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Old 04-02-2013, 02:08 AM   #1  
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So I have some good friends who have been helping me clean my closet - figure out how to present and dress myself better. They are amazed that although I appear to wear crap daily (I do! I am a sneakers and t-shirt kind of girl), I really do have some nice things and I really would like to present myself better.

The big question though - is that some of the things they want me to wear I think are too small. By "too small", I don't mean busting at the seams ... I mean they are more form fitting which means showing stomach rolls etc. The friends think these things look better than the oversized stuff I currently wear. I personally, don't think I've lost enough weight to wear these things.

Obviously, I need to feel comfortable - and that is important. But should I be pushing myself a little out of my comfort zone and wear tighter looking clothes that my friends swear look good on me? (I trust these people). How comfortable are you showing your figure? Do you think people look better in figure showing clothes than they do in bigger things that hide more lumps and bumps?
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Old 04-02-2013, 03:32 AM   #2  
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I personally find when I look at the mirror.. I see all the faults because that's what I am looking for. Im not comfortable wearing tight clothes or anything because when I do I look in the mirror and I'm like Gosh you ate all the pies haha but truth of the matter is, we see our faults because we know they are there but other people (most people) don't look or judge us that way. I would trust them, being your friends they would know how you feel and have felt about your weight and wouldn't tell you something didnt look nice if they didnt think it would Sorry bit of a ramble but hopefully somewhere it makes sense.
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Old 04-02-2013, 04:22 AM   #3  
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I think the most important thing is for YOU to be comfortable, whatever that means for you

When I wear clothes that are too form fitting, I'm really self conscious all day and have the urge to run home and change. I like clothes that skim the body, u see your curves but not your rolls lol, yes, there is a difference :hugs:

Last edited by Smuffer; 04-02-2013 at 04:24 AM.
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Old 04-02-2013, 04:31 AM   #4  
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IMO, when you look at yourself, you scrutinize and see every lump and bump and imperfection. When other people look at you, it's often just a passing glance that sees a general shape. When you wear clothing that is too loose, people register your shape as "fat, shapeless, blob." When you more form-fitting clothing, they see you as smaller. Just remember, though, that there's a big difference between "form-fitting" and "sausage casing"!
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Old 04-02-2013, 06:04 AM   #5  
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I completely agree with Novus. I used to wear really baggy clothes, but what it did was hide my relatively slim waist. It's more important to emphasise the positive than to cover up the negative. Really.
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Old 04-02-2013, 07:03 AM   #6  
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I battle with this all the time. I love my hourglass shape, but I find my form fitting clothes showcase my belly rolls. I don't know what to say, just exercise. Exercise makes me feel skinnier and more confident than I really am.
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Old 04-02-2013, 07:45 AM   #7  
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I guess I would trust your friends' advice. but I struggle daily with this too! if something feels form-fitting to me, I feel fat. If something is loose, I feel sloppy. WTH.
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Old 04-02-2013, 08:12 AM   #8  
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I'm having the same struggle. I have a blouse that I bought a few weeks ago that is a color combination that just makes my eyes and hair pop. It also emphasizes my boobage. When I modeled it for my husband, he lit up like a Christmas tree. The problem, though, is that it is very form fitting across my belly. Hubby and my best friend don't even see that but I still haven't worn it outside of the house because I feel like mah belleh is on parade when I wear it.
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Old 04-02-2013, 08:27 AM   #9  
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I think loose clothing tends to make you look a lot bigger than you are. I've always worn fitted/semi-fitted clothes but do my best to prevent muffin tops on my jeans.
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Old 04-02-2013, 08:46 AM   #10  
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It's hard to find a balance. I gravitate towards floppy t shirts and sweatshirts to hide my imperfections. But, I know I look better when my clothes are more fitted.

I think if you like the way your friends look, you can trust their advice. If you regularly look at them and cringe thinking, "She shouldn't be wearing that," then maybe not.

My mom is my go to for telling me what I can pull off and what I can't, I know she isn't going to lie to me and let me look ridiculous. But, even if she tells me it looks good, if I feel horribly self conscious and I find myself trying to cover myself with my arms and tugging on my clothes, I change. Confidence is the most attractive thing a woman of any size can wear.
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Old 04-02-2013, 08:52 AM   #11  
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I had lost some weight in college and had a similar situation. Some friends took me shopping and bought me pants that were much more form fitting than I was used to, and in truth, fit me quite well. I had a hard time with the concept as I also tried to hide in baggy clothes. Looking back at photos, I looked so much better in the proper sized clothing.

You mentioned being pushed out of your comfort zone. I think a little pushing is fine, but of course you don't want to be terribly uncomfortable. Maybe try wearing one form-fitting clothing item at a time and see you how you feel. I agree with novus, there is a difference between form fitting and sausage casing, but I don't think your friends would steer you wrong. Perhaps look at what they wear. If they look nice in their clothes, perhaps it's worth taking advice from them.
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Old 04-02-2013, 09:05 AM   #12  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by VermontMom View Post
I guess I would trust your friends' advice. but I struggle daily with this too! if something feels form-fitting to me, I feel fat. If something is loose, I feel sloppy. WTH.
I agree with VermontMom, try and trust your friends advice.

It's hard for me to get used to my new body. It's like I am meeting it for the first time! Congrats on your weightloss!
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Old 04-02-2013, 09:11 AM   #13  
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Yup! This is me. I hate it when my shirts are too tight across my belly. I have a little bit of a waist, when you look at me from the front, but from the side, I'm ALL belly. I have lots of tops that I wear that are mostly flattering, but then I throw a hoodie over top so my belly isn't hanging out! I will even wear a short sleeved hoodie in the summer to hide my belly! I generally wear my pants below my belly too, otherwise I feel like I am being cut off in the middle, so shirts are never long enough to hide my stomach hanging over my pants and out from under shirts!

Wear what makes you comfortable. You are going to look better wearing something with confidence, than wearing something that you will be uncomfortable in and constantly adjusting.

Last edited by Silverfire; 04-02-2013 at 09:14 AM.
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Old 04-02-2013, 10:43 AM   #14  
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Thanks for all the great advice. These friends are trustworthy in this regard - one is just this super classy type that is sort of a mentor to me who always looks professional and impeccable. I thinkI'll start slow with a happy compromise- try not to wear such baggy things but find the comprimise between form fitting and covering my stomach rolls in a way that makes me feel confident.

I do think though that if they say these things look fine - I should push myself to become more confident wearing them! I'm not sure how to find that confidence but will try.
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Old 04-02-2013, 12:54 PM   #15  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Novus View Post
IMO, when you look at yourself, you scrutinize and see every lump and bump and imperfection. When other people look at you, it's often just a passing glance that sees a general shape. When you wear clothing that is too loose, people register your shape as "fat, shapeless, blob." When you more form-fitting clothing, they see you as smaller. Just remember, though, that there's a big difference between "form-fitting" and "sausage casing"!
I agee 100%! Baggy clothes aren't flattering on anyone. Your clothes should accentuate your body. However, you shouldn't feel uncomfortable. I guess you have to find that balance.
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