Beck Diet For Life/Solution – November 2009 – Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach

[Shepherdess]

Eating was on-plan yesterday. I’m enjoying still enjoying Thanksgiving leftovers. I did take a doggy bag home, but I threw out the food I didn’t want around the house. Now I only have food that I’m working into my plan. I did weights yesterday. It’s good that I’m getting stronger because DH and I have just begun feeding the sheep every day which requires me to lift heavy bags of feed. Last year I could just lift until I got tired and let DH finish, but he needs me to do more heavy lifting right now. It’s exciting to be able to do it.

Bennyhannamamma, kudos for returning to the Beck book. I have only used the Diet for Life book, but have wondered about the two different formats. I imagine that some find the one-day-at-a-time format works better and some find the stage format works better. Good for you for not giving up when the first didn’t work for you.

Nuxmaga, great job at thanksgiving. Sorry about the busy craft show, but kudos for recognizing the sabotaging thoughts. Here’s to a better second day—you can look at it like a do-over.

Ceejay, kudos on getting back on track after a difficult day. I liked the attitude “to heck with today. It is finished.” It’s a good way of putting it behind you and moving on. Sounds like you have a good plan and good luck with eating slowly and mindfully. It’s always a challenge.

Gardenerjoy, kudos on a successful thanksgiving and a scale reading that reflects it. It sounds like you have a good strategy for your stuffing. Kudos for making your own that you like better and finding a way to enjoy it.

BillBE, yay for buying new clothes because they are worn not because you’ve outgrown them. That’s a sign of success. Kudos for making time for the gym and for shopping on Black Friday. DH and I drove by the mall on our way to the office yesterday and I thought if I went into that parking lot, I’d never get out again.

[maryblu]

Quick 'lo from your fellow Beckie. Shepherdess, such a great feeling, doing work you couldn't do last year..great joy, good job. *that's what this journey is about..better living!

That said, last night's dancing will be followed by tonight's dancing..sorry to have to report to my coaches I have a lotta indulging to undo..I can feel it..everywhere..and *see it..right where those fat cells always so obligingly and gleefully swell up whenever I let the indulgence go on too long ...Oh, well, only sat out 4 songs last night, and tonight's another night!

[Nuxmaga]

Hi All,
Another craft show down! Yay! Today was exceedingly slow, and I ate pretty much calorie for calorie as I did yesterday, sigh. I did track my food, credit. I walked for coffee and for lunch, credit. Declined a cookie from a friend, credit, who then gave it to dh, who then offered to me, and I declined again, credit. Main sabotaging thought to watch is "oh, it's a big package, but I'll eat only one serving." That didn't work with the 16 oz of chocolate milk, nor did it work with the large bag of potato chips. In fact, I doubt it has ever worked, but it sounds so seductive. . .
Planning for personals tomorrow. A quick one now for Bill--you made me laugh with the YouTube videos of my sil and her Beckian eating! I did have a fleeting moment of thinking that would be cool, followed by the thought of how crazy she'd think I was!

[bennyhannahmama]

Continuing to read the book. Purchased/located all the "tools" I need. Going to bed now. More tomorrow.

[BillBlueEyes]

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Wonderful day out and about, mostly on Atlantic Ocean beaches reveling at the winter ducks. Terrific sighting of a few Northern Gannet diving at great speed for fish in the water. Some harbor seals were broaching like porpoises - so funny. CREDIT moi just for joy. A strong wind made it feel like winter even though the temperature was up at 50 degrees Fahrenheit.

Lunch tastes so good when huddled in the car to get warm, in a beautiful spot on planet earth, experiencing a tad of real hunger. It felt like my peanut butter, walnuts, and banana sandwich was manna from heaven. I noted that I didn't munch on anything during the drive home; CREDIT moi.


maryblu - Yay for dancing, dancing, and dancing. Can't be any better exercise than having that much fun.

Kim (bennyhannamama) - Waving back. Satisfying to have the "tools" in place.

Margaret (Nuxmaga) - Ouch for slow sales; Double Ouch for the nibbling from stress and boredom. But Double Kudos for declining the same cookie twice, LOL. That's a point about economics that I've never grasped; each time that cookie passes from one person to the next the Gross National Product of the country increases by one more cookie - regardless of how many people the same single cookies passes through. Perhaps some day an overweight economist will read Beck, find their way here, and explain that to me.

Shepherdess - Congrats for being able to lift those heavy bags of feed and for doing it for the whole job. Men's Health magazine recently touted working out with feed bags rather than weights because it works all the small muscles as well as the major ones - says that the trainers for major league football teams stress that.

