3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community  

Go Back   3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community > Support Forum > Chicks in Control > Overeaters Anonymous

What Does Abstinence Look Like?

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 01-05-2009, 09:02 AM   #1
Eternal Optimist
 
Pinkie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Balmy Minnesota
Posts: 45

S/C/G: 172/166/Fit & Healthy

Height: 5'7"

Default What Does Abstinence Look Like?

My biggest challenge is to NOT diet - and yet not eat compulsively.

I realize that's called abstinence. Can anyone share what their abstinence program looks like, and how they came to find it?

I'm really lost on this one. Abstinence makes so much sense when talking drugs, gambling or alcohol. But we HAVE to eat. I realize that it means sticking to a healthy food plan, but my problem is also the intense "control" over eating. If I religiously stick to a prescribed plan, I'm still practicing this unwanted behavior!

What's the happy medium?
Pinkie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-05-2009, 12:07 PM   #2
Motivated for 2009
 
2ndChance09's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: ID
Posts: 575

S/C/G: 240/200/125

Height: 5'5"

Default

I am wondering about this too.
2ndChance09 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-05-2009, 12:18 PM   #3
Backpedaling!!
 
freshmanweightorbust's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: NC
Posts: 370

S/C/G: 276/250/176

Height: 5'4''

Default

My interpretation was always that you pick certain unhealthy categories and abstain completely from those. For example, my choice for 2009 (among other things) is to abstain from food that is delivered to my door, served buffet-style, or is handed to me through a window. This eliminates all fastfood and almost all pizza and Chinese type stuff. I'm also abstaining from cigarettes and alcohol, and six days a week, I abstain from dessert foods and candies. I don't know if this is what your talking about. It's what seems like it would have to work, inconjunction with the four exercise sessions of 30min to and hour per week.

Good luck to you!
freshmanweightorbust is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-06-2009, 06:00 PM   #4
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 720

Default

Good question and not an easy one to answer. Some people say 3 healthy meals a days with no food in between, or maybe 3 meals of "X" calories and 2 snacks of "Y" calories to get to the number they are aiming for. The goal is not to obsess about the food and that as you noted is the tricky part- when you start going crazy about how many calories are in the food, oh heavens what if you go out to eat and don't know, etc.... What works for me is that all non-starchy vegetables are "free" (old Weight Watcher thinking). That gets me to a stress-free place of knowing that no matter what I don't have to worry about those guys and since I love them it works for me. Then my abstinence consists of lean protein at each meal, and 2 servings of starchy carbs like potato or pasta or rice (preferably whole grain but I don't get nuts about it). No sugar because one cookie or chocolate leads to a gazillion. I do allow stuff like Splenda on a limited basis to soften the edges. The central part is that I have 3 meals a day based on these guidelines and I do NOT skip meals. That leads to deadly thinking for me..."Oh I have not had anything all day, just a taste of this, blah blah blah" As to the overeating part of the compulsion I made myself very familiar with serving sizes though I do not weigh and measure. Sticking to a real serving size is part of it for me. Knowing what the right size is takes away that craziness as well. Good luck. Looking forward to hearing other people's ways.
tommy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-07-2009, 10:49 AM   #5
Senior Member
 
Artemis__'s Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: England
Posts: 346

S/C/G: 211/211/140

Height: 5'4"

Default

Abstinence for me has a few components.

Number 1 is about staying away from my trigger foods. There are things I just can't eat in small amounts or foods that trigger a binge. It's taken me years to get to understand and accept this. There are certain foods that I just cannot eat - they lead to a binge.

Number 2 is eating 3 meals and 3 small snacks, serving size controlled, on a time schedule that I set the day before. (I commit my eating plan to paper each evening, for the next day).

Number 3 is not skipping any of those meals or snacks.

I'd like to make it clear that I am still struggling for consistency in abstinence.. It's something I have to commit to, fully, every single day. I have to remind myself frequently throughout the day that 'Just For Today I will be abstinent'.
__________________
Start BF 38% Goal 25%

5% - 200 -
165 for cruise December 2012.

Artemis__ is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-09-2009, 01:06 AM   #6
Backpedaling!!
 
freshmanweightorbust's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: NC
Posts: 370

S/C/G: 276/250/176

Height: 5'4''

Default

I would just caution you not to look at food as the enemy in and of itself. Food is not the enemy. Worthless calories like you find in fizzy drinks and candy and greasy take-out are bad, but if you get your calories from healthy foods like fruits and vegetables and lean meat, then food is your friend. There are some foods that boost your metabolism and help you to lose weight by burning calories more efficiently.

