I think the golf tournament definitely counts as exercise, Allison.
High five, Jessica!
Michele - I would love to go to Monterey.
First day back is exciting. We moved into our new offices the day before I left, so this is also my first day at the new office. I want to be back on vacation.
I've been trying to not veer badly off target while dealing with the usual neverending pile of work. On the plus side, I was awarded an internal "discovery" grant so that's a win... except that it adds a lot of work for a new research project on top of my current (federal) research program. So the next few years look to be even crazier than this one, which I really can't imagine given how everything is going right now. Does anyone else feel that their current way of life is unsustainable long-term? There are only so many hours in a day (and night, and weekend) to work. And it's never enough.
I hadn't weighed myself or even looked in a full-length mirror for weeks, then I had my annual mini-physical at work today. I'm up to 141 and to be honest I'm glad it's not more. I'm pretty sure that is real weight gain, not water or a massive dinner the night before, but it's OK. I am learning to cut myself some slack wherever possible, since it is impossible with work. Of course, I'm afraid of allowing too much slack in my weight yo-yo string.
Congrats, JZJ, on the Discovery grant!!! The downside is that it sounds like your life is crazy-making. Can you hire a few interns to offload any of your work?
I live an unsustainable lifestyle sometimes, depending on the project at work. That's pretty rare (but it has happened) since DD was born and my employer let me go half-time. Unlike the full time employees, when I work more I get paid more (until I hit 40 hours).
Allison, that golf tourney sounds like a lot of exercise (and fun)!
Shannon and Michele, hope you had great trips! I am looking forward to having the slack to think about traveling again starting next summer (DD is a senior).
My life, as it is currently, is pretty sustainable. I get about 7 hours of sleep a night. I work about 9 hours a day. I get home in time to feed and clean up after all the animals, disinfect the kitchen and get dinner started before DH gets home. I get a few hours of relaxation before bed and I get my exercise done in the mornings. All that is pretty good. That said, when an extra activity is entered into the picture it disrupts all that is the "norm" and throws off the entire schedule. Right now I need to do some extracurricular shopping to prepare for three November birthdays that we're going to SLC to celebrate. Cards are the necessary minimum. I seriously don't know when I'll fit it in!
My life is sustainable most of the time.... not when I'm sick though. I hope this nasty cold leaves soon as I'm feeling worse instead of better. Ugh. I'm back to my redline this morning but not sure what tomorrow will show as dh wants to go out. He leaves Saturday for China and will be gone for over 3 weeks, so I want to spend some time with him before he goes. Just wish I felt better.
Yes, I feel my current way of life is unsustainable long-term.
I disappeared into work on a massive document written in Japanese English, which I worked on all weekend. They've come back with further edits and even more new text.
I want my weekends back.
I'm not sure I am getting enough love in return to keep doing this.
I'm not sure I am getting enough love in return to keep doing this.
Ditto and ditto. Which begs the question, why do we keep this up? Is the reward just the satisfaction of doing a hard job well? If so, I may be ready to trade that particular reward for some life balance. Tenure shmenure.
At the end of life, no one says, "I wish I had skipped the beach more often and spent more time sitting at my desk working."
Why do we keep it up? I'm thinking it's because we were conditioned from a young age to work for achievement and to put our own needs second. This wasn't because the rewards were so wonderful--but it prepared us to be the good worker-bee employees that society needs. And now, it's second nature for us to do this. Knee-jerk achievers.
And then some people find they're stuck in a consumer trap that puts us into debt and means they have to keep on working.
I've asked the 'why do we keep this up' question more than once myself over the years, both in my job and now with DH and the position he has been in for the last year. I am the only one in my department so I get a lot of calls all the time - nights, weekends, holidays. This vacation in Mexico was the first time in seven years that I went more than 24 hours without an outside of work call. It was fabulous. DH now gets calls at night and on weekends as well, which he never did before. You know what? I really enjoyed the beach without my phone. On the one hand, I didn't have my camera to take pictures every minute. On the other, I didn't have anything to focus on but sand and sun and fun. I want to find that balance - and if my company goes the way I think it will with upcoming health insurance decisions I will want it even more.
