[daizy hotrocks]

I am feeling very strong about program after MONTHS of uncertainty, ups and downs, and weight gain.

All of these good feelings are coming after another part of my life that has been really rocky is getting better. I have had some problems with my boyfriend for months and started seeing a therapist, was diagnosed with situational depression and started anti-depressants. Our relationship came to a head and an ultimatum was given. This has caused a big change in the way our relationship has been going and things are looking really good.

This is exciting and at the same time worries me. My eating is very emotional, I have learned that, but I am afraid that I am only doing well because the thing that has been shaking up my life is getting better.

Does this mean that every time something bad happens I will loose control of my eating. I feel weak and afraid that I am out of control and that the situations of my life will determine what I eat, not me.

Any thoughts???

[Joy2MeNu]

Oh Daizy, Wow. This is some really serious and heavy subject matter dearest. Really hard to have any simple answers. I am happy the relationship is doing better, but I hate that you have had to begin depression medication in the process. I know some anti-depressants can be wonderful in the beginning and even assist in weight loss on the short term, but in the long term can often do the very opposite. Hopefully you can address the depression with life and activity and exercise. If the boyfriend causes you any further grief, then please put yourself first. Don't stay with him if he causes you to question yourself and your worthiness in any way. No one should ever make you feel weak and out of control. From your posts, you never sound out of control, but rather confident and determined. That is what I hope for you always.

Anyway, the best thing I can do is refer you to this article I sent to my daughter some time ago. She also takes some depression medication and I am so worried for her.

TITLE: The MOST Effective Treatment for Depression Isn't Drugs... But You'll Never Hear That From Your Psychiatrist

http://articles.mercola.com/sites/ar...interview.aspx

[Hvnlymzic]

Daisy, as with any other "crutch" people use to get through things, we have to learn to control what we eat. I'm an emotional eater sometimes and I also eat out of boredom. I've had to just learn to identify when i'm eating for the wrong reasons. I've had to make myself stop and think, "why am i eating this piece of candy? do I really want to eat it, or am i eating it because i have nothing better to do?". The last few months have been slow for my weight loss for several reasons, but mostly it's because I haven't been thinking. I'll eat before thinking about it. Thats one thing that I like about MRC. It makes me think about my food. Whether it's how I'm preparing it, or how much of it I can eat, I have to actually think about the food. It's not a grab something and eat scenario...I have to plan ahead and think think think.

I think I had a food addiction and I can't stop eating entirely, so I have to learn to manage it. You make a good point. We have to control what we eat, not let our situations control what we eat. Engage the mind and separate the food from the situation. Hang in there Daisy

[thinknthin]

After going to years and years of WW's meetings, one thing that I heard and that stuck in my head was about emotional eating. The answer to your problems/worries/emotions is not in the fridge or cupboards. Some members even wrote that inside their cabinets to remind them--"the answer is not here". I use this saying when I am searching for something to eat. I want to eat not because I'm hungry but because I'm trying to fill some kind of emotional void. Hope this may be helpful.

[Hvnlymzic]

Wow..."The answer is not in here". How brilliant is that?!?! Doing it today. On a bright neon note card.

[haibiss]

Food is a battle for those like us. We emotionally eat, not just when we are depressed, lonely and bored, but also when we were happy, celebrating, excited.
I have been down the depression road a couple of times and have learned that they are a great temporary helper, but the change had to come from inside.
I have left messages, in my cabinets about am I really hungry - that worked a little, but on really stressful days I would just ignore it. I don't keep anything that is a quick fix around the house - if it is going to take me 10 mins to fix it and I don't want it then I am not really that hungry. Also, and I know it is extreme but I have a photo of me in a swimsuit around in stratigic places - on the fridge(behind some other things but I can still see my head and I know what is hidden) - in the pantry, and trust me that makes me rethink everything going in my body.