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Today I sat & watched my DH eat french fries..wow,testing,testing..

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Old 06-30-2006, 12:37 AM   #1
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Default Today I sat & watched my DH eat french fries..wow,testing,testing..

This was difficult...as was last night,my second juice night,and my first juice night..Today we were out,and I needed to have some food..we ended up at Wendy's,but I had my diet plan with me,and ordered a diet coke,a side salad with ff dressing,and a sm.cup of chili..hold the cheese of course. I was good,didn't even open the crackers. DH ordered a cheezburger (my biggest trigger,and one of my most fav.foods)and instead of ordering the baked potato,or salad as I suggested,ordered the fries. We sat inches away from each other..and I am PROUD of myself,and happy that I was in control enough that I didn't even ask/take one bite. I ate my lettuce. Last night I was drinking my water w/ lemon,and he pulls up with a big bowl of real ice cream..and my first night of the juice,he did the same. What in the heck is this all about?..some kind of test?..I think he's teasing me..and if that is the case,that's mean in my view. I don't mean to diss my dh in public..but this is the safest place I know that I can let this all fall out. After lunch we went to the store because I needed more fruit,and am looking for that lo-fat salad dressing that you spray on..don't know the name tho..and while I was shopping,I toldhim it would be a good idea for him to get some potatoes so that when I'm not cooking his kindof food..meat potatoes gravy,etc. he can grab a potato,and nuke it...so he says..yea,yea,we've been through this before (diet for me). So it kind of sounds like his expectations for me to fail are right out there in front of my face. Wow! how sad,and rude..really..so I'm in a nonsupportive enviorment...gosh,this could make my goals more difficult. But something also happened when we had lunch,I dug my heels in..and said to myself..there is no way I'm going to crumble to this tease. And I didn't. I may need to plow through this alone in real life..but as the chief cook..I can say now that I am only going to cook what I can eat. I will only shop,buy those things that I can eat. If I need to make my own parade then I will..and I will need to up my prayers for strength,and hope you'll all still be here when the going gets tough. thanks for listening. I did good today,and I'm anxious for tomorrow..the longer I go,the stronger I will be..take care little darlin's..we will make this happen for our self. Tootles..Focus p.s.I did my walking too...
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Old 06-30-2006, 12:58 AM   #2
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ROCK ON FOCUS! Show him you mean business. Nothing modivates me more than someone telling me I'm not capable!!!!! Show him what you are made of!
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Old 06-30-2006, 01:28 AM   #3
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Focus- Yay to you for staying strong. I'm so sorry that your DH isn't being the support you need right now. Does he really want you to fail???? My DH said "If you are going to spend all that money then you better stick to it!" I plan my meals out once a week and use that for shopping. No, DH does not go shopping with me or the cart would be loaded with junk. I don't buy any junk and if he wants to he can buy it, but it cannot cross through the front door. He can keep it out in the camper or in his truck. I cook for me and if he doesn't want to eat what I am eating then he cooks his own meals. We don't have any children so I don't have to worry about that. If he is seriously trying to set you up to fail, I would have a sit down with him and tell him how important this is to you. maybe mention the side benefits of you losing weight that most men want to hear, if ya know what I'm talking about. If that doesn't work, then maybe he needs one of these You will always have us to come to for support and it's ok if you diss the DH once in a while, we all do it. Good luck to you girl!!!
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Old 06-30-2006, 01:33 AM   #4
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Good for you Focus! Of course we will be here. That is what is great about this place. The good and the bad, we can share and relate with all of it. So sorry that DH is acting this way. Many of us have had similar experiences. Just know that I, along with the other ladies, believe in you too. You CAN do this, regardless of what other people think. I think that all of this self betterment tends to make our DH's a little insecure. When you are working so hard at bettering yourself he may start feeling like he had better work on himself, too, which magnifies his own shortcomings. It should get better over time. Meanwhile, we are here for you!
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Old 06-30-2006, 09:59 AM   #5
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Default Much appreciation,and thanks for your understanding~

Thanks ladies, YOU ALL are exactly what I need: ,and will continue to need. I thank God that I've found you. Today I begin again,and weigh in number 3..I really feel I'm on the right path with this site,these threads,my new la buds (you all) ,and this lawl plan..it's reasonable,and doable,but then let me see what I weigh in for today>grin< ..laters,hugs~FOCUS(p.s. i noticed that we all started about the same weight/lbs.,so good to feel I'm not alone.
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Old 06-30-2006, 10:37 AM   #6
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I was lucky enough to have DH on plan with me so that made it tons easier and when he does cheat (and he does) he does it at work so I can't see. Anyway--I think once he sees how happy this is making you--b/c I for one AM a happier person all around--he will understand how important this is to you and maybe not "just another try" (because I've had too many "trys" to count". Until then--you have US--what could be better??
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Old 06-30-2006, 10:46 AM   #7
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Congrats on your will power. My DH was very nervous the first time I really lost weight. He thought it would somehow change who I was. After that success and he saw how happy I was he is very supportive now. I have the LAWL cookbook and my husband loves the recipes. In the beginning when I would cook something that was healthy I wouldn't tell him and once he said how good it was I would tell him. Since things were so good he never worries when I tell him that it is from a WW cookbook or the LAWL cookbook.

