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Old 04-10-2008, 08:55 AM   #76  
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Hi all....still going strong here. I'm consistently planning my food, eating according to plan, exercising 6 or 7 times a week, referring to my advantage list, remembering responses, eating sitting down, passing up sweets even when they're in front of me during a boring or frustrating meeting, passing up even healthy food when it's not planned, posting on the South Beach Diet board. WOW!!!!...credit me....and credit Judith Beck!!!!

(I am not consistently eating slowly and mindfully without distractions...I know this is one I still need to keep working at)

I had one self-sabotoging thought the other day. It was mid-afternoon, about a half an hour before I'd normally eat my snack, which was to be a sugar free yogurt. I was headed home and I decided I really wanted a Starbucks Lite Frappacino (something not on South Beach officially, but which I allow myself as a snack up to once a week during the summer). I started to tell myself that Beck is about learning to think like a thin person, and thin people do get to sometimes act on eating impulses...they don't have to do all this planning and stick to a plan. I should get to do it too.

I ended up talking myself down from getting the frap by remembering that I'm still really in the early stages of this. I still have to write down my food and stick to my plan. For now, I have NO CHOICE about unplanned eating. For now, I'm still working on the parts of thinking like a thin person that are about becoming less attached to food, more attuned to hunger and satisfaction, more able to pass up food just because it's there. For now, I need the structure that I get from planning and sticking to the plan. That may change eventually, but not yet.

I am curious to hear from long time Beck-ers, whether you get to to point of occasionally giving in to food impulses and being okay with that.
WOW! you actually so deserve the Credit! you are putting all that thought into it AND you did a NO CHOICE thing...

of course on SBD that once a week treat when we are closer to our final goal is perfectly fine.... it's planned for... so maybe when you PLAN for it it would be ok?
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Old 04-10-2008, 09:02 AM   #77  
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Hi coaches

My food frenzy has passed. I calmed down last night. Then hopped on the scale to see 261, and this morning 258.8. I've eaten off plan since Sunday, the day after Beck was over for me, and I officially weigh in on Saturday so we'll see what I really did to myself and my weight then. I'm back on plan today. I am writing down my food, eating sitting down slowly and consciously, and getting some exercise in today. I am going to re-read the book, get re-aquainted with Beck, but I am moving forward. credit moi for getting back on track. I have once more proven to myself that I can't eat what i want and not have consequences. Wonder when I'll really get that? Wonder how many times "circumstances" will converge and I'll be off eating again only to return and lose the same the weight I just lost all over again? Will I ever really be done with this? God I hope so. I always know when I am at 260. At 260 it's harder for me to breathe. I think that's the upper threshold of my physical body limits where I function normally. Above 260 I start to fall apart. Why do I go there over and over again? More Beck is needed, more forcefully applied methinks. I have my work cutout for me. I never would have thought I was so resistant to all this. It makes me feel sad. What part of me doesn't want this? Why? Sheesh. well all I know is I can stay lost and feeling down and negative and defeated but where's that going to lead me? Up up up on the scale and into illness and less mobility. I know I don't want that. I really truly don't and that's good to know too. I've got a lot of living I want to do. lots of things to make and see and participate in yet. Places to explore. Things to write about. Living. Lots of living. I want to be happy and healthy and I need to keep this in mind.

Now, in reality, drama queen-ness aside, I followed Beck for 42 days. A little wiggle here and there, nothing major. I ate off plan 4 days after the program ended. So I was on plan 42/46 days = 91% Isn't this an "A" in school terms? At my school it is. .. bordering on A+. Wow. Apply a little math and it's like magic. I can't believe that I considered myself a failure! I'm NOT a failure... NOT A FAILURE. I've had a bump, a re-adjustment and a test I may had put some lbs back on but they will come back off in a week or so if I continue down the road and practice what I have learned. Credit moi for doing the math.

BillBlueEyes What are you? Some kind of genius?? I had to laugh at how you gathered the three of us up in your email and pointed us in each other's direction, so we can support each other to get through the rough patch we seem to be in. It takes away the loneliness and the "why can't I get this... eveyone else does" feeling when you acknowledge, "oh maybe it's just cause we're human beings that we flounder..." nothing more, nothing less, no Big Sign of our failure at doing this or our desire to self-destruct. Just a bump. A simple easily traversed bump. You cannot know how grateful I am to have read your note. I want to say "Thank you for posting even when I feel like crap." (Isn't that the ultimate in self-centeredness??? Sheesh.)Thanks. Your faith in me lifts me up. Thanks.

maryblu I too love your definition of the good life re: lifting saddles and rakes. For me it'd be holding a paintbrush and hearing my cat purr... maybe having the ability to turn a phrase as well. I hope it will soon be "jumping on my bike and riding to my favorite rock to watch the sunset." Ahh! Something to aim for. Thanks!

