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Old 02-18-2013, 10:36 PM   #286
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Some days, it helps for me to look at something like this: http://www.elephantjournal.com/2013/...-foods-photos/

Sheila, I just bought and downloaded the Brain Over Binge book to my Kindle and started reading. I totally agree with one of her basic premises, which is that "it's about the food" - that for many folks, binging behavior has no deep-seated roots in psychological woes, but represents a simple desire for the pleasure of the taste/mouthfeel/satiety/brain chemical changes that the food provides. I will have to see whether her OTHER premise is true for me- that I can turn off binging behavior simply by understanding -and not giving in- to the automatic habit part of my brain. For the moment, the binging has burned itself out for me the way it usually does- I am up 3 pounds and fear + self-loathing are keeping me out of the kitchen.

Sheila, I am a geriatric neurologist. I see many patients with dementia, and also a lot who have gait and balance issues.
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Old 02-19-2013, 09:31 AM   #287
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Back from Santa Fe, I find that, of course, I've **lost weight** during the trip, despite my fears to the contrary.

I didn't go to the gym, but we walked every day around the city or around historic sites. We also had such irregular meal times that it made me nervous, since I'm like a lab rat used to timed and measured feedings. But apparently other people want breakfast at 9 AM, nothing till 3 PM, when we stopped at a Dairy Queen for nostalgia's sake, and everyone else got Blizzards or ice cream while I drank a huge cup of unsweetened iced tea. And then dinner at a Mexican restaurant at about 8 PM.

I was so much hungrier than they were, partly because I wasn't eating cashew brittle or leftover Valentine's Day chocolates or sopaipillas dripping with honey, and because I sat on my hands at the start of meals while everyone else dragged corn chips through tableside gaucamole and pico de gallo. I did eat some great Mexican food but I asked a lot of questions before making my choices. The food always has the same elements, it seems, like red and green chili sauce, cheese, beans, posole, maybe meat, corn or flour tacos, so to unschooled me, all the menu items look the same, but they are combined differently, with emphasis on different ingredients or prepared slightly differently. Anyway, I think I ate interestingly, but in a much more restrained way than my compadres, except our naturally thin friend, whose habits were birdlike. I felt like a feigned version of her.

Oh, and I drank & drank & drank. I mean, not alcoholic beverages, since I passed up the margaritas that everyone else was getting. I just mean cold fluids. I couldn't stop drinking whenever the opportunity presented itself. That must be due to desert living or the altitude or something.

Thus the scale reading this morning. Living on other peoples' eating schedules and watching my intake and always feeling just a little hungry seems to take me lower than my own ostensibly healthy daily habits. What does this mean? What?
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Old 02-19-2013, 10:14 AM   #288
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Thanks, Andrea--that must be tough to deal with dementia patients and especially their families. My neuro is a movement disorder specialist. The brain is a mysterious thing. I hope Brain Over Binge can help.

Saef, not sure what it means, but good on you for keeping everything in check while on vacation. Just curious, do you feel "sad" that you can't let go, or does it make you feel more in control? I often feel kind of sad that I can't let myself eat like others on vacation (although too often I do).
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Old 02-19-2013, 10:53 AM   #289
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Saef-- glad you did so well. I'm sure the scale is down because you were hyper vigilant in your choices, plus you didn't have your regular snacks. I know that when I travel, I often don't have my usual snacks, so even if my meals are higher in calories, it often evens out.

Also, who knows what the altitude can do with the scale, hydration, etc.
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Old 02-19-2013, 10:58 AM   #290
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Forgot to mention that I am smack dab on my redline today (125.0).
I feel like it is a precipice that I can so easily fall over.....
Yet, to emerge under it is like digging out of quicksand....

I'm going to be the little engine that could this week... I think I can... I think I can.... I think I can....
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Old 02-19-2013, 11:14 AM   #291
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Originally Posted by Sheila53 View Post
Saef, not sure what it means, but good on you for keeping everything in check while on vacation. Just curious, do you feel "sad" that you can't let go, or does it make you feel more in control? I often feel kind of sad that I can't let myself eat like others on vacation (although too often I do).
I do not feel sorry for myself. I feel sort of stoic and matter-of-fact. Like, "Them's the breaks of genetics and one's metabolism. I let myself get extremely fat, it altered my body forever, making it far easier for me to regain, I'm more vulnerable than they are to the effects of these foods, and now I have to live with the consequences of my choices."