Readers -

day 10
Set a Realistic Goal

It is natural to want to set a long term goal. In reality, though, we don't yet know whether your goal is reasonable for you. I also don't want you to become anxious thinking how far you have to go. Instead, I'd like you to set a short-term goal to lose 5 pounds.

You probably want to lose more than that, of course. So once you lose 5 pounds, set a new goal to lose 5 more pounds, and so on. Each time you lose 5 pounds, celebrate. Call a friend or your diet coach, and celebrate together. Or buy yourself something you can afford that you've wanted for a while.

The Beck Diet Solution, pg 113.

[Shepherdess]

I had a nice long run yesterday. It was moving a little slow, but I just let myself enjoy being outside and putting in my miles. I was tempted to take seconds at dinner, even though my first helping had been plenty. I resisted and stayed on track. I’m telling myself that my reward for my hard exercise is to stay on plan so that it counts for something.

Maryblu, yay for two nights of dancing—great way to get your exercise. It’s somehow comforting to hear that even veterans indulge a little too much, and it’s encouraging to hear that you recognize it and undo the damage before the situation gets out of control.

Nuxmaga, kudos on getting your exercise and for turning down the same cookie twice. Nice recognition of the sabotaging thought that you’ll eat only one serving out of a several-serving package.

Bennyhannamamma, good job keeping up and getting prepared.

BillBE, those of us from landlocked states are loving your description of a walk on the beach. The idea of harbor seals as wildlife is pretty amazing. LOL at working out with feed bags. Maybe we could open a gym on the side and get people to pay to do our work for us. But it is a great workout.

[maryblu]

BillBE, you must be serious about the same cookie being counted twice, or as many times as it passes as adding to GNP..and btw, when did it cease being called GDP? That is insane but I shouldn't be surprised; of all the disciplines, I swear economics is the biggest buncha bs I ever did see. Nothing else even comes close. Where else do you go in to defend your dissertation with a dart board?

Yes, to Shepherdess and all, I did fall back....am pist at myself, but seriously back on track..how to do that? Write it down. I know BillBE and so many of the maintainers would stress planning..write it down first...but for me, just keeping track and writing it down gets me back on track. I do trust my body to tell me it has had just enough. My mind set is there, so I am not worried, just pist. What did I learn?

It wasn't that much fun. It really wasn't. Which tells me I was feeding emotions..duh...the hard part for me is always sorting out what emotion(s)..it is never that easy to do..

Am thinking there was a bit of arrogance, cockiness mebbe, too. Well, I am sufficiently humbled. The truth is, I can indulge once in a while and get away with it..it just gets dangerous if I let it go..that is I know why Bill keeps such watch, as do the maintainers..they document and record one slip..and watch like hawks for repeats of such lax behavior.

Dancing last night was great..the band was great, my dance partner better! *SMILE

[AnneWonders]

Coaches/Buddies I had an exceptionally crappy run this morning, so I'm in a bad mood. It may have kicked my butt out of some recent complacency so hopefully it'll help. 100% on plan today, except for a planned chocolate milk I skipped since I didn't make the miles it was supposed to refuel. I also measured out 3/4 of my peanut butter allotment for my sandwich and didn't miss it. I quit eating an apple in the middle because I was done. Credits all around.

AnnZ Hooray for the Turkey Trot. We did one too. It is becoming one of our family Thanksgiving traditions. A good one too. Except I almost got quacked off the course by a pond full of irate ducks that seemed ticked to have their lovely morning disturbed by rampaging hordes who didn't bother to bring breadcrumbs.

BillBE I like the idea of pomegranates on Thanksgiving. They always seem so festive to me. Replacing worn pants sounds like a huge victory to me. MAKE A MEMORY CARD ABOUT THIS! There now. Glad your ducks were less scary than mine.

Shepherdess Sounds like you had a wonderful holiday. Love the sunrise description. Reminds me of the wonderful one that we had yesterday. Glad you are able to help feed the sheep! I'm jealous of a nice long run.

Kim Good work on re-engaging with CBDFL. I find it does help when I'm being consistent. I need to get my calendar to start pinging me to read my Cards again. I do better when I do that.

Nuxmaga Good for Thanksgiving, and rats for the craft show. Hope you can at least chalk it up to a learning experience. On that note, I should be a genius by now!

CeeJay Good for you for getting back on track and getting the planning rolling again.

gardenerjoy I take scale smugness every time I can get it. Good for you.

maryblu Dancing sounds wonderful. Indulging is so seductive, especially when you get away with it. It eventually catches up. Always. Sigh.

Ah, the Boy is crying. Must go mother him in some way.

