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09-20-2011, 02:08 PM
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#1
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http://www.3fatchicks.com
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Montana
Posts: 20
S/C/G: 227/189/135
Height: 5'8
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Trying to get healthy after the losing my teenage son
Good Afternoon to you all,
I have been battling with my weight my whole life, well that is after I had kids. I have always been a little bigger but not as big as I am now. I have always been an emotional, bored eater and food seemed to have healed all the wounds for the moment. Recently I have suffered a parents worst nightmare, losing my 17 year old son to a single car wreck. I am on our small towns Volunteer Fire Department and EMT Department. So out of all of our kids 4 are mine and 4 are his, with that being said my son had just dropped his sister off at home and was going to meet his father for dinner. While my better half, I and 3 of our kids were on our way home when we received the page of a car wreck, we were on our way to the scene when one of our fire fighters called us and said it was our son Austin. We had drove up onto the scene of the accident and my worst nightmare had just become a reality. I tell you this because before all of this happened he was my support in my weight loss. I just joined a program called go figure (myself and my husband) and was seeing success. We have gone through so much stress here lately, it started in June our house was flooded out and we were with out a home, we were just getting back into our home and Austin's car accident happened, then a week later after the accident we suffered another loss to the family and a cousin who was renting a house of ours (right behind our house) shot and killed himself, leaving our girls to find him, to us then suffering a devastating blow to our business. Austin pushed, helped and wanted me to become more healthier so I can be around a lot longer for all of them. He would work out with me, help with the meals and just be supportive. Since his accident I have not been able to lose any more weight but I haven't gained any either. I am not sure if it is due to all of the stress or I need to give my system some kind of shock to get motivated. I have stopped going to the gym since everything has happened which I am sure has a lot to do with it, plus they tell me working out is great for depression but I just can't seem to find it in me to go any more. I guess what a need is a good support system any ideas or help would be much appreciated. I look forward to hearing from you and you all have a safe and fabulous day!!
Thanks,
NuttyAutty
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09-20-2011, 02:11 PM
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#2
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Junior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 7
S/C/G: 258/254.2/158
Height: 5 ft 7 in
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I am so sorry for your loss  I wish you the best of luck in your weight loss efforts. Know that your son is in a better place and cheering you on in spirit!
*hugs*
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09-20-2011, 02:15 PM
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#3
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Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Madison VA
Posts: 75
S/C/G: 200/197/130
Height: 5'0"
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I am sorry for your loss and wish you the best of luck on your journey.
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09-20-2011, 02:17 PM
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#4
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Junior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Boulder, CO
Posts: 23
S/C/G: 184.7/165
Height: 5'4" (In my heyday, I was 5'6"...)
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I cannot imagine what you're going through. When you said "a parent's worst nightmare" you absolutely nailed it. I wish I could come up with some words of comfort. Just know that we'll all be with you as you struggle through this almost-impossible loss. And go easy on yourself about the weight; in time you'll be more able to deal with this. You've certainly come to the right place for support!
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09-20-2011, 02:18 PM
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#5
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Junior Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Boulder, CO
Posts: 23
S/C/G: 184.7/165
Height: 5'4" (In my heyday, I was 5'6"...)
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Where do you live in Montana? I grew up in Kalispell, and get up there a couple of times a year.
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09-20-2011, 02:21 PM
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#6
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Je suis prest
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: NY
Posts: 41
Height: 5'7"
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Wow, you've really been through the ringer. I can only imagine how tough it must be for you, and that food might be a temporary comfort. Maybe you could view losing weight as a kind of memorial to your son? After all, it was something the two of you did together... perhaps getting healthier for your other kids is a way to honor his memory?
That said, be gentle on yourself... as a mother I know this is absolutely the worst nightmare for most of us. Time to heal and taking things slowly is the way to go. And if you ever need a shoulder to cry on, this seems like a great, supportive place for it.
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09-20-2011, 03:04 PM
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#7
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Feed Your Freedom
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Carolina Girl
Posts: 4,425
S/C/G: 399.8/362.0/224
Height: 5'8
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http://www.sharonbowman.org/index.html
she was on the tv show HEAVY...
go read here...this amazing lady can so relate...to your loss and your desire to be healthy...read all about her...then find her on facebook...she will write you back...she is ONE STRONG AMAZING SOUL!!
i wish you peace and God's healing
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09-20-2011, 06:41 PM
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#8
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http://www.3fatchicks.com
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Montana
Posts: 20
S/C/G: 227/189/135
Height: 5'8
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Thank you everyone for sharing your thoughts and encouraging words....I have so many reasons for positive change in my life and it starts with me and my health....again Thank you!!
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09-20-2011, 07:50 PM
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#9
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: upstate NY
Posts: 1,822
S/C/G: 214/211/150
Height: 5'5"
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Nutty,
You and your family are in my prayers. I am crying right now. You are sooooo right, a parents worse nightmare, there is no greater loss. I hope in time the great memories will get you through, it will take alot of time. Don't stress about your weight right now, just try to make good choices and try to exercise (walking) as it will help with depression. God bless you all and may Austin rest in peace. cyber hugs!
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09-20-2011, 08:17 PM
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#10
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Junior Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 29
S/C/G: 210/194.5/140
Height: 5'5
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I just wanted to say how sad I feel for you, your girls and your family. So much shock and trauma for everyone. I can't imagine the range of emotions you must all be dealing with.
In addition to your finding a wonderful support group here, is there someone (social worker, counsellor) in your community (or nearby community) that could help you and the kids cope with such terrible grief?
Wishing you a restful evening....you are in our thoughts and prayers....
(hugs)
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09-20-2011, 08:34 PM
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#11
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Davis, Ca
Posts: 23,149
S/C/G: 204/114/120
Height: 5'
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So, so sorry for your loss.You and your family are in my prayers that you may find peace.
Last edited by bargoo; 09-20-2011 at 08:36 PM.
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09-23-2011, 11:58 AM
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#12
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http://www.3fatchicks.com
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Montana
Posts: 20
S/C/G: 227/189/135
Height: 5'8
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Thank You Carolina Girl, I did contact Sharon and she is truly an inspirational woman!! Thank you all for your encouraging words, my family and I have all just started counseling through peace hospice, I highly recommend this organization for anyone that is suffering a loss. I am going to really focus on my weight loss not only for myself and keeping my mind occupied on positive instead of all the negative we have endured but also for my son Austin. I would not be doing him any justice if I didn't follow through what we had started together and his wishes to see me healthy. I look forward to this great support system, only if I can figure out this site a little more...finding out I am not as computer savy as I thought I was and making new friends on here. Hope you all have a great and wonderful day!!
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09-23-2011, 12:10 PM
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#13
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Gotta keep trying!
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: NC.
Posts: 756
S/C/G: 285/ticker/150.
Height: 5'6"
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Very sorry for your loss <3
This is a great forum for support!
We are all here for you!
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09-23-2011, 04:03 PM
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#14
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 125
S/C/G: Pant Size 12/6/4
Height: 5'2"
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I am so sorry for your losses... How absolutely heartbreaking and devastating. I can not even begin to imagine what you are going through but I think you need to try and stay strong for your son - do it for his memory. He would want you to. I am sure he is looking down at you cheering you on.
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09-23-2011, 04:16 PM
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#15
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 881
S/C/G: 24W/10-12/10-12
Height: 5', 5"
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You are in my prayers...I'm cheering you on and praying for brighter days ahead....You are already strong and amazing! I'm praying God's comfort...
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