Eight days until vacation! Unfortunately I have not met my weight loss goal. I'm still about 9 pounds shy although I have a feeling that I'll have at least a one pound drop this week (keep your fingers crossed--tomorrow is weigh in day).
I've had those irritable days before--nothing to pinpoint what causes it, but I've been told that when it happens people have to walk on eggshells around me. I didn't like that, so I try my darnedest to keep an even keel and be as nice as possible (at least outwardly--sometimes I can't help how I feel inside).
My husband's mantra when things are going poorly is "I've seen this movie before and no one dies in the end." It's similar to my thoughts that in the end, everything works out so why stress about it now.
Still holding at a tad under goal. I am going to a potluck tonight, my first choice was to bring a fresh fruit plate or fresh fruit salad but I have nothing on hand and don't feel like going to the grocery store. I had a German Chocolate Cake Mix and the frosting in my pantry that I have wanted to get rid of. The cake is now in my oven baking. I hope it will all be gone or that I can convince people to take some home tonight.
Thank God it's Monday. Really? REALLY???? I am tangled in exasperation, regret, and disappointment, and that's fine ... out of these ashes will soon rise something much more productive and positive. Nothing bad happened; I'm just having a heck of a time getting some acceleration on the changes I want to make.
Still holding at a tad under goal. I am going to a potluck tonight, my first choice was to bring a fresh fruit plate or fresh fruit salad but I have nothing on hand and don't feel like going to the grocery store. I had a German Chocolate Cake Mix and the frosting in my pantry that I have wanted to get rid of. The cake is now in my oven baking. I hope it will all be gone or that I can convince people to take some home tonight.
How did your potluck go Bargoo? Those are always challenging!
Potluck. hmmmm. Best Fettucine I have ever eaten and I ate some of my cake, too. My scale told the truth, too. I am soooo sick of dieting that has been my main preoccupation for the last several years, I have been successful but have also regressed, it gets to be so tiring.
bargoo, I'm having the same thoughts. I am really beginning to wonder if the attention I'm putting on *all of this* is diverting me from more fulfilling pursuits. I know I'm much happier without the extra weight I had, and I know I have plenty more room to improve my fitness level ... but maybe I'd be better off just working on that, and to trust my knowledge of what to eat and how much for a while and see where that takes me. I'd really like to hurdle that 150# barrier. However, like you said, I'm a little tired of tilting at this windmill. Perhaps there's a back door I should try to find instead!
You know my story about ice cream and how it can live untouched for months at a time? Yeah, well, DH and I ate it last night. A big bowl each. Granted it is now gone so there is no temptation at all, and I won't be buying any more for a long time. But my scale sure hated me this morning.
I'd really, really like to see at least 145 on the scale before the summer is over at least. I see 149 quite regularly, but with vacation looming (and you know the cuisine on most cruise ships!) I don't know what I'll come home as. DD wants to work out while we're on vacation, but I wasn't planning on packing my shoes--they take up so much valuable space! Oh, what to do!!!
2 lb blip and I feel enormous and bloated and moody - hurry up, TOM!
I had a fantastic weekend with old friends in NYC. We attended the Mermaid Parade on Coney Island, went to a brass band extravaganza afterparty in some random loft in Gowanus, and I had a seriously awesome arugula salad in Chelsea that had grilled peaches and heirloom tomatoes in it.
My Greyhound home was an hour+ late and I was stuck listening to a miserable and verbally abusive dad shoot down everything his 20-something, heavily tattooed son said, berate him for being stupid, and yell at him for putting a bag down where the dad couldn't reach it. It was all I could do not to turn around and say "Would you please shut the f#%k up and stop advertising to the world that you are a terrible parent?"
You know my story about ice cream and how it can live untouched for months at a time? Yeah, well, DH and I ate it last night. A big bowl each. Granted it is now gone so there is no temptation at all, and I won't be buying any more for a long time. But my scale sure hated me this morning.
I'd really, really like to see at least 145 on the scale before the summer is over at least. I see 149 quite regularly, but with vacation looming (and you know the cuisine on most cruise ships!) I don't know what I'll come home as. DD wants to work out while we're on vacation, but I wasn't planning on packing my shoes--they take up so much valuable space! Oh, what to do!!!