Anne

[gardenerjoy]

I won NaNoWriMo today -- 50,000 words and a complete story. It's bad, but it's an order of magnitude better than last year's story, so if I keep improving at that rate, I may one day write a novel that I would actually let someone else read.

It's obvious that I'm not going to meet my exercise goal for November. That's related to the above. Some of my exercise time and energy went into writing. I've already made some notes about how I could do things a bit differently next year so that I could meet both goals.

It helped to fall off the exercise a bit, in an odd way. I miss it! I'm having more aches and pains and more trouble sleeping with less exercise so I'm very motivated to get back on track.

WI: -0.3kg, Exercise: +25, 1064/1300 minutes for November, Food: op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

BillBlueEyes: sounds like a wonderful day of bird watching!

Shepherdess: love your self talk to resist seconds after exercise

maryblu: glad the dancing was great and that you're working through the slip

wndranne: yay for stopping eating when you're done -- that one's really hard for me.

[bennyhannahmama]

Coaches/Buddies:
Just created a new Advantages Deck and have my first 4 Response Cards ready to go.

In looking over the Success Skills for Stage 1 I'm completely overwhelmed. I'm kind of confused (may just be because I'm really tired). I know the original book focused on one skill per day (which was too fast for me), and that this new book has more of an emphasis on taking the time you need to really master the skills before moving on. However, it looks like I'm supposed to try learning all 10 Skills at once. That's where the overwhelmed feeling comes in.

So, for tomorrow, I've decided that I will incorporate these skills:

- reading my Advantages Deck
- reading my Response Cards
- weigh myself
- check in with buddies/coaches

How have other people handled this? I want to set myself up for success and feel if I attempt to incorporate all 10 skills at once it's not going to be pretty

Any advice appreciated!

Oh and by the way, thanks for all the feedback from everyone. I hope to get to personals soon, but see above re: feeling overwhelmed

Goodnight!

[BillBlueEyes]

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Had planned to have a piece of coffee cake with a bunch of folks; I did - CREDIT moi. But then a late arriving Boston Cream Pie appeared - my favorite cake - and, with a belly full of coffee cake, I just had a piece. Oh Well. Gotta remember that even a planned serving of sugar stuff triggers my neurons to want more.

Exercise included walking miles from one end of Home Depot to the other to get some stuff for my heating system, including timer thermostats so that we don't have to do all that work of turning the thermostat down each night and up each morning. Found one of those only-the-month-before-Christmas bargains of 60 AA alkaline batteries for $9.99. Even though we use rechargeables whenever possible, we still consume enough throwaways to justify those.


maryblu - Congrats to you and that man in your life of-a-certain-age for over the top performances this weekend; 392 yards passing is as good as you dancing the band under the table, LOL.

Kudos for going through the work to identify which emotions you were trying to satisfy with food; Yep, shining a little light on that is a great defense, and, as the good Dr. Beck says, "The best offense is a good defense."


Anne (wndranne) - LMAO at your "pond full of irate ducks." We were approached by a guy who was fascinated by our spotting scope who told us that if we had a loaf of bread, all the ducks would come over and we wouldn't need it ... <sigh>. Kudos for fine tuning your eating; I'm particularly impressed with stopping mid-apple - that's above my skill level.

Kim (bennyhannamama) - Whatever it takes to counter the "overwhelmed feeling" is certainly priority one. Kudos for seeing that and making choices. I can't think of any better advice than what you've done - attack the list one by one to gather the skills while feeling in control.

Joy (gardenerjoy) - Big Congrats on completing your NaNoWriMo novel two days early. Perhaps you could cut yourself some slack in criticizing it - perhaps in a month it could seem worthy of having another reader. Kudos for already working on your strategies for next year for keeping up with exercise even under the stress of churning out a 50,000 word novel in a month.

Shepherdess - Now that's one stellar line of thinking, "my reward for my hard exercise is to stay on plan so that it counts for something." Beck needs to get that into her book to help people fight the tendency to chomp a 500 calorie reward for 200 calories of exercise.

Yep, opening the Shepherdess Dude Ranch would be a nifty second income; you could also allow the guests the exercise of shoveling manure and the dexterity training of removing stuff from your wool, LOL.


Readers -

day 10
Set a Realistic Goal

One woman I counseled bought an inexpensive charm for her charm bracelet every time she reached a new 5-pound goal. Consider indulging yourself in some non-food-related way - with a tennis lesson or a massage, for example. It's important to celebrate your small successes along the way rather than waiting until you've lost a lot of weight to feel good about your efforts.

The Beck Diet Solution, pg 113.

