@hopeforthehopeless, 12-step meetings aren't about any particular religion. The "faith" is basically that there's something more powerful than yourself. You can make that power the OA group itself, if you like. The saying is, "Take what you need, and leave the rest." A great motto! Good luck to you.
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Old 09-26-2012, 12:19 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FirstLove View Post
@hopeforthehopeless, 12-step meetings aren't about any particular religion. The "faith" is basically that there's something more powerful than yourself. You can make that power the OA group itself, if you like. The saying is, "Take what you need, and leave the rest." A great motto! Good luck to you.
They aren't based upon any particular religion, but they are based upon a "higher power." Now, they'll tell you that doesn't mean you have to believe in "god", per se, but the "higher power" thing is kinda meaningless without that. But I do agree you don't need to be the slight bit religious to get something from OA.

Personally, I did not find OA helpful. The whole process involved people sharing their feelings. That's great in order go get things off your chest that you want to share. But OA discourages "cross talk", i.e., discourse among the participants. I would find the meetings much more useful and helpful if there were discussions wherein people could talk about resolving problems -- rather than just sharing with everybody what their problems are.

Regarding the question of should you join. You probably need to attend a few meetings (at least one) to know if it would help you. But just know that you can get a lot of help and support from right here on this very forum. IMHO, I think the support is better than what I ever got from OA.
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