I have a reasonable life balance except when I'm dogsitting. I am giving up the two worst dog sitting clients (am with one set of dogs 'til Sunday) and that is an economic loss that is more than balanced out by the gains I make by losing these two sets of dogs. Too long and complicated to explain the situations of both these dog sits but I decided the money wasn't worth the stress.
I have times when I am busy but less and less of them. I have learned to recognize "problem" clients and to pass them on and I also say "no" to my regular clients occasionally.
A good example of the balance I'm trying to achieve is this coming Monday. I'm taking the day off to welcome Trixie, placate Natalie, and get caught up on all the domestic stuff I couldn't do while dogsitting. DH was kind of shocked that I'd do this but I take a sick day or extra day off about once every 5 years.
I don't want Trixie's first day to be mostly spent alone or only seeing a tired frazzled me at the end of the day. I want her to feel welcome.
That said I do have to go and do one dog walk that day with a new client's dog and with a dog I'm walking for another walker who's away on vacation. But it won't be a frantic day.
Why do we keep it up? I'm thinking it's because we were conditioned from a young age to work for achievement and to put our own needs second. This wasn't because the rewards were so wonderful--but it prepared us to be the good worker-bee employees that society needs. And now, it's second nature for us to do this. Knee-jerk achievers.
And then some people find they're stuck in a consumer trap that puts us into debt and means they have to keep on working.
That definitely applies to me. In our family, to have worked hard all one's life is the greatest achievement possible. Of course, prior to my parents' generation, they were all subsistence farmers and constant hard work was inevitable. Education was (and still is for some family members) a luxury they couldn't afford, and consequently education is also considered a privilege and not taken for granted. It explains a lot about the path I've taken, now that I think about it. Is free will something that has to be deliberately and constantly exercised to overcome the early conditioning we receive?
Sorry to have wandered so far off-topic for this thread... but it does vaguely relate to taking care of one's self and how to put health ahead of accomplishments in the list of priorities.
I don't think it's off-target at all, JayZeeJay. Most of the members of my mom's family have been "super achievers" - mayor, superintendent, directors, principals, head coaches. "Living up to your potential" has been an awfully big piece of baggage to carry around, but all it really took to jettison it was to redefine the phrase in my own head. And then, just as you said, to exercise the free will to pursue happiness. Come to think of it, happiness doesn't have to be pursued. Great quote: "Success is having what you want. Happiness is wanting what you have." It's looking beyond the conditioning, certainly.
Last edited by ICUwishing; 10-23-2014 at 03:43 PM.
It is completely possible that my body is an achievement, a visible sign of my work ethic and discipline, and also a signifier of having made it into a certain social class -- and that it's meant to look as unlike the bodies of certain women in my family as possible. I wanted a very different life from theirs.
What an experience..I know I have lost weight,but have been making do with my old smallest clothes even if they are quite loose and comfortable.I also got a pair of skinny jeans at Value Village(second hand)in size 6.They are tight but jeans are supposed to be tight...right?We are talking Canadian sizes.
I was actually shocked when I went new clothes shopping and had to get a size 8 in new pants.Even a 6 fit but I felt better with an 8.Before dieting I had trouble getting a 14 over my thighs.My thinnest pants that I was wearing are a loose 12.Even my thunderthighs are thinner.What an exhilarating feeling to easily slide on a size 8 dresspant and I need a belt for the waist.
I feel pretty....oh so pretty...
Back at 160 this week. Sigh. I didn't think I'd done too badly, though I did have a pack of peanut m&m's and a couple drinks in the evenings. I know I could lose this weight faster if I buckled down and really worked at it but I just can't bring myself to do it. I'm sick of looking like I'm pregnant but the thought that I have to lose another 25lbs is really overwhelming to me. Somehow it seems much larger than the fact that I already lost 12. I think it's because I remember how many things I had to decline to get to my goal weight, and I really kind of like not worrying that much about my food. Also, I'm worried that even if I lose the weight my body won't be the same shape as before the kids and I'll have to buy a whole new wardrobe.
It doesn't help that this week work was so busy I had to skip my planned workouts two days (skip my lunch break entirely, that is). I have been doing decently well at getting exercise even if it hasn't been super intensive.
busy but less and less of them. I have learned to recognize "problem" clients and to pass them on and I also say "no" to my regular clients occasionally.
