Allison-- I wouldn't return to that doctor if I were you! Crazy!
Andrea-- hope you feel in a better place soon.
I'm just happy my book fair is over. Mostly. They still have to pick it up, I have to do the financials, and lots of odds and ends to get to.
Dh came home Saturday and it was great to have him home, but he leaves Thursday for a month-- he's never gone that long but he has an Asia trip and a Europe trip, and it doesn't make sense to come home between them for a day. The upside is he will see both of his brothers and their families-- one lives in Hong Kong and the other in London.
Off to figure out what end is up after the past week....
Andrea - I tend to lean to the negative, too. That was what pulled me to this thread title. Don't beat yourself up - you are doing all that you can. There are only so many minutes in a day.
Dagmar -glad you liked the movie!
Michele - I'm so glad you are okay. I've been worried this weekend. And glad DH is home for a few days.
I started this post two hours ago and forgot to submit it...
I have been craving a cajun chicken biscuit from Bojangles for the last several weeks, and have found myself eating too many calories of "healthy" things to try to fill the gap. That hasn't fixed it, so this morning I let myself have a biscuit for breakfast. I enjoyed it, and now I'm not making myself crazy.
Last edited by Shannon in ATL; 10-16-2017 at 12:02 PM.
Andrea, ugh. A center grant is such a burden with so many "moving parts" to turn into a cohesive structure. On top of long clinic hours too - I completely understand how peanut butter and chocolate become attractive; better than no self-care at all.
Jessica, that's exactly where I am (and I suspect where many of us are). I can effortlessly maintain one weight, but the calorie restriction required to drop even slightly below seems mathematically excessive.
We were watching Bob's Burgers last night. In the episode Bob (a natural curmudgeon) was resistant to the effects of a cheesy inspirational poster that said "today is tomorrow's yesterday", until his diner was busy one day and he was in the weeds. He looked up in the midst of frying a hundred burgers and saw the poster, and it gave him the strength to continue. I'm like Bob; mantras and self-help wisdom don't appeal to me until I'm stressed or sad enough to need them. The fires in northern CA have affected so many friends at this point that every time I looked on facebook I read about someone else who has lost their house, or is mourning a neighbor's death. I find myself reading inspirational sayings to try and get out of the depression. Yesterday I went for a long run and cried most of the way (I suspect a strong PMS influence there); it did make me feel better.
On the plus side, the community response is strong. The fundraising page to help my classmate who lost her home and clinic made $15,000 in the first 24 hours - awesome! And my best friend (another large animal vet) was at the fairgrounds doing medical care for evacuated animals, and there was a literal mountain of hay that had been donated, plus giant piles of big water bottles and tables of human food. My friend said it restored her faith in humanity, to be there and watch the donors and volunteers stream in.
I'm feeling like I'm going to be admonished by the stranger at the Health Fair today who will take my blood pressure, blood sample, and weigh me.
I'm starting to get nervous about teaching in the Onboarding class next week for a day and a half. I've done this before and I am always full of anxiety and then once I'm in front the class, it's okay, and I am elated and feel powerful when it's done. But it seems I have to go through that whole cycle. This time I'm anxious because the lesson plan & content has completely changed.
Jessica, that's exactly where I am (and I suspect where many of us are). I can effortlessly maintain one weight, but the calorie restriction required to drop even slightly below seems mathematically excessive.
Yes, this is exactly my problem! I'm comfortable eating 1500-1800 calories/day with occasional indulgences, and that will maintain my current weight. To lose, I need to drop below 1300 reliably every day. I know that I can do it. I've done it before. It's just the starting curve of it that I need to get over. It's trying to ride your bike up a really steep hill, knowing that as soon as you get over the hill it's all flat or a decline. I know that if I can get under 1300 for 1-2 weeks, then I'll be "in the zone" and be able to continue to lose as long as nothing disrupts my routine. But those 1-2 weeks are going to be really unpleasant, and I keep putting them off. (And I *know* they're going to be unpleasant, because I've gone through them enough times now. The first two weeks totally suck.)