Keep up your strength, he will come around!!
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Old 06-30-2006, 11:20 AM   #8
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Focus,

My suggestion comes from ever-wise Katie...she put DH on LAWL without his knowledge or consent! Make only OP foods and serve them up to your DH like, here it is, this is what WE'RE eating. He may still eat the junk when he's not with you, but it might help to make him more supportive of what you're trying to do. Seriously, Katie, still laugh when I think about the secret diet you put your DH on!
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Old 06-30-2006, 11:43 AM   #9
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Focus - When I started three months ago, I was afraid that this would be another (and one of the most expensive) things I'd "Tried". However, the support I've received both here and at my COD has made this a lifestyle change. I agree with Lea Ann - I am definitely happier.

Hang in there, and when you feel tempted to stray, log on here for some support.
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Old 06-30-2006, 09:33 PM   #10
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Cool 1More lb.of unwanted unneeded unhealthy fat gone in

Hi winners! Well it didn't (IT-MONSTER) move all that much today..then I had to stop and really think...Hello???? talking to self..You have lost a totoal of 6.5 pounds, since Tuesday..that's 4days! So I deff.do not have any complaining to do..However,the councilor said it was because I wasn't eating the 2 bars per day as per my diet plan. I did try one yesterday,and to be honest I don't like them..and the cost! Geez,it's twice what the whole diet plan cost me..I don't want to plunk that kind of $$ down for bars that I don't like..and plus that, I want to re-learn how to eat properly, not stuff a bar in there to substitute real food...know what I mean?..I like to carry a apple,or a bar in my purse just for those times when I'm truly hungry,and don't want to eat junk..but to have to eat 2per day, don't think so. Now, as I understood today, IF,I didn't eat the bars..then I would not have my diet gaurenteed..But,I would still be eligible for the refund if (and not if's about it in my mind) I get to my goal. So,I don't need the bars to get the $$ back,as long as I reach goal. Right? Right! Now, why would I put stuff in my mouth that I dont like that's 200calories..when i'm not eating what I do like..I just don't get that part..In answer is the bars have protein..well, I did check out the Parie (msp)and they are very similar..less sugar too.. a little bit less protein tho..which as I'm learning is key. I paid my $600something, I will not go further with all the bells,and wissssels's..if I do not need them. SOMEONE TELL ME, DO I REALLY REALLY NEED THEM TO LOSE THE WEIGHT? I have asked this before when I was considering the plan,and got various answers, but now that I'm committed, I need to hear it again. PLEASE. Thank you sweet people...And how is your day going? Are you still in the game? Do you want to look in the mirror next week and see that that big ol' belly is looking smaller?...hey,that's me talking outloud..hugs.FOCUS~
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Old 06-30-2006, 09:35 PM   #11
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P.S. STEVI-ROCKS...your baby boy is just darling..love those baby's..I raised 3 sons,which was what I had always hoped for,and loved it every step of the way..(well almost every step)Focus~
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Old 07-01-2006, 10:03 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by focused&strong
Hi winners! Well it didn't (IT-MONSTER) move all that much today..then I had to stop and really think...Hello???? talking to self..You have lost a totoal of 6.5 pounds, since Tuesday..that's 4days! So I deff.do not have any complaining to do..However,the councilor said it was because I wasn't eating the 2 bars per day as per my diet plan. I did try one yesterday,and to be honest I don't like them..and the cost! Geez,it's twice what the whole diet plan cost me..I don't want to plunk that kind of $$ down for bars that I don't like..and plus that, I want to re-learn how to eat properly, not stuff a bar in there to substitute real food...know what I mean?..I like to carry a apple,or a bar in my purse just for those times when I'm truly hungry,and don't want to eat junk..but to have to eat 2per day, don't think so. Now, as I understood today, IF,I didn't eat the bars..then I would not have my diet gaurenteed..But,I would still be eligible for the refund if (and not if's about it in my mind) I get to my goal. So,I don't need the bars to get the $$ back,as long as I reach goal. Right? Right! Now, why would I put stuff in my mouth that I dont like that's 200calories..when i'm not eating what I do like..I just don't get that part..In answer is the bars have protein..well, I did check out the Parie (msp)and they are very similar..less sugar too.. a little bit less protein tho..which as I'm learning is key. I paid my $600something, I will not go further with all the bells,and wissssels's..if I do not need them. SOMEONE TELL ME, DO I REALLY REALLY NEED THEM TO LOSE THE WEIGHT? I have asked this before when I was considering the plan,and got various answers, but now that I'm committed, I need to hear it again. PLEASE. Thank you sweet people...And how is your day going? Are you still in the game? Do you want to look in the mirror next week and see that that big ol' belly is looking smaller?...hey,that's me talking outloud..hugs.FOCUS~


I don't think the bars are necessary. The big selling points are that they satisfy your sweet cravings and give you some protein. If you don't do the bars, you can replace them with food exchanges. But I can't recall what you replace them with in terms of food exchanges. It was posted on old threads so go back and look.

