[Jelbb]

Ladies and gents, three and a half years ago... I thought I was fat.

Newly graduated from high school, I was self-conscious of my 137 lb frame to the extent of a certain degree of self hatred. Then I went to university and lived in the vending-machine that is residence... well. Let's just say I look back on myself in pictures and only WISH that I knew back then how good I really had it.

I'm now in my third year of university, and every single year I've lived in residence, first as a student, and now as a "Resident Assistant"-- basically, I get paid to live there and make sure the first years don't.. you know, set the building on fire, or kill themselves/each other. The problem with residence though.. is the vending machines, and the cafeterias... I don't even have to leave the current building I live in to get a burger and fries and soda and crap. I totally lack the motivation to go to the gym on a regular basis since I find exercise tedious for the most part... =/

THEN I lived in Ireland for four months this past summer where I learned that you don't go for coffee in Galway with friends, you go for a pint. And boy did Guinness and I become close friends. Averaging three casual pints a day does not do much for the wallet or the waistline.

I thought that coming home for the holidays would encourage a bit of weight loss since my mother doesn't tend to keep anything with sugar in the house, and she doesn't eat anything with gluten in it so that's not around either. The woman is a health fanatic and a fitness instructor.

But by god the little devil on my shoulder has a way. I had SUCH A SWEET-TOOTH tonight, and was so bored that I literally MADE myself chocolate icing... simply to eat it. How's that for getting around there being no junk food in the house? I have so much trouble controlling my urges for crap, in that 20 minutes between the craving and the beginnings of guilt, I have this insane ability to ignore my conscience.

People, I've hit a wall here. I need to get some self-control or willpower or support or SOMETHING if I'm ever gonna turn my **** around. Because I'm getting the first stretchmarks I've had since puberty, ones I didn't expect to have until at least pregnancy, and I was hoping both (the imminent kids AND the stretchmarks) would be a long way off.

P.S., Hi, I'm Jess, I'm a 20 year old Canadian who just ate a cup full of chocolate icing by itself and hates herself! Whoo!

[Casandra]

I can sure feel the culture shock. I was born in Illinois, raised there until I was 17, when I left to go live with my fiance in the UK.

My weight shot out of control the instant I touched down in this country.

I cant find a healthy balance, but I'm trying really hard to make a diet work with this chips n fish country :P

I'm 20 in May of 2008, and I've gone from being a 140lbs 15 year old to 186lbs as of my 19th birthday.

I was sick of it, and although I have insulin to blame for my apparent hardships of weightloss, I'll never give up!

My personal goal is to lose enough so my fiance can literally sweep me off my feet.

I wish you the best of luck and if you need a friend, I'm always looking for a good chat or conversation

[Jelbb]

Ahh, yeah, my friend Ash moved from Canada to England (Newcastle to live with the geordies, hee hee) and as soon as she got there she started to pack on the pounds. I dunno, everything seems to be FRIED in the UK, lol.

And yeah, you and I are around the same goal weights and starting points. We should keep tabs on each other! Have you got MSN? PM me!

[improbable]

I know what that feels like, for me it was boarding school, unlimited supplies of food, all free, and a grand total of 15 minutes for lunch to stuff your face iwth as much food sa possible, no time to figure out if you were still hungry or not... I'm sure you'll do great, good luck and welcome!