Anyway I violated my own mini-goal last night, which I'm pretty sure is because the stuffed eggplant DH made for dinner was not very filling. Hopefully not being filling means it also didn't have a lot of calories, but who knows. At least I went to the gym yesterday.
Dh and I bought a new car last night! He test drove it so I didn't try it out personally until this morning on my way to work (in the dark). I'll have fun figuring out all the features!
He leaves tomorrow for what must be his longest trip ever-- he's combining a Europe trip with an Asia trip so he'll be gone a month. I'll have plenty of "me" time-- time to focus on healthy habits before the holidays hit.
Grazing has crept into my life and it's really not needed. I'm on a mission to eradicate it and that includes having meals I really enjoy, enough rest, and a few other things, I expect. I'm going to be concentrating on my food much more.
Michele, what a good idea to get those healthy habits anchored into place now. I'm with you.
saef, you're packed with muscle. Of course you're into overweight on the BMI chart which is "appropriate for population studies and inappropriate for individual evaluation" according to Ancel Keys and the great Wikipedia. What's your waist measurement like?
Got to go. Have a good day, everyone.
Last edited by silverbirch; 10-19-2017 at 06:40 AM.
Good point about the BMI Birchie. I have been overweight for years if using that as a guide. I'm not though. I have a lot of muscle.
Maybe there should be an overhaul of some of the yardsticks used to measure healthy weight?
I have been eating sugary stuff before bed to counteract the crash from all the caffeine I've been using to get through the day.
Didn't last night and slept about an hour more than I have been. So far I've avoided going back on the energy drinks roller coaster and I'm actively trying to stay away from that.
Too much work and no help from DH who has been putting in 10-12 hours at his new job every day. Not his fault but I have no one else who can help me with the house and pets. I envy people with children - live in help!
I hope DH's work crunch ends soon. We've had great weather so far and I haven't had the cold and rain to contend with but that's not going to last much longer. I'm trying to get the garden wrapped up - 5-10 minutes of work at a time - by the end of this week. That will relieve a bit of pressure on what is going to be a last week of October.
I'm determined that Halloween is going to be a pleasure for me, rather than one more chore to drag myself through.
My mother called. I'd been avoiding talking with her for about three weeks. She said she'd be arriving today while I'm in CT. I asked her to hold off until Friday, when I'm working from home. I forgot that she wanted to visit for about a week during a time when I don't have any days off.
I do have muscles that I didn't have before, Birchie. Arms, shoulders, glutes and particularly in my back. Unfortunately this hasn't been very good for the fit of shirts.
Not doing too well with my plan not to snack after dinner. I haven't been eating a *lot*, just a piece of string cheese or something similar, but still. Weight still the same and I made it to the gym twice this week, so I guess that's okay.
My aunt died this morning. My mother's baby sister, only 60 years old. She had cancer, but none of us knew. She's ignored all the signs, and the softball sized lump on her breast that was black, hard to the touch, and with the texture of an orange peel. She blacked out Monday and fell in front of my grandfather and he dragged her to the doctor on Tuesday. They sent her to the hospital in an ambulance, and last night her organs stayed shutting down. The cancer was everywhere - liver, lymph system, kidneys. She just stopped. My mom is a nurse, my cousins wife if a nurse, she had insurance, she could have talked to someone and gotten medical care. Instead, we discover she's been cancelling doctor visits for over a year because she didn't want to face it. And now she's gone at 60 years old. I'm angry with her. Which sounds harsh when I say it, so in struggling with it. But, I'm still angry. My grandmother has dementia,and hasn't always in the last year remembered she was her daughter, she was that sweet woman who she went to stay with while my grandfather worked. This morning as soon as she saw my mother she asked what had happened to her baby.
last week of October.
