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Old 05-08-2005, 11:34 AM   #1  
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Default Fighting a losing battle

Hello to all.
First off, I am glad that I found this forum. I am 36 with 2 children and have always been fat. Since I was born, I've been fat. I am very depressed about it now as it seems like I will never win this battle. As a stay at home mom, I don't get to talk much with adults, which seems to make it worse.

I have been crying all weekend about this and I think my husband is tired of it. If I were him, I would be sick of it too!!

I gained 50 lbs with my 1st child and got pregnant again when he was only nine months old. I am up to 290 pounds and am 5'7". I feel like everyone stares at me when I go out - I am a size 24 - and I don't even look in the mirror anymore.

Even though my husband says he still loves me no matter what size I am, that doesn't make me feel any better. I have a closet full of clothes sized 18 and 20 that I keep, hoping I can fit into them again.

I really need your support, please. I just feel so depressed.

I am sorry this is so long.

Sienna
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Old 05-08-2005, 12:38 PM   #2  
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Hi Sienna
My Name is Luz and Im new to the site also. I have felt like you feel and I know what u mean when your spouse says he loves you no matter what size you are. Thats awesome and sweet. But its an issue with us . Inside US. I cant say that I still dont have days that I hate being a fat lady. I have hard days too. But I hate being this big so much that Its what give me the power to find a solution to my problem. I was a stay at home mom before my divorce. I was at almost 300 I didnt have any real friends that i could look to for support. At that time I just wanted it so much for fear of losing my husband that I went on a drastic diet and lost over 100 pounds. I shortly divorced after because It was an issue with me that hadnt healed. Inside of me. I was dieting for all the wrong reasons. years later here I am Im a divorced single mom of 3 I have a 6 year old daughter, and 2 sons ages 11,13. We are a southern hispanic family . so in a nutshell that means its common to eat things that are not good for us because its what is the custom around here. But I can say I still have no real friends and its sites like this that give me fuel. I have been on the atkins for over one year (fell of the wagon for a total of 4 months) I lost 65 Ive gained back about 30 and i started my atkins 10 days ago and lost 10 so far so here I go again this time nothings stopping me. For excersice I do as i did before , take my little girl on wagon rides (in this case im the horse pulling the wagon =) ) and i dance by myself here . I do things with my kids, because after work I want to do something that I can include them in. Any ways hope this helps a little. If u want to talk Im here !!! Keep your chin up . You started the process of life change just by writing here today. Its a process and you got your foot in CONGRATULATIONS!!!!
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Old 05-08-2005, 12:51 PM   #3  
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Hi Luz:

Thanks for writing back so soon. Just reading your post made me feel so much better. You are so right, it is an issue in US and we have to resolve it. I am african american, so I so know what you mean about eating stuff that is not good for us. But I know if you are a div. mom of 3 and you can do it, so can I.

I had the most success on the atkins diet - lost 7 lbs in a week before I got pregnant with my first. Between getting pg so fast the 2nd time and breastfeeding, I haven't had a break.

My resolve is to join this board and walk. That is an exercise I can push the kids in the stroller, get them some air and then after take them to the park.

I don't want to embarrass my kids by being the fat mom. I plan on being very active in the PTA etc. so I know how kids are!!

Luz, thanks again, so much!!!! You may not think it's much, but you gave me a little light at the end of the tunnel!!
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Old 05-08-2005, 01:27 PM   #4  
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Default Hi Sierra

Hi Sierra,

don't beat yourself up over your weight! The first thing you have to learn to be successful is to love you no matter what size you are. From there you can work with the shape.

I've tried Atkins, did it a lot of times successfully until I went off it and the pounds piled back on. The problem is that people like sweet stuff and fruits. I think if one wants to live a low carb lifestyle, the South Beach diet may be the better solution as it allows you fruits as well which have natural sugar content and South Beach is less restrictive that way.

I've given up Diets and decided that the only thing that will work for me now is self control. I eat what i want, when I want it but I control the portion and instead of going for seconds, I just don't. I also eat out of a Cereal Bowl instead of a plate. It fits less and I am usually satisfied. I eat a lot of Fruits and Veggies, simply because I prefer them.

I know being big can be very very frustrating especially if it sort of snug up on you. You can't turn back time overnight and the pounds won't melt off that fast either, but what you can do is sit back, re-evaluate your eating, and adjust some. Don't look at this as a diet but a whole new Lifestyle

You can do it!

Mel
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Old 05-08-2005, 03:38 PM   #5  
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Hi Mel:

Your words are very encouraging and you are so right. I want to try the Atkins first because it will give me some noticeable results and I like the feeling of being carb free - at least for a little while.

I am modifying my food intake to basically fruits, veggies, meats and the occasional sweet treat. My biggest problem is guess what....getting in the exercise!!!

So I'm going to join the walkers group and start posting my miles.

I am so glad that I found this site - you guys really give me a great outlook!

Sienna
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Old 05-08-2005, 07:28 PM   #6  
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Sienna,
Im happy to hear that you are feeling a little better =) . I can tell you are a person with a great personality most of us plus girls are . Any way I hope u are having a good mothers day. I had a interesting day myself. It sounds like your on a plan for your self that is awesome...yay!! And I can honestly tell you the best diet is the one that you create that will fit you. It the best kind because its the kind that we stick to. Well Im off to get ready and pull that wagon!!

Luz
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Old 05-08-2005, 07:31 PM   #7  
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LOL Exercise is my big hang up too Sierra! You just gotta kick yourself in the behind sometimes. I have been putting the treadmill off all day but i know I HAVE to get on it... even if it won't be till midnight at the rate I am regressing today! I tend to prefer to take my dog for a walk. It helps getting me motivated. I also often yack on the cell phone while I walk.... it makes the time fly like nothing and before you know it 30 minutes went by!
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