You can do all you chose to do. It sounds like you are feeling lonely in a huge city. That can be hard when you are trying to make such life altering changes. We all need some affirmation that we are making the right changes during this process. So here we are, your online buddy system!
Remember, you are worth obtaining all you dream of for yourself. You are a beautiful, intelligent human being and making the choice to make yourself healthier is comfirmation of that fact. Think of this weight as a heavy blanket that sheilds the wonderful person you are from the world, trips you up when walking up/down the stairs and prevents you from doing things you want to do. Would you keep the blanket on? Put another on top of it? No, you would throw that useless stupid thing down on the ground and do the things you have been missing out on!
You have already gone through this once. This does not mean you failed, it just means you might not have made the necessary changes, mentally or emotionally, you need in order to get to your goal. Someone once wrote if you fell walking up the stairs, would you throw youself to the bottom and say you just can't do it or would you brush yourself off and continue walking up?
You are already thinking toward success, your name says it. Now, you need a plan.
1. Write down what you want to achieve with your weight loss. Include things you look forward to doing or things you want to get rid of. One of mine was sitting on my knees without my legs going numb!
2. Write another list of what you will miss most on the diet, then write what you will gain. This could be reduced risk of diabetes, heart problems, and joint problems. These things could lead to major medical issues and even death. Compare that to a slice of cheesecake or whatever is on your miss list.
3. Post these in the places you are most tempted. Add to it as things come up. Make them living documents and read them when you are tempted.
4. Throw out all things that are not on plan. Especially if you live alone. You have no need for it!
5. Start at day one. Be determined that you will succeed because you are worth it.
6. Read the MRC threads, Dog days of August is our main thread and then find stuff from there.
Is this diet hard? Yes and you know that. Does it work? Yes and you know that too. Can you do this? Absolutely!
I can't wait to hear all your success!