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Old 01-05-2015, 03:56 PM   #31  
started IP 7/23/14
 
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Originally Posted by Avalon1957 View Post
The other sort of interesting paradox is being fat (I think) has made me look younger -- since fat sort of "puffs you up" and fills up the space under your skin where wrinkles might creep in. I am 57.5 years old, yet people always tell me that I look more like 45. I have a feeling that as I continue to lose weight, I might start looking older (closer to my actual age) as the fat layer diminishes under my skin (face). In any case, I would rather be healthier (which translates to thinner) and look older - than be fatter and look younger but have a lot of health problems. It's more important to feel good and be healthy.
This has definitely been my experience. I always looked younger than I am and had no wrinkles on my face. Now I feel like my whole face is sagging, and I have lots of extra skin where my double+ chin used to be - I look old when I look in the mirror. I can, however, finally see a slightly smaller me (after 65+ lbs lost). For the first time in a long time, I am looking at my body in the mirror, not just my face.
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Old 01-05-2015, 10:43 PM   #32  
IP Feb 2014, P4 Oct 15/14
 
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I haven't even taken my after picture yet because although I surpassed my goal, I can't find a picture I like. I see way more imperfections, and seem to "notice" my fat more. It was my 15 year old DD who told me to give my head a shake and realize I am not fat. My son doesn't even weigh what I lost and he is 11! I think it was this feeling that partly led to me already putting some weight back on.

I have had several comments that I look 10 years younger though. My doc says I did this at the right time in terms of skin elasticity. I wish my stomach bounced back as well as my face!

I did bump in to someone I haven't seen since high school who recognized me. I have to wonder if he would have known me before IP?

My DH is trying to decide on a diet at the moment and I'm trying to explain this feeling to him. He thinks it's crazy. I'm so glad to get the validation I need here.
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Old 01-06-2015, 02:58 PM   #33  
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Wow - thank you all for your contributions to this thread which I have been voraciously reading. I can relate with everything on here. I don't recognize old photos of myself - am embarrassed by them - and yet am still so critical of myself. I made it down to 160 then rebounded during the fall. Am restarting now.

One of the big mind games I've experienced is that as the weight has come off, I feel the invisibility cloak (Potter fans out there?) coming off in good and bad ways. It angers me sometimes because it's not just in my mind. I don't just feel more noticeable (which is hard when I'm so (self)conscious and critical of my physical self) but also that people find me more credible. That haunts me. I work in a highly professional environment and my business success has improved as the weight has shed... now yes, some of this is attributable to greater confidence but I also think it is the fat shaming playing out in reverse. I know that I am my own worst critic but I can see people treating me differently and it has caused me to really appreciate those who loved me before and throughout and no matter what.

I appreciate the bravery of all of you on this thread. This is deep introspective stuff.

I have been too chicken to post this link to date but my clinic asked me to participate in a promotional video that they did... here it goes. I hope some of you find motivation in it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qvYpv-QzjOs
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Old 01-06-2015, 03:40 PM   #34  
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Originally Posted by zerenazerena View Post
Wow - thank you all for your contributions to this thread which I have been voraciously reading. I can relate with everything on here. I don't recognize old photos of myself - am embarrassed by them - and yet am still so critical of myself. I made it down to 160 then rebounded during the fall. Am restarting now.

One of the big mind games I've experienced is that as the weight has come off, I feel the invisibility cloak (Potter fans out there?) coming off in good and bad ways. It angers me sometimes because it's not just in my mind. I don't just feel more noticeable (which is hard when I'm so (self)conscious and critical of my physical self) but also that people find me more credible. That haunts me. I work in a highly professional environment and my business success has improved as the weight has shed... now yes, some of this is attributable to greater confidence but I also think it is the fat shaming playing out in reverse. I know that I am my own worst critic but I can see people treating me differently and it has caused me to really appreciate those who loved me before and throughout and no matter what.

I appreciate the bravery of all of you on this thread. This is deep introspective stuff.

I have been too chicken to post this link to date but my clinic asked me to participate in a promotional video that they did... here it goes. I hope some of you find motivation in it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qvYpv-QzjOs
What a wonderful video (and story)!! Thank you for sharing and congratulations! You're an inspiration...
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Old 01-06-2015, 04:18 PM   #35  
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Originally Posted by zerenazerena View Post
...sometimes because it's not just in my mind. I don't just feel more noticeable (which is hard when I'm so (self)conscious and critical of my physical self) but also that people find me more credible. That haunts me. I work in a highly professional environment and my business success has improved as the weight has shed... now yes, some of this is attributable to greater confidence but I also think it is the fat shaming playing out in reverse. I know that I am my own worst critic but I can see people treating me differently and it has caused me to really appreciate those who loved me before and throughout and no matter what.
This is so true. I like to think I am inner-directed but in fact I rely too much on feedback from the people around me. One thing I've learned to watch out for is allowing feedback from other people to override my innate sense of my feel-best weight. When I feel really wonderful, people think I look a gaunt & will ask me with concern if I feel okay. When I am as much as 15-20 lbs over that sweet spot, people will say I look just right. But I feel sluggish and clumsy.
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