Walk around the decks a few times a day , that should help.
allison, of course you're in the club! I don't think it's a new club - maybe just an offshoot of the usual one. More like another step in the evolution of figuring out how to keep this up for a whole lifetime? It does get tough to buckle down when you can see gains almost unavoidably on the horizon. Cruises can be challenging! I was really surprised to find that they are catering to the folks who don't want to gain 10# in a week. I enjoyed a lot of colorful, creative preps on seafood and vegetarian entrees that I'd never imagined! Very cool that DD wants to continue her good habits - I totally understand the need for packing space, but I don't think you'd have any regrets if you made that option available?
I had a good chuckle about the ice cream, as I confess to making up a quart of the most decadent, creamy, delightful cinnamon ice cream ever. About the only good news was that it was so rich, a little bowl was plenty. And it had a slight grit to it from the cinnamon; I'll have to try infusing the cream with the sticks instead next time.
krampus - your weekend sounds like loads of fun! Tasty, too - peaches and tomatoes? Sending you "blip begone!" thoughts.
I had a quiet, sensible weekend, with a nice summer dinner last night of steamed littleneck clams, along with roasted, seasoned broccoli and green beans with roasted garlic. And cherries for dessert.
My moods are all over the place. I'm elated but uneasy at the same time, since I just heard from several emails & phone calls that my apartment is very near to completion. I'm straining at the leash, but I can't head down there: I've got to spend a few days in Wellfleet, Mass. as a house guest of my good friends who like to drink their wine all day long, from shortly after breakfast till well into the night. I love the Outer Cape, but have achieved such a rigorously healthy lifestyle that it's a weird situation when I visit friends who live a lot more, shall we say, loosely.
Partly I am unhappy because I have a lot to puzzle out, which I won't be able to do while out of the area. Now comes the headache of finding someone to move the antique furniture that I've acquired since the flood downstate to its newly renovated home. There are also some stray pieces that I managed to carry up to a neighbor's apartment for refuge. The mover has to be someone trustworthy, preferably someone with experience with antique furniture -- like a dealer who travels to shows and knows how to pack and handle this stuff, & who maybe needs some extra money.
I'm in the 'tired of tilting at windmills' club right now too, I think. I'm tired of tracking every calorie, weighing all my food, logging every M&M... but when I don't I eat too much. I can't handle the intuitive eating, it doesn't work for me. How do I turn my focus so I'm not obsessed with food and diet, yet still live healthy? Can I do that without regressing to the person who didn't pay attention and losing control again?
Food is so important to us , isn't it ? It is not just for sustenance, it is a great stress reliever and comfort. I had a biopsy this morning, I'm thinking I deserve a lollipop, I was a good girl and went to the Doctor. On the way home I am thinking, ice cream, custard pie, peanut butter or all of the above. I am pleased to say I didn't give in but came home and had crab bisque instead, it was good but didn't give me that comfort feeling that I was sure I deserved.
bargoo - first things first, I hope your biopsy is normal. Crab bisque, IMHO, would be a top-tier comfort food! I wish there were an easy substitute for that comfort feeling. Most of the time, a good strenuous cry wipes out the causative stress for me. That's a whole 'nother piece of this big puzzle - absolutely you DO deserve comfort - to feel safe, loved, and at peace. That's a pretty high expectation to have for food though. Perhaps that is where the "spiritual bucket" comes in?
shannon, I don't have a good answer. I do know that I *learned* to be obsessed during this process - it's certainly not my nature with most things! I am not sure that the only two choices are to be fat, or to be obsessed, y'know? Is it intuitive, or is it a finely-honed habit? The only way I can think of to test it, is to try it.
krampus, if they do, then I don't want to ever be one of them. Apart from the completely actualized/enlightened, whose mental state has gone beyond the petty physical needs, it can't be a fun way to live. Even if that's all you had to do all day was worry about what you eat and how you look because that's how you make your living, think about the kind of stress the scale can invoke there! Yuck.
saef, you're in the home stretch of this long adventure. Once you get in YOUR PLACE, many things will be back in your control. Certainly there will still be lots of decisions, and work will still be work ... the urgency and intensity will recede. It'll be okay!
I am tangled in exasperation, regret, and disappointment, and that's fine ... out of these ashes will soon rise something much more productive and positive. Nothing bad happened; I'm just having a heck of a time getting some acceleration on the changes I want to make.
Sending you "blip begone!" thoughts. 
Crab bisque, IMHO, would be a top-tier comfort food! I wish there were an easy substitute for that comfort feeling. Most of the time, a good strenuous cry wipes out the causative stress for me. That's a whole 'nother piece of this big puzzle - absolutely you DO deserve comfort - to feel safe, loved, and at peace. That's a pretty high expectation to have for food though. Perhaps that is where the "spiritual bucket" comes in? 