And Michele's right, too, about the lack of snacks and probably the effects of dehydration, as I could not believe my ability to drink down a Big Gulp-sized unsweetened tea or Diet Pepsi, which I'd usually be able to make last for over an hour.
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Old 02-19-2013, 11:36 AM   #292
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Hi there, everyone. I've been reading the last week or so, but running so behind I didn't have time to do much more than a flyby post.

I am back at 141.5 today, after being down to 137.5 last week. I'm hoping it is water retention and stress. Let me explain...

Two weeks ago I had a great week, exercised on track every day, ate well within my calorie limits every day even with a birthday party for my MIL, things were great. That Thursday the 7th I found out I could refinance my house and save $375 month on my house payment. Two days of paperwork flurry ensued. The weekend was good that weekend, got in exercise and food even with DSS over which often torpedoes my schedule.

Then the week of the 11th started. I had a half marathon scheduled for 2/17, so was planning a taper week but had exercise and diet planned. Then my MIL fell down the stairs and hurt herself, stress. Then I had to go to two unexpected seminars at work on health care, a topic on which I disagree with the mainstream climate here in the red state of GA, stress. Then a few other things at work got our of control, ended up with a new phone as I didn't answer my work phone enough and we needed to make sure it worked, stress. Then my mother's birthday party on Saturday with fried chicken and homemade cheesecake and caramel sauce, stress. I ended up with very little exercise during the week (though still 4 of 7 days in the week with the half on Sunday), and most days in the 2000-2200 calorie range.

Then my half marathon on Sunday. I was less prepared than I could have been and wasn't expecting a PR, but wasn't expecting what happened. My IT band started to twinge at 4 miles, then really shut down after mile 7. I ended up walking most of the last half of the race. Took me just under 3 hours to finish, and I was pretty upset about it. But, as the very sweet woman who handed me a medal at the end said "at least you finished, and you look great". I'm trying to remember that and not beat myself up. The entire right side of my body hurt most of the day yesterday - I think when the IT band started to fail I tried to compensate, so I ended up with my right foot hurting, my right hip and even my right shoulder. I feel better today, but at one point on Sunday I could hardly walk. I wasn't at all prepared for that.

Then we went to see my MIL after the race, and she was in much worse shape after a week than I was prepared for, stress.

So yesterday I had pizza for lunch and didn't move enough, and I'm tired and hormonal and out of sorts, and trying to remember that just because last week wasn't what I expected that I sill exercised more than half the days in the week and finished a half marathon, so can't be all bad, right?
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Old 02-19-2013, 11:56 AM   #293
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Ouch Shannon! I'm surprised you finished. Please take care of yourself and don't be too hard on yourself.

I also have a story to share that may help you and the other (struggling) maintainers to put things into perspective. I have an event to go to Friday night (a dinner/dance/auction for my school). I am bound and determined not to buy something new (or maybe I will...hee...hee), so I went through my closet last night trying on dresses. I have had a dress hanging in my closet for at least a few years that still has the tag on it. I remember buying it from my school's online auction sight unseen. It is a pretty little black dress but when I got it home I was dismayed to realize it was WAY too small for me. Embarrassed, I put it in my closet and it got buried in there. Every once in a while I would look at it and wonder if it would ever fit. Last night I decided to try it on. It was HUGE on me. GIGANTIC, falling off, HUGE. I must have bought it before I lost my weight, or during my weight loss, but I had lost track of how many years ago it was bought. Now I don't know what to do with it because hopefully it will NEVER fit. It kind of struck me as I stood looking in the mirror how far I have come, and that when I feel "fat" it is all relative. Now to see about finding a new dress for Friday.....
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Old 02-19-2013, 12:03 PM   #294
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Originally Posted by saef View Post
Thus the scale reading this morning. Living on other peoples' eating schedules and watching my intake and always feeling just a little hungry seems to take me lower than my own ostensibly healthy daily habits. What does this mean? What?
I have often wondered this too, to no avail. Why do some vacations cause the scale to go lower? It usually coincides with "busy" vacations with friends, where we are walking a lot and/or being active, and even though there might be larger and off-plan meals, snacks are less frequent. When I was 15 I went to Italy and though I ate plenty of (small cups) of gelato and ate lots of pasta and cheese, we walked everywhere and I lost 5 lbs. I lost at least 5 lbs through no effort sophomore year, because I was so busy studying for organic chemistry I skipped many snacks. These occasions are rare in my life, but they do exist. Sometimes I'm convinced that having fun alone can cause you to lose weight, and I do carry too much stress in my everyday life (No, really. If I'm having fun I'm not stressing out, so there is no cortisol action going on in my body). When I have to go to workshops or meeting for work, it's so hard. Sometimes I learn things like "I really can wait until 1:00 to eat lunch if I try hard - why do I need to carry almonds everywhere with me?" Sometimes I wonder how everyone else in the room isn't ready to spring from their seats in hunger.

