Dagmar - i know what you mean, my friends with kids always make comments like 'when you are a mom...' - make it like a elite club.
I could never decide whether i wanted kids or not. Now i wouldn't even attempt it - just too darn tired. Luckily most of my friends don't have kids so its not really a huge issue. Now cats - we have two kitties that don't get along - there is always fur flying around here
Just went for a 6k run - in the sun
It was actually a really good run and felt like a jaunt after that 20k extravaganza! I am going to get one more 20k under my belt before the 26th - then my body will really be ready for the distance.
I am so livid - someone tried to scam me during an online purchase. I was looking to buy a nice used road bike - did a little haggling over the price etc. and then got this bogus UPS invoice asking me to pay for the bike via Western Union...as if. I sent the seller a nasty email and had the ad pulled from the buysell. Even though they didn't get any money out of me - it still makes me annoyed that they tried.
When I was in high school and college, I vowed that I'd never have kids. My best friend gave me a Cabbage Patch doll one year for Christmas because she thought I ought to have at least one "baby." Then my brother and his wife had a baby. Then my husband's sister had a baby. Suddenly I felt that I wanted one too. Sadly, my friend who gave me the doll couldn't have kids of her own. She and her husband ended up adopting from Russia after a failed domestic adoption. The kids are good, but they've definitely had their problems--health and personality-wise. Both have had eye surgeries, one has had heart surgery, and both have had emotional problems, including destructive behavior (one hurts herself, the other damages school property). She's a saint for being able to handle it. (They're the ones visiting this weekend!)
Anyway, I've never regretted my decision, but I have plenty of friends who don't have kids and probably never will and I don't feel that they're any different than anyone else. It's their decision. I think, however, our community is a bit more relaxed in all that.
Sheila, how nice of the party hostess to host an anniversary party without knowing. That was cool!
Megan, your BF sounds very sweet to make sure you have a good vacation when his livelihood is been devoured by that crappy oil company. I’m glad you’re included in the equation if he sails away. Too funny about your parents’ dog. I hope their walks aren’t too far from home since they get to carry them when he’s done.
Jessica, laughing at the non-neutered boy dog having more behavioral issues. My Kody dog would drive me insane if he wasn’t neutered. He would have been a good stud for racing sled dogs but I’d never have been able to take it. My vet said she can neuter at 4 months. As a 4 month b-day present years ago, Kody was neutered. I wasn’t waiting a minute.
Allison, enjoy your weekend with your friend. Sounds like the two of you are very close. That article was disgusting on so many levels. Does this lady not want to be alive for her 2 kids???
Michele, LOL at your kitties’ names.
Ennay, I’m allergic to cats and some cause more problems than others with my nose. You might want to do a little research then present your findings to DH. Although I vote for the doggie.
Iris, your dad is nuts. Inside or out, I’d never want a boy doggie smelling a girl doggie in heat somewhere in the neighborhood. If not breeding to further the breed, pets should be fixed. So count me in for those in favor.
Shannon, I hope you sleep better tonight and feel better. My dogs’ word is walk. They hear it and they’re at the door howling.
Dagmar, I get why there’s division in child/childless at younger ages. But you and I are in the half century area and I can’t think of any setting that makes a difference anymore where I have kids. Where do you still find problems? And without a doubt, my dogs are simpler than my children – when they were kids and now as adults. But I do have more complete conversations with my children than the dogs. I have to carry on their part.
Ennay, kids move out but they are still your responsibility. Not in the same way, but it never goes away. I remember thinking when mine were teenagers, move out already. Doesn’t really change. The problems/concerns change, but they’re still your kids. Them moving out doesn’t change the desire to protect and care for them.
Sznn, when I was selling my sofa on craigslist, it was amazing the number of scams that people tried to pull. I swear the cheaters think the rest of us are stupid.
Bill, way cool point on the kids. Your kids are blessed to have you. Very blessed.