Also, many have said that they use Luna or Kashi bars with similar protein and caloric values. They are expensive too, like 1.50 a bar, but at least you can buy what you want rather than get stuck with a box of something you don't want.

(by the way, DH snuck a La peanut butter bar last night as his late night snack. He claims it was because he didn't feel like making his usual PBJ sandwich!!!)

Anyway, you will find that the counselors will try to sell you a lot of products, pills, snacks, shakes and bars. It is how they probably earn their commissions. The bars are very sweet and some think they are destructive because of the sweetness. I bought some of the snacks to try out. My opinion:

the pasta twists/cheese curls- taste okay, but leave you with that "i just ate styrofoam" sort of feeling=== will not buy again.

the la delites- sold as "just like muffin tops"- found them to be very very chewy and dense- like a molasses cookie - I actually liked them - but I also like breakfast bars like nutragrain- would buy if can't find a similar product in grocery store

the la shakes- in my opinion- grainy and gross unless you whip high speed and add fresh fruit or nf yogurt- why bother in my opinion.

the soups- salty and unsatisfying- waste of time for me

As far as the pills- there are many who buy equivalents out there. I have tried the excel, the reduce and bought a bottle of carb enders. I am trying this week without the excel, reduce and if I don't gain I will not buy them again. In regard to carb enders- I bought because I do like my carbs, however I do get some digestive issues when I take it.

by the way regarding you first post- many loved ones sometimes sabotage (intentionally or not) your attempts to get healthier. I think sometimes this is because they are threatened by the possibility that you may succeed. Stay "focused" and do it for yourself.

Some things that I have helped me with my family- If you do the shopping, buy what you need and if someone else wants the goodies then let he/she go buy them on their own. If you find it hard to be around someone eating cheeseburger and fries, or pizza and beer, then if you can, remove yourself from that situation. I have eaten in another room or at a different time on occasion when DH and DS are eating an Off plan meal. Eventually, you will start feeling stronger and realize that a loss of weight is much much better then a fifteen minute splurge.

I find the hardest thing is at work. I work in a small office. Most of the women are fit or relatively fit. A coworker of mine has lost about seven pounds and started working out and wearing sexier clothes and everyone raves. It is hard because I have lost twice that amount and no one has said a word! It bothered me a lot at first, but now I try to remind myself that I am not doing it for someone else to notice but for me.

Hang in there!
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Old 07-01-2006, 12:28 PM   #13
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I have not done the bars, and I have lost fine without them.
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Old 07-01-2006, 02:19 PM   #14
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Focused: I tried the Luna and Pria bars, but because I am not totally fond of their texture, I try to only eat one a day. I just add a 1/2 protein in for the other!
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Old 07-01-2006, 06:08 PM   #15
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Thank you all..fabulous information ,I think I'll eat the free box,and add some healthy protiein in some other fashion, what about a hard boiled egg,or a oz.of cheese along with my apple?. I did get a call from lawl this morning to see how I was doing which I think is really nice,but did hear more about the bars being crucial to success. One bar I ate yesterday had 16gr.of sugar in it! . Sugar is not my downfall,& I'm not a snacker so this kind of seems to me to be starting new behaviors that I don't think are all that healthy in the long run. Your suggestion/ advice when you have someone who seems to be sabotaging ..is right on..but it seems to be a overload this first week. Last night after DH came home from the store to get a loaf of bread, he also bought a punkin pie! Geez,that was just the last straw for me, I did a little loud talking,(not screaming) loud and to the point. I told him he better not plan on sitting in front of me every night eating ice cream and pie. When I wanted not-good-for-me-stuff out of my sight I'd put it in the garage,but can't do that w/ice cream/pie. Yes, i can get up and leave when it's possible & that's a good idea,just remove myself from the temptation. funny (not haha)thing though,Because of all of this happening, I'm becoming more resolute.. more 'no-way' am I going to break,and cave in. For once maybe stubborness is working toward my goal,and not against it.
Blessings everyone,and have a safe,healthy holiday.
I am so glad I have nobody close making homemade potato salad ..that would probably tip my resolve over the top. Take care buds..Focus
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