mom3 Welcome to our Beck group! If you've been reading the posts you see what we do here. Join in! Post what day you're working on and what's going on, how you're finding it... I look forward to hearing what you think!

hbuchwald Hope your skiing went well and you had fun. How's your Beck program today? I think I have found my footing again... you? It actually is very good to know that things aren't black and white, that we do retain skills we choose to use and other skills we set aside, but we have them. I guess I am discovering that I need to use them all in order to move forward and to deal with losing weight. A few of them keeps me standing still or gaining weight, all of them have me losing weight and feeling like I am dealing with my weight and health issues. It feels better to face things for me. It actually isn't easier for me to binge eat and not post and feel mopey and defeated. That's no way to live a life. All the best to you today!

kuhljeanie There's nothing like seeing the end in sight. I wish you good night's of restful sleep, good food to keep you going, and brilliant insights when you need to wow them!

ladybugnessa Day 18. You're moving along! It's great you are aware of when you are full. You do deserve a credit for that. I have been eating way past full the past few days and I no longer like it, or need it. Not every day. I think this all started when I saw the roast chicken dinner sign at that restaurant a week or so ago. I started to fixate in my mind on "lots of food--all I want" Quantities. Lots of food. I so want that. I often crave that totally over-stuffed feeling. When I get eating like that, I just stop inside. All my thoughts, all my worries, all my questions just stop. I am focused on how full I am, how much my tummy may hurt, how bad I am for doing it... but I am not plagued by what's really bothering me... as they say "If I have a problem and I eat over it, then I have two problems." I have found this to be too true every time. Have a great day today!


maplover It never occurred to me to "doll up" my response cards. You're right. They should make me happy when I see them/use them. I might give this a whirl. Thanks! Happy to hear you are doing well...
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Old 04-10-2008, 09:38 AM   #78  
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Nessa, I already had decided that it's fine for me to plan a frap and have one on a day when it's planned in advance. That fits w/in the flexibility from strict South Beach that I allow myself. My question is more will I ever get to start having unplanned treats?

Last edited by barbpos; 04-10-2008 at 01:14 PM.
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Old 04-10-2008, 03:39 PM   #79  
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Hello,
Thanks for all the warm welcomes.

I am on day 7. I'm finding this program very difficult. I've been on the "sit down while eating" day for about 3 weeks. I just find it embarassingly hard to sit to eat everything.
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Old 04-10-2008, 03:46 PM   #80  
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Nessa, I already had decided that it's fine for me to plan a frap and have one on a day when it's planned in advance. That fits w/in the flexibility from strict South Beach that I allow myself. My question is more will I ever get to start having unplanned treats?

oh wow... that's a very good question. you know the good doc seems receptive to questions have you considered emailing her?
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Old 04-10-2008, 03:47 PM   #81  
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Hello,
Thanks for all the warm welcomes.

I am on day 7. I'm finding this program very difficult. I've been on the "sit down while eating" day for about 3 weeks. I just find it embarassingly hard to sit to eat everything.

hi. do you want to talk about this? I know for me slowing down and eating mindfully is PAINFUL.... i'm still working on that. are you sitting MOST of the time? some of the time? NEVER?

any idea why you can't/don't/won't sit?
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Old 04-10-2008, 04:05 PM   #82  
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hey all, this will be very short...after the stomach bug, i got the blue bug. youknow, the one where you are just not happy with anything. no good reason, just want to crawl into bed and stay there until it passes. that's where i am at. food is ok but not great, have not done step class since last thursday b/c i had a major asthma attack and had to leave class early (how embarrassing) and i was giving my lungs a week off. i have been on the treadmill some and i did take yoga on tuesday. i couldn't today b/c the girl who covers me was off today.
anyway i jsut wanted to drop in and let everybody know that i am still here and am reading everyone's post, i am just being selfish right now and not saying a whole lot. this will pass and things will get better.
thanks for letting me come here and say a whole lot of nothing!
amy
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Old 04-10-2008, 04:16 PM   #83  
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hey all, this will be very short...after the stomach bug, i got the blue bug. youknow, the one where you are just not happy with anything. no good reason, just want to crawl into bed and stay there until it passes. that's where i am at. food is ok but not great, have not done step class since last thursday b/c i had a major asthma attack and had to leave class early (how embarrassing) and i was giving my lungs a week off. i have been on the treadmill some and i did take yoga on tuesday. i couldn't today b/c the girl who covers me was off today.
anyway i jsut wanted to drop in and let everybody know that i am still here and am reading everyone's post, i am just being selfish right now and not saying a whole lot. this will pass and things will get better.
thanks for letting me come here and say a whole lot of nothing!
amy
you just take care of YOU!
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Old 04-11-2008, 03:00 AM   #84  
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Howdy,