[RobinW]

Good Morning

Still doing good here...100% on plan. Ive been making it to the gym at 3x a week, and Ive worked my way up to 3 miles on the treadmill. Im down several lbs, and Im feeling better for it. More mentally than anything else.

Work is keeping me very busy, and trying to make time with my husband has become even more important. We work together all day every day....home and together, every day all day......so breaking us apart from the "business" hasnt been easy. We have been focusing on just "us" again....and this has helped the stress level alot too.

Ive found some meditation podcasts and Ive been working on my breathing.....its all helping

Have a wonderful day everyone!!

[Shepherdess]

Last night I found myself snacking mindlessly on some gummy peach candies I had bought earlier in the day. I’m still trying to sort out how it all happened, but I think everything started with skipping my mid-morning snack. DH and I were doing errands and I didn’t pack my snack. Maybe it was arrogance or just plain old stupidity. So I went to the store hungry and picked up the candies—one of our favorites. I told myself I would work them into my plan, or DH would eat them, or whatever, they just needed to be in my basket. So before dinner, they were sitting on the counter and I just started munching away and didn’t bother to stop once I started. Then I wasn’t really hungry for dinner. I ate some veggies but that was it. I’m not sure if I was just feeling justified since I deprived myself earlier or what. So the lessons are 1) eat all planned snacks and 2) don’t bring treats into the house unless I already have a plan for them.

I did do my weights yesterday, so that is one success.

Maryblu, all of your dancing sounds like a blast. Kudos for getting back on track. I’m impressed by your intuitive approach. I’ve been thinking I should try to focus more on how my body feels and less on the objective number crunching because I would eventually like to be able to eat like a normal person. I just don’t trust myself yet—one step at a time, I guess.

Wndranne, sorry for the crappy run, but glad that it’s serving as motivation. I’m impressed that you quit eating an apple in the middle because you were done. I always feel like I need to eat everything I plan, even if I have to stuff it down. Just need to pay more attention to my body.

Gardenerjoy, huge congrats on your writing and yay for missing exercise. You may not have met your exercise goals, but you did log quite a few minutes even during a rough time. It think there’s a victory there.

Bennyhannamamma, kudos on getting your advantages and response cards made. I followed the same program, but I didn’t do everything all at once. For the most part I just added skills one by one working them into my schedule when I could. Usually it was one a day. I added several skills at a time if they were easy or waited a few days if a skill was particularly hard. And with the different experiments, I just did them when it worked with my schedule (particularly the hunger versus non-hunger experiment and the hunger experiment. They took more planning).

BillBE, interesting insight that a bit of sugar triggers desire for more sugar. It’s certainly true for me. It’s just a good reminder to be extra vigilant after my planned indulgences. Kudos on killing two birds with one stone—getting a walk and getting something you needed.

RobinW, yay for down several lbs and feeling good mentally! Kudos on staying 100% OP and for getting your exercise in. It sounds like you’re doing well on the stress end. I can relate to all of the pitfalls of working with your SO. Good for you for making non-work time together.

[AnneWonders]

Coaches/Buddies An exceptionally great day today. I was home with DS who was recovering from his fever from yesterday. On plan all day. No run, but that is the way it needed to be, and I'm on track for tomorrow. And I did do some strength training, in the way of pushups, lunges, and squat jumps with the boy. He thinks squat jumps are super cool, and an invitation to crawl under.

Feels great to string a few together. Weight is dropping back to something more like what I'm used to seeing as well. Next up, new territory.

gardenerjoy Hurray for finishing NaNoWriMo! That is a huge deal. Sounds like getting back on the exercise wagon will do a body good.

Kim I just worked one skill at a time in CBDFL. Worked out just fine. Then you have to keep doing #1 while you master #2 and so on. There was a nice checklist if I remember right.

BillBE I think once in a while having the Boston Creme Pie is a good choice. Who'd want to go through life without it? I really believe it is about the patterns rather than the individual incidents. The trick is keeping the small stuff from becoming a pattern.

RobinW Glad reconnecting with your husband is helping the stress levels. Good to see you are on plan, and that the meditation podcasts are good.

Shepherdess The easiest place for me to say no to snacks is the grocery store. I dread when DH goes to Costco and brings home the giant sized junk food. Sounds like you've got a great plan for dealing with it.

'Night everyone!

Anne

[KidsLibrarylady]

Two sick kids and a sick husband. I will let you figure out who is the worst patient.

Glad to see so many people do so well at Thanksgiving!

Hoping to get back on track and back to posting within the next couple of days.

My husband sent me this link and I thought it was interesting and wondering what others thought. Specifically looking at the self control as a limited resource part: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self_control

Hope all is well!