To summarize, I don't get it either, Saef, but you're not alone in your wonderings. Glad you enjoyed your trip! I lived in Los Alamos for a summer. I love the Mexican food and could not apply enough lotion. Yes, the altitude makes a bigger difference than one realizes, too.

Shannon, wow! You finished a half marathon! That is awesome! And I'm so proud of you for finishing, even though you were having so much trouble with your IT band. Sorry you are so stressed. I hope this week is calmer for you.

Michele, you can do it! Dancing carrot!

Quote:
Some days, it helps for me to look at something like this: http://www.elephantjournal.com/2013/...-foods-photos/
I knew there was a reason I used to mainline baby carrots as a teenager on weight watchers. Not I mainline adult carrots... I was not surprised by these, but I forget sometimes. Good reminder.

I ate well yesterday, wogged with the dog, and got a full night's sleep. Why do I always feel like I'm recovering from being beat up the day after I get that good night's sleep? Not that I've ever been beat up, so I don't know what that feels like. But you get the idea. It feels good to be on track.
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Old 02-19-2013, 02:14 PM   #295
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So yesterday I had pizza for lunch and didn't move enough, and I'm tired and hormonal and out of sorts, and trying to remember that just because last week wasn't what I expected that I sill exercised more than half the days in the week and finished a half marathon, so can't be all bad, right?
You're not inadequate. You're not lazy. You're not defective. You're not slacking.

You exercised more than half the days despite considerable challenges, and that may have helped you with your stress, and thus may have been part of taking care of yourself.

What you are, is tired and anxious, and injured, since you got hurt while running.

I understand that mentally, you wanted to finish your race, that there is honor in finishing your race, and in carrying out an intention that you'd set for yourself. But I also think that if you are really hurting, like, practically wounded in action during a race, it's okay to stop. I mean, to stop running instead of running on an injury. It reminds me of Thoroughbred horses who could've been saved if they'd stopped instead of keeping going on adrenalin and instinct. Sometimes stopping is what you need to take care of yourself.

This is where I lose it, personally. I mean, that I lose sight of the concept that exercise is meant to be a way to take care of myself. I turn it into something else entirely, a kind of lifeline, a magical ritual to keep off weight and ward off the state of being fat, a state that I equate with being inadequate, lazy, defective, and slacking. Which probably makes the exercise counterproductive.

Be well, Shannon, and take care of that ITB injury.

If someone has a surefire method for coping with stress that everyone can easily adopt, and that doesn't involve an addiction of some kind, can they please share it? We would all benefit.

