I am saving my life ...
I joined today and thank you for letting me. I started my blog today also which is called "I am saving my life" and I am guessing that most of the folk here understand that.
For me, this is the stamp on turning that corner I have needed to turn for the last ten years. To write things down makes them real. It does not feel like I was playing at trying to lose weight or feeling bad in oh so many ways about it, but there is a serious set in my mind, it is not happy, it is determined and I am going to lose 96lbs to save my life.
I am healthy now apart from fatty liver and gallstones. I don't have diabetes but I will unless I tackle this. I have a wonderful partner who deserves better than having to cope with my unhappiness with weight and physical limitations - and future fat-related fears. At 60 (soon) I have a chance to change the next 20 years, 30 if I am lucky, into something active, alert, rewarding and memorable.
For the past few years I have lost and gained weight. I am now aware and resolved that only loss is acceptable. I have been exercising, I have been on a low fat diet, I need to work harder at it without getting obsessed. Every day is a new day that I feel better walking that walk, breathing that healthier breath, losing that belly. I would say it is all uphill but I quail at the thought... I am not that fit for many hills ... yet.
I wish I felt less serious, I wish I did not feel like crying but if that is what it takes then I will do it because somewhere down the line I will be happier and laughing and embracing it more because at that time I will want to do it not just need to.
Hello
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