Hi everyone…
My name is Delilah and I am 21 years old and 5’ 8”.
I have been overweight for my entire life (I hate the world fat so I refuse to use it)… and I’m ready for a change. I was at my all time highest weight (237lbs) about 1 month ago and have recently begun working towards my goal of 160lbs.
Although I have been overweight my whole life, I think I have a warped image of myself. Most people I’ve talked to claim that they think they look worse then they actually do…. while I think I look better then I actually do. Don’t get me wrong, I know I don’t look like Jessica Simpson or anything, but oddly enough, I am very proportioned. I have recently started to investigate my warped self image issues and have concluded that I have the weirdest body ever (however, not a bad body). I have inquired about the weight of some people I know and others on the internet and most people with my dimensions (neck, bust, weight, hip measurements) are almost ALWAYS under 200 lbs.
EXAMPLE: I am a bridesmaid for my friend’s wedding in about a month and there is another girl who a little bigger also in the wedding party. She was fitted for a size 22 and I was fitted for a size 18. Now, she told me that she weighs 192lbs. So I am almost 50lbs heavier than she is? That seems nuts.
Now obviously I found this quite curious and really when I look at myself I think ‘Man… if I lose 77lbs…. I’m going to look like Nicole Ritchie!!!! GROSS’. I don’t want to be a skinny girl… I like being curvy. However, in two years I intend on getting a job for an environmental consulting agency which requires a lot of field work (I am working towards my masters in hydrogeology). When my company sends me to the Himalayas or some other insane place with crazy topography, I want to enjoy my hike through the bush, and not just think ‘HOW FAR IS IT TO THE TOP????????’
I want to be fit. Plain and simple.
So, how am I going to get to my goal? I have no idea… but I’m going to get there.
For the past month, I have been on a diet of mostly veggies and fruit for breakfast and lunch with a chicken or fish with veggies for supper. I drink a lot of water and have completely cut out baking (agh… I love to bake) and eating after my last meal. I have calculated my caloric intake to be averaging about 1500-1700/day. I have also added exercise to the mix 5-6 times a week (40 minutes of hard cardio, 20 minutes of resistance training).
Now, one would think that this would result in some serious weight loss in the beginning… but no. I’m only 4 pounds down. My body is refusing to let go of the fat… or it is building an insane amount of muscle (heh heh… not likely).
Anyway, I figure that I can use all the support I can get, and I have found that reading these threads have helped me the past month. So I’m going to stop hiding behind the screen and let you all know that you’ve all inspired me to keep going.
I’ll keep you posted on how my crazy journey through self- image, control, esteem and all the other hoopla is progressing.
- D
This is my story...