I don't mean to be trying to mother anybody, but the question you posed weighed on my mind a little in the few days since I responded before, and I can't shake the idea that the concept of food abstinence might very easily lead the way to an eating disorder, and I'd feel so awful if that actually happened to anyone reading this thread and I hadn't said anything.
freshmanweightorbust is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-12-2009, 07:24 AM   #7
Eternal Optimist
 
Pinkie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Balmy Minnesota
Posts: 45

S/C/G: 172/166/Fit & Healthy

Height: 5'7"

Default

Thank you, Freshman and Artemis. Those are both great responses and good food for thought (excuse the pun!).
Pinkie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-30-2009, 05:38 PM   #8
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 20

Default

Hi Pinkie,
I'm new to this, but for me, abstinence is eating 3 meals with nothing in between. I used to think I would DIE if I couldn't snack after work, mid-afternoon, late at night, etc. I remember reading, no one has ever died between meals. How freeing!! Food tastes soooo much better. I'm learning, still, how to control portions, but it is so great to not struggle with non stop snacking. (even diet food became binge food - ex. snacks)

Great post!
luvmyboys is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-2009, 08:02 PM   #9
Member
 
Badgerette's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: So Cal
Posts: 57

S/C/G: 310/250/140

Height: 5'4"

Default

I made a list of All foods I ever binged on and any behaviors tied to binges and not eating these foods or doing these behaviors is my abstinence. Example- no eating sugar right out of the bag, no cheesecake, no cake with bakery icing & no coke, just a few foods of mine.
Behaviors include: no going thru drive thru & ording 2 meals for myself, no eating in my car, no eating in secret
Everyone has a different abstinence. I have been able to maintain mine for 10 months now and everyday is a gift.
Badgerette is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-20-2009, 08:45 PM   #10
Member
 
PleaseLuise's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 54

S/C/G: 275/205/150

Height: 5'5 1/2"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Artemis__ View Post
Number 2 is eating 3 meals and 3 small snacks, serving size controlled, on a time schedule that I set the day before. (I commit my eating plan to paper each evening, for the next day).

Number 3 is not skipping any of those meals or snacks.
What do you do about hunger? What if you are hungry at 11 instead of noon? Or not hungry when it's snack time?
PleaseLuise is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-22-2009, 03:06 AM   #11
Day at a Time
 
hijude's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 257

S/C/G: 242/222/140

Height: 5'2"

Default

I have a physical addiction and a mental obsession. My addiction is not to a particular food but to the behaviour of compulsive overeating.

Abstinence for me is being free from the mental obsession. Living life by spiritual principles. Clearing away the wreakage of the past and not fearing the future. I chose to live in the day and avoid self centeredness/dishonesty/resentment/and fear.

That is my goal each day. Some days I am successful and some not so great.
__________________
hijude is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-2009, 06:04 PM   #12
run4change
 
run4change's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: PNW
Posts: 125

S/C/G: 307.6/184/196

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by hijude View Post
I have a physical addiction and a mental obsession. My addiction is not to a particular food but to the behaviour of compulsive overeating.

Abstinence for me is being free from the mental obsession. Living life by spiritual principles. Clearing away the wreakage of the past and not fearing the future. I chose to live in the day and avoid self centeredness/dishonesty/resentment/and fear.

That is my goal each day. Some days I am successful and some not so great.
Very very well said. Thank you for saying this. It is extrememly helpful for me. I have been wonderding about this same issue
__________________
My blog: http://run4change.wordpress.com
Lost 130 lbs on Weight Watchers and am trying to maintain.
Love running
run4change is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-15-2009, 07:27 AM   #13
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 11

Default

abstinence for me is refraining from eating more calories in a day than my body burns. That means I have to keep track of every calorie i put in my mouth and if i don't know the calorie count on something I don't eat it. This might sound rather daunting and it is at first but after doing it for so long I've gotten pretty good at eyeballing it. I've lost 90lbs with 30 to go.( took 40 years!!!). I know they say don't obsess about the food but that is exactly what I have to do. I think its because I have Adult ADD. Obsessing is the only way I can keep my self from being side tracked.

I think every one at some point in time needs to find out what their daily caloric needs are. Then they have to figure out what healthy foods to eat to get them
to that number. I don't know how anyone could lose weight with out knowing?

I started with the Mayo clinic food plan and it was a good place to start for me.

Good luck

Last edited by jglebtt : 04-18-2009 at 04:35 PM.
jglebtt is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-15-2009, 01:43 PM   #14
Senior Member
 
sweet_talker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: calgary, ab, canada
Posts: 780

Default

Wow those make a lot of sense...I think this has really helped me with what I need to work on. Which would be the eating habits themselves, not just the food. Most importantly:
#1. No eating in secret
#2. No eating late at night (and typically alone)


Thanks ladies.
__________________
-Carey


going to scotland mini-goal >> 132lbs >> april 30

Last edited by sweet_talker : 04-15-2009 at 01:44 PM.
sweet_talker is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-16-2009, 07:55 AM   #15
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 11

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by hijude View Post

"Abstinence for me is being free from the mental obsession."
I've Heard a lot of people say this very statement at OA meetings. I'm just the opposite. For me I have to be abstinent for a couple of days and then the mental obsession slowly gets less and less with each consecutive day that I maintain that abstinence. If I fall off the abstinence wagon the mental obsession comes right back.

90lbs gone 30 to go
jglebtt is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Posts by members, moderators and admins are not considered medical advice
and no guarantee is made against accuracy.


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 07:36 PM.






Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.3.2