(Probably the catch is "easily adopt." Lots of things that others have recommended, like yoga and meditation, seem to require lots of training & concentration, and consequently themselves become stressful, i.e., I need to read up on it, buy tapes, sign up for classes, set aside time for it, worry about my proficiency, etc., etc.)
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Old 02-19-2013, 02:21 PM   #296
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Then my half marathon on Sunday. I was less prepared than I could have been and wasn't expecting a PR, but wasn't expecting what happened. My IT band started to twinge at 4 miles, then really shut down after mile 7. I ended up walking most of the last half of the race. Took me just under 3 hours to finish, and I was pretty upset about it. But, as the very sweet woman who handed me a medal at the end said "at least you finished, and you look great". I'm trying to remember that and not beat myself up. The entire right side of my body hurt most of the day yesterday - I think when the IT band started to fail I tried to compensate, so I ended up with my right foot hurting, my right hip and even my right shoulder. I feel better today, but at one point on Sunday I could hardly walk. I wasn't at all prepared for that.
Oh Shannon! You know I totally feel you!!! I am still nursing my ITB problem and the treadmill seems to aggravate it SO BAD! Do you wear a ITB Strap? That has helped me SO MUCH!

Please tell me you are resting it this week?

jen
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Old 02-19-2013, 03:51 PM   #297
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Congratulations on the half, Shannon! And I'm so sorry about the injury. Please don't beat yourself up.

And, saef, I have truly missed your insight. Exercise as a magical talisman, rather than self-care. Yes, I can identify.

Jen (CherryPie) - Hi! I don't think we overlapped in posting much before I disappeared. It's nice to see another Jen, and another shorty.

I seem to be coasting a bit on the enthusiasm of the newly re-dedicated. I'm sure we all know what I mean. I know it won't last for long so I'll take it while I can.

A cousin is stopping through town tonight so we're meeting for dinner. I'm devious enough that I'll steer us to someplace where I can easily find something "safe." I'm not above that!
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Old 02-19-2013, 04:05 PM   #298
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Saef - I did stop running, mostly. I pushed it a little further than I should have but I did give in to the inevitable walking. I could have gotten a ride back with the ambulance that was pacing us, but I felt fine when I was walking and not running. In hindsight, I might should have stopped and ridden in, but at least I stopped the running. And I was thinking about horse racing and injuries as I walked it in, actually.

Jen/CP - I do have an ITB strap, I wasn't wearing it as I haven't had any trouble with mine since last May. I'll be wearing it from now on, though. I didn't think the treadmill would bother it, is't it worse on downhills? I'm resting from running this week I think, but is there anything else I can do other than yoga? Can I walk on the elliptical or ride the bike? I have an assortment of options in my garage.

JenM - the enthusiasm of the re-dedicated is a big motivator. Enjoy your dinner tonight. I've been pleased lately with both Chili's and Olive Garden if you need 'big box' type choices for a place to go, they both have great low cal options now. There also is a great Mexican place up the road here that has a seafood fajita that they prepare in little to no oil, with corn tortillas and if you can avoid the chips and salsa it is not too bad, Mexico Tipico. I know lots of other great places, as I'm sure that you do too, but none of them really fit into the 'safe' place. I walk right into places these days and ask them what they use in cooking, what kind of preservatives and oils, etc. It lets you know pretty quickly which places are worth coming back to, especially if they don't want to talk to you about it. LOL
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Old 02-19-2013, 05:25 PM   #299
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saef Easy stress relief. Sit down in a chair and concentrate on monitoring your breathing - count of 4 while breathing in and another count of 4 while breathing out. I tend to think "in" and "out" as I'm doing this to minimize the brain chatter. Do this for about 10 minutes every day at roughly the same time.

I do this in the late afternoon after work and before evening chores and it has, on occasion, relaxed me enough to put me to sleep for a bit.

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Old 02-19-2013, 08:15 PM   #300
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Jen/CP - I do have an ITB strap, I wasn't wearing it as I haven't had any trouble with mine since last May. I'll be wearing it from now on, though. I didn't think the treadmill would bother it, is't it worse on downhills? I'm resting from running this week I think, but is there anything else I can do other than yoga? Can I walk on the elliptical or ride the bike? I have an assortment of options in my garage.
Wow - what bad luck that it kicked in on the race! Do you think you were running faster due to the excitement? Running faster can aggravate it. Downhill is definitely worse, and I even run with an incline of 2 on the tready and it still bothers me.

From what I've read, elliptical is fine - so is walking. Biking can make it worst if you ride with your knees turned inwards - I have only ridden a recumbent and have no issues.

Jen
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