Wow, the thread was busy today. Took forever to catch up. I had a dr. appt for a lump DH found right below where my ribs meet. DH says zyphoid but I have no idea of anatomy. Any dr. said that it was benign and probably fibrous tissue. It’s really small. DH has been directed to monitor it for a while to see if it changes. So that was great news. And…. I’m now an AT&T customer. I’m in their system for DH’s line so when the iphone 4 comes out on the 25th, we just have to change from basic to family plan. Yippee. I cancelled t-mobile. The guy was nice but says, “What can’t you do with your iphone on our network that you can with AT&T.” First I had know idea they could tell I had a jailbreak iphone. That was weird. My answer was I wanted a legal iphone now that AT&T is in my area. I’ve really like t-mobile and the only reason I was changing was the iphone. I’m not 2 steps closer to my new toy. Sadly, I just put my beloved ipod touch on craigslist. I’m so attached to my toys. I have this idea that toys have feelings. But I must pay for the new toy and don’t need duplication. FYI for those that have iphones, the new OS4 will be available for all iphones. I didn’t know that so that is cool for DH who is inheriting mine.
Marie
Marie, the xyphoid process is a normal part of anatomy, but I had never felt mine until I lost weight. So maybe that's all the "new discovery" is. I hope so!
Marie, I'm glad that the lump seems to be benign! DH's dad had a large benign tumor near his ribcage (the size of a baseball) for many years. He didn't want to have it removed because he surgery is always risky, and it was benign and not causing problems, but apparently he got it removed a few years ago because DH's mom was annoyed by it!
Ennay, LOL, it's hearing things like that that make me hesitant to have kids! Also part of the reason DH and I got a dog first -- we figured if we couldn't handle the commitment of taking care of a dog for 10 years, we would never be able to handle having kids. Although I have to say, I would rather still be taking care of Carter 20 years from now than know that he is going to die in 4-6 years. Then again, he is toilet trained, doesn't talk back, and is always happy to see me.
Allison, that article was very sad. But then again so many people do so many bizarre and gross things for world records (like the hot dog eating championship?) that I'm not surprised.
Dagmar, that's too bad that people still give you grief over not having kids. But at least you have fur-kids! DH and I are already somewhat ostracized by our neighbors for not having kids. To be fair we picked this neighborhood largely *because* it was so family-friendly and we always planned to have kids, but we thought it would be friendlier to us before having kids too.
Gary, it is kind of unfair that men can have kids at any age, but women's fertility declines dramatically each year!
I figure that at some point some switch will flip and I will suddenly want kids immediately. I'm just hoping that point comes while I am still fertile!
Jessica, LOL on the time switch. I’m so surprised by the neighbors not being friendly because you haven’t had children. Until this area of the thread started, I had no idea. I’m still trying to grasp what difference it makes. I guess I’m just simple.
Ennay, You do have a point. When my kids were teenagers, a cage could have come in handy.
Jay, it’s below the xyphoid by an 1 ½”. I’m not worried because I do trust what the doctor said.
It is cold and rainy here today. Nothing new on that front. But every weather forecast says that summer will arrive this weekend. 80’s and sunny. YEAH!!!!
Marie
I never wanted to have kids, and still don't want to have one of my own. I 'acquired' DSS when I married DH and I love him dearly, but have no desire to have a baby. I get a lot of 'don't you want to have one of your own?' or 'doesn't your SS deserve a brother or sister?' comments, and yes, some of them are often judging. I have gotten a lot of flak in the past about not wanting kids, almost like I'm not fulfilling my role as woman in society by not having a baby. Personally, I think it is a valid choice. Like Jay, I think more women should speak up if they don't want kids - I felt pretty alone and ostracized over it in my younger days.
Marie - hope you get your sunshine!
Jessca - my aunt had two kids after 40, so even if the switch flips a little late it is much more doable now than in the past. Though, it takes longer to toilet train a baby than it did Carter I'm sure...
Ennay - I used to joke about how I could crate my beagle when I went to work, but would get arrested if I left my kid in a crate in front of the tv while I ran errands... Then my beagle started chewing out of the crate, so couldn't even leave her in one!
Allison - I have several friends who adopted babies from Russia who have had problems. I have so much respect for them taking on those issues - child rearing is hard enough without the extra drama.
Gary - you are a fantastic dad.
