My name is Dianna and this is my first post on this board. I have looked into OA in the past and I keep coming back to it for some reason. I have never been to a meeting whether ftf, phone, or video. I have done the research and I know I have to give this program a try.
I have faith in the 12 step program. My husband is a recovering addict who has been clean for 15 years now thanks to the NA and AA programs. So I know it will work when a person will work it.
I have been overweight my whole life. I have dieted and lost and binged and gained. It is a vicious cycle in my life. I cannot handle restrictive diets for very long before I end up binging. I am a food addict. I will eat for no reason at all. I binge and I feel guilty/ashamed and then I binge again.
Two years ago I had lap band surgery. I thought that having this tool would help me to eat normally. It hasn't. I lost 85 pounds and have been steadily gaining it back in the last six months or so. When I was banded I weighed 441 pounds. That was not my highest weight. My highest was somewhere around 470. I feel like a failure and I'm tired of the feelings of failure, guilt, and shame.
Back to the present. I know that I need to start this program. I have ftf meetings available but they are a 60 mile drive for me to get to them. I am thinking of getting to the first meeting and trying to commit to one ftf meeting a week.
I need to purchase the program books and figure out the eating plan. I have no idea where to start on this.
Should I just get to the first meeting and have them guide me in what I need to work this program successfully? While I am admitting things, I admit that I have no idea how to finish this statement...My name is Dianna and I am a _____ Do I need to be able to finish this statement before I get started?
Thanks for reading and for any advice or tips you might have to offer.