[codemonkey]

Hi there. Just wanted to introduce myself.

I am Catherine and I am 34 years old and to put it bluntly, I am fat. More than fat. Clinically obese. I've been struggling with motivation lately but I've decided enough is enough.

I've always struggled to keep my weight down and in a family where the other women are teeny tiny and struggle to gain weight, that's hard. In 2008, I had my first "Right, I need to lose weight" moment and went from a UK size 16/18 to a UK size 12. My first size 12 since I was about 15. I didn't do it very healthily though - it involved eating only one meal a day and far too much caffeine. After I moved in with my husband in 2010, I started to gain weight again. After he proposed, I started losing weight again. I got back down to a UK size 12, from a 14, but I also spent 1.5 hours a day in the gym and ate mostly porridge.

We got married in 2011 and I swore I'd get back on the diet and exercise regime after the honeymoon. I failed and I've ballooned (to use the tabloid term) to a UK size 16 on the top and an 18/20 on the bottom to accommodate my thighs. I'm the biggest I've ever been, but the weight isn't coming off.

I've done a variety of diets and keep losing and gaining the same 6lbs over and over. I'm not sure if this is because of the medication I'm on for a long term health condition (weight gain is a common side effect), but I've had my thyroid and hormone levels checked and they're ok. The meds also make me drowsy, which makes me want to sleep, not exercise. Even if it is the medication, there must be something I can do, because I've just split my favourite jeans with my massive thighs and I don't want to buy them in a size 20 or 22.

I've just had my lightbulb moment again - I was looking for a dress to wear to a wedding we're attending next month and I saw a beautiful one, but they didn't do it in my size. I'm fed up of feeling fat, unattractive and like a huge heifer and I remember how fantastic I felt when I was a 12.

I'm realistic. I'm never going to be an 8 and probably not a 10 either because of my large build (tall, broad shoulders, wide hips), but I'm gonna get back to my size 12s and feel like me again.

[TheFinalFifteen]

I'm rooting for you

[thisisart]

Since I have similar measurements, I definitely relate. Being tall, it has always been easy to ignore the weight gain since tall gals "wear it well", but at a certain point height can't hide everything. It sounds like you've gotten to a place where you want to get back to a comfortable weight, just make sure you do it slowly and the right way this time and I'm sure you'll hit your goal.
Best of luck and I look forward to following your journey!

[Mrs Snark]

Welcome! I also have a similar build as you -- you can do this! Stick with your plan -- and if you have a slip up remember that we ALL have them -- don't panic, just get right back on plan, and you will get to your goal! You're in this for the long haul, before you know it you'll be back in your 12s!

[codemonkey]

Wow, thanks for the welcome. Feel all special now.

Tomorrow the weight loss and road to a new me begins. Just need to remind myself that I actually do like salad and vegetables because my brain tries to tell me I don't

I've recruited the help of a guy at work to bully me into going to the gym - it's in our actual work building so no excuses - and the dog will be getting treated to longer walks, even if that means I have to get up much earlier. Groan.

Also need to dust off the callanetics dvd which is great for inch loss and muscle tightening without bulking out - as I have a tendency to look a bit Amazonian.

Wish me luck!

[Mrs Snark]

Your taste buds will evolve over time as you change your diet and settle into your new lifestyle. If you've been eating alot of processed junky food (like I always did when I was off-plan) fresh, healthy food may taste bland for a while. So if you don't like something in the first few months, be sure to try it again later!

My dogs appreciate my devotion to their walks, which are so good for all of us -- your dog is going to be thrilled with the longer walks too!

[Liz2266]

It sounds like we have the same problem.. at the same size.. and the same age. I look forward to following your journey! I'm starting over again, too. We got this!!!