Susan - Annoying about the trouble with the bike order! I hate people who try those kinds of things - messes up the process for all of us. I had some things I wanted to sell on Craigslist recently and was worried about it. Luckily, I found people to take my items without having to post them.
I got more sleep last night, so feel somewhat better. I didn't work out last night and didn't do my yoga this morning - figured 24 hours without exercise couldn't hurt. Planning a run tonight, either treadmill or park depending on the weather.
I hate some of DSS's personal cheese pizza from pizza hut last night. Stupid stupid stupid after the soup I had for lunch, so now my rings are tight again. Ick. This is my first summer after getting my wedding band resized, so I'm not used to it fitting so snug. Last summer it was still falling off of me even at the hottest and bloated-est times...
Hmmm, my mother wanted grandchildren, but fortunately my sister obliged her! I didn't not want kids when I was younger, but the older I got, the less I wanted them, and my life has been fine. I had enough friends more than willing for me to take their toddlers off their hands for a few hours, and of course, both my sister and DH's brother were more than willing for us to take their kids anytime! DH has always not wanted kids. He felt his parents were not good at parenting and that he had no role models. We have always had animals though.
A cool cloudy day here. "they" keep saying we'll have showers but none have appeared. We sure could use them. We had a momma moose and a young calf wandering around our yard this morning. All our deck furniture is out on the lawn because DH is going to power wash the deck, and of course they were wandering around looking like they were choosing their seats.
Marie, it's not that our neighbors are *un*friendly. They're friendly enough in general, but they don't want to be our friends, if that makes sense. Like, they came and introduced themselves to us when we moved in, the first question we got was "do you have kids?" and we never talked to them again except to wave when we pass each other in the street. I had hoped that some of our neighbors would be come our friends as well, but since we have no kids they're not interested. In retrospect it would have been better to move into a community of more young couples and then move to where we are now after having a kid, but we hate moving and never want to move again!
Shannon, that is pretty crappy that people try to pressure you into having a kid so DSS has a sibling. Do they pressure his mom into providing a sibling for him? I think not! LOL about toilet training Carter. He was 4 when we adopted him so he came pre-trained! We didn't have to do a thing, and he never has accidents in the house. Ah, the benefits of adopting an older dog... Now I want to go home and give him a hug. My fur-baby!
Pat, that is so funny about the moose. I saw yet another bunny in our yard this morning. I let Carter out to chase it, but he totally didn't even see where it was and was running in circles because he heard me say "get the bunny!" but couldn't find it! By the time he figured it out it was through our fence and into the neighbor's yard. The bunnies have really been wreaking havoc on our plants -- most recently one of them chewed off a big stalk of our blueberry bush that had about 50 unripe blueberries on it. Then they didn't even eat it! They just chewed it off and left it sitting there.
My company is moving to a new building this weekend so this week at work has been extremely slow. We are in a project lull in any case (waiting on documents that need to be approved) but since we're moving I can tell that everyone is ready to be out of here. They're letting us out early tomorrow and we're not supposed to come in until noon on Monday. I'm curious about the new office but a little nervous -- there is much less privacy in the cubicle, so I may not be able to be on 3FC as much!
I just had to notarize the final paperwork for the legal settlement with my employee issue of last month and now I want ice cream... I'm glad it is over, now that the stress is dying down the sad is kicking in. I just don't understand why people do the things that they do...
Jessica~my neighbors, in all the neighborhoods we've lived in, have all been rather stand-offish. In Salt Lake, we were on a "wave" basis with the three immediate neighbors (either side and across the street) and I don't know that we ever knew their names. In Palm Springs, we eventually got to know a couple neighbors, but after 11 years I still didn't know many of them at all. Now in Palm Desert, we are friendly with several neighbors but not really friends with any of them, but we'll stop and talk if we're out. We don't do things with them. I think if we (DH and I) were more outgoing and "schmoosy" we'd probably have more friends, but we're kind of homebodies and we don't have the extra energy it takes to make a lot of friends.
Also part of the reason DH and I got a dog first -- we figured if we couldn't handle the commitment of taking care of a dog for 10 years, we would never be able to handle having kids. Although I have to say, I would rather still be taking care of Carter 20 years from now than know that he is going to die in 4-6 years. 