Great to read that some are being so successful-inspiring. Right now I have the Beck blahs-Just keep eating too many treats and sabotaging my 1600 cal max for the day. this to will pass(hopefully soon) Letting some annoying concerns (standard worries about family, money and health) to be the "reasons" to overeat and to undermine that focus needed for me to walk the food limiting tight rope. Keep swimming- it has become so relaxing, very calming and my most pain free time of the day. Been trying to increase my swimming time this week to 1 1/2 hrs each day and finding that a bit too exhaustive-took a nap when I should have been making dinner. Read others are having some difficulty with continously sustaining All the Beck strategies. Hang in- keep reading, and if possible posting-then things will click again. Stress in all of our lives ebbs and flows and soon the energy will once again will be there to do all the dietary steps to lose weight. Been both student and teacher and the end of the semester is a Bear of work, reports and testing. Hang in the end of school is near!! Some of us may be treading water in our food behaviors, but we all have come too far to give up and retrun to the old unhealthy ways. Kind of funny I am getting the most compliments about the weight loss and and now doing some distructive night time eating-no sense.

first goal to work on is NO eating after dinner.

Much serenity and success to all

sue
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Old 04-11-2008, 05:18 AM   #85  
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Thumbs up Friday

Diet Coaches – Yesterday presented multiple opportunities. I had three (3!!!) events in the same day with FREE lunch, LOL. Had an on-plan lunch at the first, served on a plate, sitting down, eating mindfully while listening to a speaker, ignoring a full, big plate of good looking cookies with not much difficulty - my plan doesn't do desserts at lunch. Ignored even larger full trays of cookies and cakes at the second with not much difficulty - my plan doesn't do desserts at lunch. At the third, one of the platters was empty except for some cookie crumbs. To my absolute astonishment, a hand, attached to an arm, picked up a crumb and just stuffed it in my mouth. No plate, no pause, no thinking. Just POP. I have no reason to believe that the arm was connected to a brain, LOL. That wasn't on plan, nor an acceptable interpretation of my own definition of opportunity for quality item per the discussion below. Oh Well. CREDIT moi for at least reporting it.

Sue (CoastalSue) - Ouch for the "Beck blahs." Kudos for continuing the great swimming and Kudos for remaining so self aware. Sending supporting thoughts for you plan for "NO eating after dinner."

Heidi (hbuchwald) - Waving toward the ski slopes.

Barbara (barbpos) – Kudos for all the Beck strategies that you are consistently working - quite a nice group there. Ouch that slowly and mindfully remain a challenge. I never cease to be amazed at how many of us were BOTH wolfing down our food AND not aware that we doing it. BIG Kudos for using your NO CHOICE card on the Starbucks Lite Frappucino and Kudos for bringing that here for us.

RE: "I am curious to hear from long time Beck-ers, whether you get to to point of occasionally giving in to food impulses and being okay with that." For me (7 months doing Beck, 13 months maintenance), that's still an issue. Impulse eating feels like permission to eat irresponsibly, so I have to avoid (e.g. unexpected delicious cookies at a technical show yesterday); I can feel the loss of responsibility when I do it. Opportunity eating is the tougher one, particularly when I can afford the calories (e.g. one quality dark chocolate offered while on a nature walk); I don't feel the loss of responsibility when I accept. If my feelings were as sharply clear as I've underlined, that would be my answer. However, I continue to struggle with your question because I'm concerned that I'm exposing myself to that slippery slope to uncontrolled eating - that my distinction of a one-time opportunity can be easily expanded. Many have pointed out that opportunities to celebrate appear almost daily, so that opportunity itself is NOT a legitimate reason to go off-plan.

Wish I had a more definitive answer for you than my "YES to an infrequent opportunity for a single, small quality item; NO to regularly occurring opportunity or to a less than quality item." I have, by the way, included the "opportunity for small taste of quality" in my food plan which, at least, allows me to feel honest.

onebyone – Yeah that you're feeling more calm. Ouch for the scale. Kudos for "back on plan today." Great demo for all of us on how to get back on track. Kudos, Kudos, Kudos. And thanks for demonstrating a classic error in thinking; of course you are "NOT A FAILURE." It's just amazing to me how my mind can go to a place like, I am a failure, for the smallest bump in the road. Thanks for all the thoughtful posting.

amy (gahundy) – Ouch for the "blue bug." Kudos for standing it down by posting here. Perhaps you might be able to use that success to choose another specific action to stand it down - perhaps a short walk. The Beck strategies lend themselves to JUST DOING IT even when it feels like imitation. Sending supporting thoughts for you to continue to break out.

Nessa (ladybugnessa) - LOL at your "CREDIT ME" and "CREDIT YOU" icons - what fun! Congrats for holding steady with the weight. Ouch that you're still struggling with Program-day 18: Change Your Definition of Full. Might help to get us all talking about that - it happens to be the next in our group working through the book. Do you have time to consider starting us on a discussion about Program-day 18?

mom3 - Kudos for marching forward to Program-day 7: Arrange Your Environment. And Kudos that you are so self aware that sitting is still a challenge. Thoughts: are you able to schedule enough time for mindful eating? Perhaps a Response Card like, "I deserve this time" would help. For myself, to eat slowly when alone, I read something of active interest (e.g. morning newspaper). I'm able to pause to think about each bite and to put my fork down between bites. Is this Beck? I don't know; it's what's working for me at this stage.


Readers – "… When I first developed Cognitive Therapy as a treatment for depression, I had no idea that a whole new generation of psychologists and psychiatrists would apply this treatment to a wide range of psychiatric disorders, psychological difficulties, and behavioral health problems. … " From the Forward by Aaron T. Beck, M.D., Beck, pg 10.

__________________
XXXXXXX 7 XXXXXXX 14 XXXXXXX 21 XXXXXXX 28 XXXXXXX 35 XXXXXXX 42
Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve met your goal. Congratulations!

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Old 04-11-2008, 07:32 AM   #86  
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no time this morning... Bill what would I need to do to help out with day 18? you can PM me if you like.
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Old 04-11-2008, 08:31 AM   #87  
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Hi coaches

Not much time this morning. I am off to school early again, last time for the year I think. Hurray and credit moi for getting through the school year.

I did well yesterday with my food. I half wrote it down! will fill it in today on the bus... and of course go to today's food. Still not DVD exercising but did get some good walking in. My scale continues to adjust itself. 254 this morning. Happy to see that. Looking forward to tomorrow's weighin and the official start of a new week for me. Glad to see this one end... though it is ending on a high note AND in reality, I ate off plan 4 days. Here's to more weeks on plan before I get the next bump oin the road. That'd be awesome... or longer?!

Have a great day...
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Old 04-11-2008, 09:45 AM   #88  
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hi everyone! just another flyby - but a really needed one. so glad to read that onebyone is feeling more back on track. unfortunately i'm not there yet. i weighed myself this morning and had to take my single charm off the bracelet. reality. gotta face it. i've put 5 pounds back on in the last three weeks with almost daily overeating of you name it. (mostly sweets.) i'm exhausted - there's a huge pile of clean laundry on my bed, i have to bake a friend's wedding cake this weekend for her wedding in two weeks because next weekend we're going to Florida for DH's brother's wedding. in the meantime, i have four papers and three group projects. and a take-home exam. haven't done my taxes yet either, now that i think about it. i've been trying not to think about it. the marathon is in four weeks and i'm grossly undertrained for it. i tried to do a 4-mile speed run on wednesday but only got two miles in before i had to stop. my body just sort of hurts - shin splints, swollen knees, tight calves. haven't been to the gym since.

ugh! blues bug is right. just have to remember my wagon will still be there in a month, even if i have gained back a few pounds and i feel huge. i felt tiny at 185 coming from 205. funny that it feels so big now. i know it'll come off, and i bought myself an early graduation gift - really splashed out and got a sensewear monitor (it's like a bodybugg, but the new version is already out.) even managed to finangle a late membership with a CSA. just trying to be gentle with myself and keep putting one foot in front of the other. heidi and amy, if you're feeling like i'm feeling, giving you a big cyberhug! thanks to everyone (bill, sue, onebyone, i'm talking to you) for the spirit lifting thoughts. three more weeks. three more weeks. there's no amount of damage i can do in three weeks that can't be undone.

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Old 04-11-2008, 10:17 AM   #89  
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Good Morning Everyone!!

I still have to catch up with everyone, but a bit to everyone!!

I finished my first "read" thru of the book. I then decided to go back and start at day 1 and work the program from the very beginning.

Have a great day everyone!
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Old 04-11-2008, 11:53 AM   #90  
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Morning all,

BBE: thank you so much for your thoughtful response. I really appreciate it. It is definitely a "thin line", "delicate balance" potentially "slippery slope" kind of issue. I'll have to think about occasional quality opportunity eating in the future, knowing that right now, it's NO CHOICE for me. I am, after all, only one-quarter into a 100 pound weightloss.

Jean: Sorrry to hear you're struggling. Remember, the wagon is just waiting for you to hop back on.

One-by-one: congrats on the good day.

Nessa: you must be busy today...hope all's well.

Robin: congrats on getting through the book and deciding to get right back to the beginning.

Sue: 1 1/2 hours a day of swimming!!! That's great!!!
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